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All posts by assbastard


Thursday, 4 April 2013

Eskomonoise: THE UPDATE

quote [ Everything that you wanted to know is likely not answered, but it's a nice update about how the bastard's been. ]

The link in this entry goes to the last update in the Eskimonoise saga. I do hope you'll forgive me for being the one to post this in his stead, but, well, he answers why he's not around on SE anymore. He also answers how he's doing. Short answer: He's doing okay. Long answer: See extended.

[by assbastard@11:59amGMT] [+10 Informative] [38 comments]


Tuesday, 5 February 2013

Church Pre-School ROCKED by child sex scandal! Network Sweeps month makes mountain out of mole-hill! FILM AT ELEVEN!

quote [ The woman, who asked to be identified only as Jane Doe, said her 5-year-old daughter was caught by a teacher inside a bathroom at school giving oral sex to a 4-year-old boy. ]

When I played "doctor" as a 4- or 5-year old, it never made the evening news.

(Thumb unrelated to this specific sex scandal)
[by assbastard@3:11amGMT] [+2] [30 comments]


Monday, 12 November 2012

India Releases $20 Tablet for Students, Hopefully Avoiding Massacre Associated with $35 Tablet

quote [ He said the government is also trying to encourage the state governments to chip in by subsidising it further so that the device can eventually be available to students free of cost. ]

See extended for link to previous deadly $35 tablet.

[sci&tech] [by assbastard@8:13amGMT] [+5 Funny] [24 comments]


Tuesday, 7 August 2012

Louisiana Voucher School Expels Title IX, Pregnant Teens

quote [ The pregnancy policy it states that if a teacher or administrator suspects a female student of being pregnant (whether she is pregnant or not) the school can require her to have a pregnancy test and even select the physician. If the student is pregnant, she won't be permitted to attend classes on the campus of Delhi Charter School ]

I really didn't want to post MORE depressing news, especially seeing as how my outrage meter has been off the charts lately, but this is just too horrible to NOT post.
[politics] [by assbastard@9:37pmGMT] [+10 WTF] [26 comments]


Thursday, 12 January 2012

Ventura County Girl Scout calls for ban on Trans, fats.

quote [ A reportedly 14-year-old Girl Scout has joined with parents and Scout alumni to call for a boycott of the widely popular Girl Scout cookies, claiming the organization is using cookie proceeds to push a radical homosexual agenda at the expense of the Scouts’ safety. ]

Homophobic Girl Scout (really? Wasn't Girl Scouts founded on the principles of inclusiveness?) calls for boycott of Girl Scout Cookies because of transgendered boys being let in, prompting many to vow to buy MORE cookies this year.

[by assbastard@1:35amGMT] [+10 WTF] [363 comments]




Saturday, 31 December 2011

What you've been missing: Lit site owner comes to SE, out Christoforos Christoforo.

quote [ "your previous posts reveal that your comprehension of it so weak that you find incorrect grammar easier to understand than correct, don't know what the word grammar means, and have trouble conjugating the verb 'to be.'" ]

It's really impressive the level of condescending asshollery that's happening in this post. Just thought I'd let everyone know what's been going on here, in case people may have written it off or passed it up. I'll take the karma hit for reposting.
[literature] [by assbastard@8:01pmGMT] [+10 Funny] [66 comments]


Tuesday, 17 May 2011

Arnie Shtupped Housekeeper Who Proceeded to Have Offspring, Now 10+ Years Old

quote [ Shriver moved out of the family's Brentwood mansion earlier this year, after Schwarzenegger acknowledged the paternity. The staff member worked for the family for 20 years, retiring in January. ]

I just wanted the excuse to use the word "schtupped," I'll admit it.
[politics] [by assbastard@7:27amGMT] [+10 Interesting] [41 comments]


Saturday, 2 April 2011

Ask Assy Anything About His Upcoming Surgery!

quote [ I'm getting a gastric bypass in the very near future, and was wondering if anyone had any questions regarding it or me or my lifestyle now beforehand. See extended for background info and such. ]

Marked not worksafe because I know you fuckers too well.

[by assbastard@7:35amGMT] [+10 Good] [272 comments]


Tuesday, 29 March 2011

"Sexy Losers is dead.
Long Live the Thin H Line."

An announcement has come from Clay/Hard's "hardartist" livejournal account consisting of the above message and the link I have shared with you.

The Thin H Line begins anew.
[porn] [by assbastard@7:50amGMT] [+10 Informative] [29 comments]


Friday, 11 March 2011

If I can be serious for a minute...

quote [ Offer HELP to quake and tsunami victims in Japan. In US: Text REDCROSS to 90999 to donate $10. In Canada: Text REDCROSS to 30333 to donate $10. UK instructions in extended. ]

Pray all you want, but do something tangible and donate to the Red Cross or other non-profits that can ACTUALLY do something about it.

[by assbastard@9:14pmGMT] [+10 Good] [72 comments]



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