Sensible Erection | Dancing man wearing a horse mask cooks wild mushrooms.

Thursday, 10 January 2008

Dancing man wearing a horse mask cooks wild mushrooms.

quote [ Dude, I've seen everything. I think everyone has been de-sensitized to the usual shit on the Interweb (gore, shit-eating, etc). But this video is just disturbing as fuck. ]

someone please translate the text.

[by oth3r@8:43pmGMT] [+10 WTF]

Comments

ring riot said @ 8:45pm GMT on 10th Jan
Okay.

orcasha1 said @ 8:48pm GMT on 10th Jan
Disturbing it isn't. Odd in a film festival short film odd it is.
/yoda.

Amul Muzz said @ 8:49pm GMT on 10th Jan
Those were Aminita Muscaria (sp?) . Poison.

I hear you can get high eating small amounts, but that looked like a lot. Its Japanese, they have a mushroom fetish, they also have a suicide fetish....

Im scared.

RoboRonnie said @ 8:53pm GMT on 10th Jan
Did we just watch suicide? Hope not. Not again.

Nostrildamus said @ 8:58pm GMT on 10th Jan
They are not poisonous in the general sense. When they have been properly prepared for eating there is nothing toxic about them. The toxin is water soluble and is washed away by boiling. Many Amanita family mushrooms are prized for their culinary uses.

Amanita phalloides and Amanita ocreata are deadly, but Muscaria is not in relatively small doses. It will make you trip out and puke or shit, but it won't kill you under most circumstances, unless you eat a great deal of them.

Amanita Muscaria is commonly eaten in Japan.

Amul Muzz said @ 9:06pm GMT on 10th Jan
I do not know of any other mushroom that is red with white dots.

Amanita Muscaria are indeed toxic, the wiki (must be true) I just read said 1g is considered a toxic dose.

There are other mushrooms in the Amanita family that are edible that is true. I have eaten them.

Nostrildamus said @ 9:22pm GMT on 10th Jan
Toxic is a relative term. Toxic can mean it makes your stomach upset, or it can mean deadly.

I have partaken of Amanita Muscaria. I'm still alive.

And they eat it in Japan. This is a fact.

/shrug

Amul Muzz said @ 9:25pm GMT on 10th Jan
how much did you take?

They use it to kill flies for gosh sakes.

I seriously cannot find any literature on it being edible, help me out?

Nostrildamus said @ 9:34pm GMT on 10th Jan
It was a dried, prepared concoction of two smallish specimens. In Japan, they boil them. I think it is in one particular area of the country that they are considered a delicacy.

Clearly, you do *not* eat them raw. This is obviously rather dangerous. Even so, this very act has been done for thousands of years, most often by Shamans.

Drying them changes some of the chemicals in them. Boiling them in a certain manner reduces the toxicity to zero, if done correctly.

Remember, in Japan they also eat the puffer fish, parts of which can straight up kill you, bro.

Nostrildamus said @ 9:36pm GMT on 10th Jan
I forgot to add they also pickle them, I forget how exactly.

Amul Muzz said @ 9:55pm GMT on 10th Jan
Those guys will pickle anything...

fuzzo said @ 11:14am GMT on 11th Jan

pickled-penis-of-rasputin

donnie said @ 9:35pm GMT on 10th Jan
You can eat a small amount of Muscarias and they will give you a fucked up psych trip. They can kill you if you eat too many of them, though. The muscarias can be detoxified to a reasonable degree by curing/cooking/boiling, though, while ones like the destroying angel and death cap cannot.

donnie said @ 9:25pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:3 Underrated]
Amanitas have the wickedest names - "Destroying Angel" and "The Death Cap" really give you a solid sense of their predilection for not fucking around when it comes to turning your innards into pulverised shit.

As an aside, I coincidentally just read this article this morning :

I Survived the Destroying Angel

...intense

Nostrildamus said @ 9:31pm GMT on 10th Jan
Death cap is not Muscaria, that's A. Phalloides.

donnie said @ 9:36pm GMT on 10th Jan
Yes, I know. I was musing about the generally interesting names of the amanitas in general. More an aside, really.

donnie said @ 9:37pm GMT on 10th Jan
Amul brought up other amanitas in the family...i guess that's what prompted it.

Nostrildamus said @ 9:54pm GMT on 10th Jan
Yes, I misinterpreted what you said. My mistake.

blacksun said @ 5:02am GMT on 11th Jan
Ok so everything's fine now, right? Ok.

Nostrildamus said @ 9:38pm GMT on 10th Jan
OK

lilmookieesquire said @ 4:36am GMT on 11th Jan
"It felt great to get back home and in the routine of practicing my somatic exercises, exploring, and able to be comfortable in my body again. It was like coming home to my body as well. I encourage everyone to get a copy of Thomas Hanna’s book".

Because I can really trust this guy's judgment.

Nostrildamus said @ 9:28pm GMT on 10th Jan
Boletus Edulus can under some circumstances resemble Muscaria, when they just popped up. I was taught there were a couple others, but I forget which or where they grow. Maybe I should have said that Muscaria can resemble other types when in an immature state. I agree that Muscaria are pretty hard to mistake under most circumstances.

Amul Muzz said @ 9:52pm GMT on 10th Jan
You look for the veil if they are immature.

That is the first thing you look for, to make sure you dont get an Angel of Death or one of these.

I've never tried an Muscaria, so this is all news to me. I always was under the impression they were poison or drug like in very small tastes.

Nostrildamus said @ 9:58pm GMT on 10th Jan
That's what I thought too, until I met someone who used them. There are all sorts of stories about them, and they have a reputation that is pretty bad, but they won't kill you straight out unless you eat quite a few of them. Naturally, I think the confusion abounds because people aren't willing to experiment with the toxicity on themselves :)

We used to think you could take part of the cap out, and that was the trippy bit, or that you only ate the red bits, or something. All bullshit.

But I mean, I am not encouraging people to go out and eat them. I used to risk my life back in the old days with the eating of various psychedelic materials. I'm surprised I didn't get liver or kidney damage from the magic mushrooms (psilocybin) I used to eat, usually raw.

mwoody said @ 10:34am GMT on 11th Jan

sonofinterflux said @ 10:48am GMT on 11th Jan
More mushrooms that are or can be red with white dots/warts are the Amanita flavoconia and the Amanita parcivolvata. However, both of these species have stalks that have a yellowish dust or covering on them... The Flavoconia cap is normally yellow to orange, but can be brilliant red like var. muscaria. Parcivolvata is not supposed to have a skirt. I have personally found what I consider to be varieties of these two species (but I'm no mycologist). Otherwise, as far as I know, you are correct. Red cap, white dots/warts, white stem, volva or its remnants (skirt), and bingo, you got fly agarics.

I personally have not eaten any agaric or variety. I have read where that a typical amanita muscaria var. muscaria was growing conjoining an amanita phalliodes (death cap).

sonofinterflux said @ 10:55am GMT on 11th Jan
ahh, gotta add- Muscaria normally had concentric rings on it's volva as well as the aforementioned traits.

theolypse said @ 1:13pm GMT on 11th Jan
www.wormatlas.org/handbook/fig.s/EggFIG10.jpg

Nostrildamus said @ 9:03pm GMT on 10th Jan
In fact, they might not even be Muscaria, as there are several other types of mushroom that resemble them.

Nostrildamus said @ 8:53pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:3 Underrated]
THIS IS BRILLIANT GENIUS

This is what the internet is supposed to be about. My unfettered delight and approval knows no bounds. Superb.

Baxter_UK said @ 9:08pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:1 Insightful]
This should be the definition of the internet.

ring riot said @ 9:18pm GMT on 10th Jan
def·i·ni·tion (df-nshn)
n.
1.
a. A statement conveying fundamental character.
b. A statement of the meaning of a word, phrase, or term, as in a dictionary entry.

2. The act or process of stating a precise meaning or significance; formulation of a meaning.

3.
a. The act of making clear and distinct: a definition of one's intentions.
b. The state of being closely outlined or determined: "With the drizzle, the trees in the little clearing had lost definition" Anthony Hyde.
c. A determination of outline, extent, or limits: the definition of a President's authority.

4.
a. The jolly hijinks of a mushroom fanatic from Japan.

ring riot said @ 9:21pm GMT on 10th Jan
*slaps head*

All right, I'm going to bed now. I obviously meant to use the definition of "internet", not "definition".

Joke ruined :-(

Baxter_UK said @ 9:26pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:1 Funny]
That would be the definition of "definition".

Internet, (n.)

computing

1. Originally (in form internet): a computer network consisting of or connecting a number of smaller networks, such as two or more local area networks connected by a shared communications protocol; spec. such a network (called ARPAnet) operated by the U.S. Defense Department for the purpose of allowing senior military officials to share pr0n.

In later use (usu. the Internet): the global computer network (which evolved out of ARPAnet) providing a variety of information and communication facilities to its users, and consisting of a loose confederation of interconnected networks which use standardized communication protocols for the purpose of downloading massive amounts of pr0n.

2. Crazy naked dancing man in horse mask cooking wild mushrooms to some epic music.

ring riot said @ 9:30pm GMT on 10th Jan
There you go. Thank you, I was waiting for someone to fix that.

ring riot said @ 9:31pm GMT on 10th Jan
Sorry, forgot to mod you. :-(

Baxter_UK said @ 11:34pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:1 Insightful]
YOU WILL BE. (SORRY).

Amul Muzz said @ 8:58pm GMT on 10th Jan

Amanita muscaria

Amul Muzz said @ 9:11pm GMT on 10th Jan

genus amanita

warmseat said @ 9:04pm GMT on 10th Jan
Had the closing scene been a naked redheaded woman with tabi socks holding a FINIS sign, it would have been the ultimate intertube video.

Baxter_UK said @ 9:10pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:1 Insightful]
From the YT comments:

thatdood001: "Further proof that any dumbass can post stupid shit on the internet."

Yes, I think that dude successfully proved his own point there.

warmseat said @ 9:26pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:1 Insightful]
Don't read yuotube comments, please. They kill neurons.

Barnabas_Truman said @ 4:06pm GMT on 11th Jan

Once again, there is an appropriate XKCD for the situation.

ring riot said @ 9:29pm GMT on 10th Jan
Youtube comments.

*shudder*

donnie said @ 9:41pm GMT on 10th Jan
omg ,FAKE!!

arrowhen said @ 1:54am GMT on 11th Jan
stfu faggat!

Ifrit said @ 9:26pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:1 Underrated]
Final Fantasy 6 last battle theme with kefka. Weeeee.

I miss Japan so much

DarkShadowRavenDragonGrrl69 said @ 9:50pm GMT on 10th Jan
Yes.

+1 Dancing Mad.

How appropriate.

NuncEstBibendum said @ 10:48pm GMT on 10th Jan

miss Japan

PoTayToe said @ 11:55pm GMT on 10th Jan
I believe my laptop and I will be spending some quiet time together...

sociology_boy said @ 5:42am GMT on 11th Jan
yeah I love that game
the music really made this video awesome

The Iron Rite said @ 2:22pm GMT on 11th Jan
FUCK YES!

cardinal said @ 9:31pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:1 Funny]
That's it. Fuck it. No more. Game over. I'm going outside.

warmseat said @ 9:41pm GMT on 10th Jan [Score:2 Underrated]
THIS IS OUtSIDE.

spite48 said @ 5:00am GMT on 11th Jan
There is no ceiling, repeat, no ceiling. Over.

lilmookieesquire said @ 11:40pm GMT on 10th Jan
And to think, you can't even get a masters of psychology in Japan.

My God man... think of the case studies...

oth3r said @ 11:45pm GMT on 10th Jan
what? you can't get a masters of psychology in japan?

lilmookieesquire said @ 1:31am GMT on 11th Jan
Correct. You can get an undergrad, and you can get some fucked up certificates, but there is no masters program recognized in Japan...

Unless my ex was a lying bitch whore who was playing with my mind.

I'd sure love to... go outside, wait in line, and deliver a box of fresh hot angel cream ponce de lion donuts just outside her doorstep... right about now.

MrZeroPing said @ 4:56am GMT on 11th Jan
I think you ex was lying to you hardcore. There is definitely "masters programs" in Japan. Its called "daigakuin." I'm considering applying for a Ministry of Education scholarship to get my masters degree in Japanese while I'm living here in Japan. Japanese people don't really know about "masters degrees" or anything academic because they just want to graduate and get the job they will work at until they either die or retire. They don't really think about furthering their education like the west does.

Where do you live? Let's go drink beer together sometime.

lilmookieesquire said @ 5:21am GMT on 11th Jan
Ah sorry, I meant for psychology, but maybe she WAS lying.

I'm in Kokubunji, Chou-sen, in Tokyo if you are ever in town.

Vernes said @ 12:26am GMT on 11th Jan
I.. I want to know why.
I must know, it mosthave a reason!
It must!

lilmookieesquire said @ 1:33am GMT on 11th Jan
What really creeps me out is the person who was filming it.

lilmookieesquire said @ 2:02am GMT on 11th Jan
It's a shit translation because my kanji is seriously shitty, and while half the room can prolly do better, here is the gist...

At 0:40
"Name of the mushroom...
something something
watch how you eat it..."

At 0:54
"Be.ni.te.n.gu. ta.ke" (ta.ke=mushroom. Benitengu is the name maybe?)
itsu ni (when you)
Something something"

At 1:09
"nu.ta.ke.n recommendation
Be.ni.te.n.gu something something" (from the context of the rest of the video, and the next slides, I'm guessing cooking instructions)

1:24
"Same as 1:09
Step 1: cut?

Step 2: something about an onion.
x important tip.

2:39
Step 3: fry... something something. (he puts the mushroom stalks in the pan... so fry the mushroom stalks?)

at 3:11
Onion (that might be the name of the guy) "I want to something something<--kanji for body"

3:57
"Itadakimasu!" (this is the equivalent of saying grace before you eat)
x same thing previously mentioned in step 2 I think.

5:42
I believe this section loosely translates into...
that concludes part one. Now it's time for some "thriller! MJ style bitches"

at 6:34
I have no........... fucking idea.

at 6:38
I think it's just what to expect for the next episode

at 6:58
"it's WM circle (that's what they call college/school/activity clubs) something something funky something something address"

NuncEstBibendum said @ 2:48am GMT on 11th Jan
That's something.

sensibleb said @ 2:05am GMT on 11th Jan [Score:2 Funny]
You have successfully harvested Fly Amanita.

Caffeine said @ 2:17am GMT on 11th Jan
HELLO NEW POTION.

KingPellinore said @ 3:30am GMT on 11th Jan
By the way... Do you happen to know what the fine is here in Cyrodiil for necrophilia? Just asking.

Narrenschiff said @ 7:07am GMT on 11th Jan
If you happen to be the archmage (which we all probably are) then you can probably get away with it. Either way if anyone sees you just slip on the grey cowl and get the fudge outta there.

Black Stallion Paper said @ 7:08am GMT on 11th Jan
GREY FOX FOUND SODOMIZING CORPSE OUTSIDE IMPERIAL CITY

arrowhen said @ 2:27am GMT on 11th Jan [Score:1 Funny]
I didn't find this disturbing in the slightest.

marshakyuss said @ 2:40am GMT on 11th Jan
everyone and their mother is just trying to get famous on youtube by doing super random retardedness. lame.

Wax said @ 2:49am GMT on 11th Jan
I'll stick with cubensis.

There is a reason those mushrooms look the way they do.
"Hi. I am a mushroom. I am not good to eat."

They are a deleriant not a hallucinogen anyway.

paul_austin0816 said @ 3:05am GMT on 11th Jan
pure genius....

ckfahrenheit said @ 4:26am GMT on 11th Jan

arrowhen said @ 4:35am GMT on 11th Jan
At least it's circumcised.

Amul Muzz said @ 5:08am GMT on 11th Jan
Hobbits!

Baxter_UK said @ 5:23am GMT on 11th Jan [Score:1 Insightful]
I'd cook her mushrooms.

Transfer said @ 10:06am GMT on 11th Jan
She looks like she's 7...

theolypse said @ 3:25pm GMT on 11th Jan [Score:1 Insightful]
Was that "her" a possessive pronoun or an indirect object?

Baxter_UK said @ 1:43am GMT on 12th Jan
Either's good.

oth3r said @ 3:32pm GMT on 11th Jan
more of her please

oth3r said @ 2:31am GMT on 12th Jan
seriously :(

MrZeroPing said @ 4:50am GMT on 11th Jan [Score:2 Informative]
Translation follows of all the screens (for anyone that is curious.)

Screen 1 "Decided to try and eat poisonous mushrooms that I picked while completely naked."

2 "AT LAST! I found a benitengutake" (benitengutake is Amanita muscarina (Fr.) Hooker)

3 "Wotake's recommended way of preparation"
Step 1: Boil
Step 2: Cutting an onion (an additional garnish is a must!)
Step 3: Grill.

4. ONIONS: I want to combine them with the mushrooms.

5. Rub a dub dub, thanks for the grub (or your preferred blessing before a meal). *disregarding any sense of proper serving size

When the WM. Logo starts to appear he starts to talk about his future projects he wants to do. The first is to dance Thriller while naked. His problem with this is he can't do the moonwalk and his filming technique is bad. Then he wants to create a song with the anime character that appears next to him in a studio while naked. The problem with this is patience to compose and write the song and meet with Miku. The third project is "I skied whilst naked".

lilmookieesquire said @ 5:18am GMT on 11th Jan
My translation was totally better :B
(thanks. and, oh, don't let on OK!)

MrZeroPing said @ 5:22am GMT on 11th Jan
(ok. I actually started writing this 6 hours ago but I got a call from my coworkers and they wanted to take me out drinking. So I closed my laptop halfway through and finished it when I got home.)

lilmookieesquire said @ 3:33am GMT on 12th Jan
;)

RuneLancer said @ 10:55am GMT on 11th Jan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKyqoPinEL4

There's more of this little guy if you poke around. Such as him arguing with a tree.

It's not as messed up as the dancing mushroom-horse, but I'm starting to wonder if my trip to Germany this summer is a wise idea after all.

The Iron Rite said @ 8:01pm GMT on 11th Jan
I laughed uproariously through the whole thing. I still can't decide how much of my response has to do with how funny it is or laughter as a base reaction.
I think I am now in Love with this man.