Another night in sensible wtf. Moon, stars, and all that stuff. The innocents of the town all warm and cozy in their beds, dreaming sweet dreams of bunny rabbits, and fluffy lolcats. The fools! Completely unaware that while they sleep, a lone figure works tirelessly to keep their town intact.

Aidentas sleeps fitfully, dreaming of Bruford T Justice, and being on the road. His mouth opens, and a "Hooooooonk" escapes, but before he can close it, it's filled with meat. What is this? Sleep rape! A shadowy figure stands over him, forcing his sausage in and out of his mouth.
"Swallow damnit, swallow!"
"Ngggngg"
Against Aidentas' will, the mysterious figure feeds him the sausage, inch by delicious inch, relentlessly ramming it down poor Aidentas' throat.
Suddenly, just before he passes out, in awe of the strangers meat, the ordeal is over.

Aidentas is left feeling violated, and horribly alone in this cold night. A single tear drips down his sweat-sheened cheek, and a huge sob escapes him.

But!

"Ngggg!!" What whatthefuckery is this?! The nightmare resumes anew!

This time it is the DJSausage that fills his unwilling orifice.

*Later*

Before returning to the sanctuary of his mysterious lair (rumoured to be a pirate ship outfitted like a dojo, that drifts whereever evil lurks, but no-one really knows), the stranger had but one more task.

The shards of glass cascaded to the floor, with menacing symphony. Verycleanteeth was rudely interrupted by this book hitting him hard in the temple. Dazed by the assault, he lay for several moments, trying to collect his scattered, scared thoughts. The damned sexy figure stood, silhouetted dramatically, curtains billowing around him like a cape, and the moon above his head, like a halo. VCT hurriedly clamped his mouth shut, it was agape at the drama of the situation. He had heard some horrible rumours of mouth rape that night, but, he was safe.

"Your horrible footcare caused me to be fired, villainous scum"
"Wh-What?"
"Fallen Arches"
"Wh-What? Why were you fired because of fallen arches?"
"I was an architect!"

With that terrible line, the stranger was gone, leaving Verycleanteeth's teeth unsullied, for now.
---
Elsewhere, the shadow of a man flickers in the candlelight.

"DirtyBirdy, in penance, pleading with his lord for forgiveness. His prayers will go unanswered, and his sins will rest heavy on his shoulders in death!" thought Philistine.

His tootsteps rang heavily through the church like claps of thunder from an angry maker. DirtyBirdy exited the confession box with a look of contempt.

"I am here to educate you," said Philistine, "in the art of mouth raping."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that."

Dirtybirdy began to glow a bright blue-white. The color of phazon. His human form burned away to reveal a large, many eyed crab like creature. He was a metroid prime baddie! What the fuck is that doing in here?

Philistine looked upon dirtybirdy's true form in awe.

"So, you've actually met Samus? That is so fucking cool--"

Philistine was unceremoniously impaled upon one of dirtybirdy's many sharp claws. Close to death, he used the last of his strength to pull an ornate tome from his satchel.

"The Book of Curse..." he whispered.

Oddly enough, the book contained not a crest, or whatever, but an Instant Killer. It was, however, an Instant Killer of manufacture by Umbrella Corp. Whaddya know.

The Instant Killer emitted a high pitched whine as several gyroscopic mechanisms activated inside the small cube. A mass of silvery tentacles burst from the surface of the device, wrapping themselves rapidly around both philistine and dirtybirdy. Within seconds they were entirely covered.

"Jesus!" said dirtybirdy. "I guess I'll suffocate now."

And that he did.

Justus and eightysix walked by.

"Holy shit, a metroid prime being killed by a device activated by the town crazy! How unprecedented," said justus.

"I am totally tripping balls right now," remarked eightysix.

A large crack in the pavement caused Justus to fall.

"Oh, I seem to have fallen upon a Bullet of the Vigilante conveniently placed under me! I die!"

Justus died. He was a townie! C'mon, a baddie wouldn't be a cop! Right? Right.


---



Yep, a bit lackluster, but it's the best I have for you at the moment. What was philistine, you ask? Well, he was the philistine role! And a townie.



Players:
1. Narrenschiff - Pinata - Busted, a Pinata
2. qtemo - The Guy Who's In - Deceased by Baddies, Townie
3. redemption - Our Savior
4. Jewbacchus - Gentile Teetotaller - Thrown Into The Sun By Baddies, Idiot
5. eskimonoise - eskimonoise
6. rash1 - Risk Analysis Expert - Lynched, Blocker
7. Aidentas - Truck Driver
8. schatten00777 - Not Kishi
9. kishi - Not schatten00777
10. Saint Marck - God
11. badgerbaiter - Not Signed Up - Dead by Baddies, Townie
12. shineythings - Android - Android Baddie, Lynched
13. Philistine - Literature Professor - Killed by Baddies, Philistine
14. assbastard - Really A Nice Guy - Lynched, Investigator
15. Context - Slam Poet
16. djlotus - Alien - Lynched, Vanilla Townie
17. justus - Cop - Townie, Bulleted
18. Misanthrope - A Car - Producer Baddie, Deceased By Stray Bullet
19. Muefigilo - Hooked On Phonics - Lolcat Killed, Idiot
20. skainsmate - Harmonica Officer
21. verycleanteeth - Podiatrist
22. gough - Collects 200 Dollars
23. DirtyBirdy - Devout Catholic - Metroid Prime Baddie, Instant Killed
24. shortstop4313 - madpride impersonator
25. Eru - Emo Emu
26. eightysix - Painter - Still Feelin' Queasy, and tripping balls
27. CapnSilver - Guy Who Hates Videogames - Lynched, Townie

Items Can Now Be Used In Daytime! Reusable items can only be used once per day/night cycle.

Today, if you don't make at least two posts concerning the game, I will kill you. Really.

Day 0: http://sensibleerection.com/entry.php/67364
Day 1: http://sensibleerection.com/entry.php/67371
Day 2: http://sensibleerection.com/entry.php/67437
Day 3: http://sensibleerection.com/entry.php/67518
Day 4: http://sensibleerection.com/entry.php/67568