Silk said @ 6:20pm GMT on 16th May [Score:2 Informative] bo

illox said @ 9:05am GMT on 2nd Jan [Score:1 Insightful] well this is frigging strange, 404, the end of time, the land of crap. nothing... oh well, if it ain't here then it probably wasn't worth seeing anyway. guess your going to have to get your goetse or tranpron or autopsy photos what ever god awful crap you were looking for somewhere else, because there's a reason it doesn't exist here, and a reason you can't find it, you sick freak...

follywaggle said @ 3:23pm GMT on 27th Jul [Score:1 Insightful] the reason is out there

Modano said @ 12:22am GMT on 29th Oct [Score:1 Insightful] Mo' Drano wuz here.

sythe said @ 12:37pm GMT on 10th Oct [Score:1 Insightful] FYI, so was everyone else.

n0ah said @ 7:20pm GMT on 23rd Apr

illox said @ 9:05am GMT on 2nd Jan [Score:2] well this is frigging strange, 404, the end of time, the land of crap. nothing... oh well, if it ain't here then it probably wasn't worth seeing anyway. guess your going to have to get your goetse or tranpron or autopsy photos what ever god awful crap you were looking for somewhere else, because there's a reason it doesn't exist here, and a reason you can't find it, you sick freak...

smada said @ 2:07am GMT on 24th Feb [Score:-1 Overrated]

smada said @ 2:07am GMT on 24th Feb [Score:-1 Overrated]

<a href= said @ 6:11pm GMT on 22nd Jul Mwha

leezurd said @ 1:36pm GMT on 16th Feb *POOF* What the... :( *skitters off*

Sarahbear said @ 6:35am GMT on 14th Oct TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMBBBBBBBBEEEEEERRRRRRrrrrrrrrrr

n nm said @ 3:54am GMT on 5th Jun sdf

lmnop said @ 1:01am GMT on 29th Jul foreach

Phaedrine said @ 2:53pm GMT on 8th Nov フゥ~!

Phaedrine said @ 3:47pm GMT on 26th Sep http://shygypsy.com/farm/p.cgi?state=baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaeaaiaaabaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaoniaaaaibaaaaaaaaaaaaaoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa&style=yxwrsuzqaqvavaqvscqyyiswxrczzserqqxzvxtncadyutafrqgvytvnargavybgyitbcyki&i=2&j=2&cmd=guess&guess=+

said @ 3:40pm GMT on 8th Jun [Score:4] haha this is the lost page..... maybe I should write an error.. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- SORRY WE COULD NOT FIND THE PAGE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR --------------------------------------------------------------------------

De_Wr0ng said @ 3:24am GMT on 6th Aug Start of test

De_Wr0ng said @ 6:26pm GMT on 6th Aug --> Really the end of the test

f00m said @ 8:34am GMT on 20th Dec [Score:2] w00t X-files music!

At124 said @ 10:22pm GMT on 15th Jul [Score:-5 Overrated]

zenviper said @ 1:35am GMT on 10th Dec [Score:-1 Insightful] I saw his eyes on fire.

iamajohnson said @ 1:08am GMT on 23rd Jan fuckin' awesome

gunthar said @ 2:56am GMT on 9th Feb [Score:-4] godbless no script =)

benjamander said @ 4:07pm GMT on 17th Feb

RoboRonnie said @ 8:21pm GMT on 20th Feb Where... even ... am I?

Rojo^ said @ 10:38am GMT on 10th Jan [Score:-1 Overrated]

Rojo^ said @ 10:39am GMT on 10th Jan [Score:-1 Overrated]

f00m said @ 11:02pm GMT on 31st Jan [Score:-1] ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ SORRY, WE COULD NOT FIND THE PAGE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At124 said @ 10:21pm GMT on 15th Jul [Score:-2]

dagfari said @ 11:00am GMT on 2nd Feb [Score:1 Insightful] I can't resist commenting...

zenviper said @ 11:26am GMT on 20th Mar [Score:1 Insightful] Where am I?

crwk8 said @ 11:53pm GMT on 7th Jul omg! WTF is this shit!

Britney said @ 11:49pm GMT on 9th Jun [Score:1 Interesting] I know I may be young, but I got feelings too.

smada said @ 3:08am GMT on 12th Jan OMFFG Bri7n3y is Teh H4wT s3XXX0rZ

At124 said @ 5:59pm GMT on 1st Nov Only the marque & blink tags should be allowed!

At124 said @ 6:01pm GMT on 1st Nov Only the marquee & blink tag should be allowed!

f00m said @ 7:06pm GMT on 10th Apr I have feelings in my pants.

Spunky_Monkey said @ 9:07am GMT on 15th Jun What is this place you have led me to?

Crysallis said @ 1:36am GMT on 7th Jul 404 baybeh!

DirtyBirdy said @ 1:12am GMT on 10th Jul wow, it's the secret hidden section of SE...

Chop-Logik said @ 3:24am GMT on 23rd Jul YUO = FUX0rED UP/

EPT said @ 11:17pm GMT on 2nd Aug Abandon all hope ye who enter here - here be dragons!

Jason Velocity said @ 11:36pm GMT on 2nd Aug Now that is cool Supa Secret Hideout!

david_the_bumblebee said @ 1:25am GMT on 3rd Aug WTFack?

smada said @ 2:08am GMT on 24th Feb worthlessfugarte here older guestbook profile 2003-02-19 at 10:13 p.m. Today was no good. I wish I knew how too say more. 2003-02-04 at 8:56 p.m. today= a new haircut a new rug michael and I moved my guitar to my room. hurrah. 2003-01-27 at 12:10 a.m. it's supposed to look like me. it I suppose I'm a bit chunkier. 2003-01-19 at 2:28 a.m. That's me! at fat camp! In the top left corner with my back turned! I'm the one with my hands on my hips not wrestling! me again! standing up in the black mab shirt! it looks like that guy is about to grab my ass. p.s. my sleeves are up because it was extra hot that day, not trying to look snazzy or anything. at it's peak, the temperature was about 97º. I'm up in the top right corner. hurrah. well those are all that I could fine. previous or next

Rude Boy said @ 1:37am GMT on 4th Aug Sunday, 4 August 2002 BoyGirlBang quote [ This is the very first video I ever shot, and I wanted to start things out with a bang, so I used the biggest, fattest, loser I've ever met - Bob. Anyway, I took Bob to a local mall and we spent nearly an entire day looking for a chick willing to do him before we finally found Mariah in the parking lot. It ended up costing $600, but it was worth it! Enjoy the video! ] posted by airkiwi @ 5:10am GMT | add to watchlist | 4 comments (2 new) Hi-grade SE New sexylosers! Just thought I'd share. :) posted by windex @ 3:03pm GMT | add to watchlist | 14 comments Low quality SE

matt said @ 3:17am GMT on 4th Aug I like it up the bum.

smada said @ 10:46pm GMT on 19th Feb indeed

gallery404 said @ 12:34pm GMT on 27th Aug Do you douche or use and enema first? Can you have an orgasm just from anal? Or is just more injoyable, much the way many women love the feelings, penetration, opening yourself, giving pleasure without and actual culmination of ejaculet? Does your ass leak later, or get out of sorts? Thanks in advance!

tristan said @ 4:28am GMT on 4th Aug And I like giving it up the bum. Bend over, sexy.

kuskus said @ 12:01am GMT on 29th Dec Both of you bend over

Robyn said @ 5:36am GMT on 4th Aug I just like it period! Its just unfortunate I dont get it from Amul Muzz cause he is the sexiest beast evah!!!!!! I Roxxoer teh L33ts!!!!

Fenny said @ 1:20am GMT on 11th Mar whatever happened to Amul Muzz, he was teh cool?

[ploink] said @ 10:16am GMT on 23rd Aug wow, what an interesting page http://exploitationnow.com/ http://truemeaningoflife.com/ http://www.blindwino.com/driver.html http://tang.keenspace.com/ http://sluggy.com/ http://gpf-comics.com/ http://www.explodingdog.com/ http://www.dieselsweeties.com/ http://yellow5.com/pokey/ http://isometric.spaceninja.com/ http://hammerspace.fojar.com/ http://hensel.lifepatterns.net/

Interficium said @ 6:41am GMT on 24th Aug [Score:-1 Troll] Sluggy fucking sucks and always has.

[ploink] said @ 9:32am GMT on 24th Aug Did I say you could speak?

Jag said @ 11:28pm GMT on 28th Aug Sluggy is kinda losing its humor. For a while, it was funny... now, it's horrible. Meh, the best of us can fall

Jor said @ 7:04am GMT on 11th Sep Just testing ;) test [url]http://www.cannedtunes.net/fusker/?uri=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.babesandcars.com%2Fcc-content%2Fcontent%2Fcsbpics%2Fmatrix%2Fadashabd1024%2Fhigh%2FO-adashabdGG%5B001-133%5D.jpg&displaytype=images[/url]

Jor said @ 7:04am GMT on 11th Sep Just testing ;) test [url]http://www.cannedtunes.net/fusker/?uri=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.babesandcars.com%2Fcc-content%2Fcontent%2Fcsbpics%2Fmatrix%2Fadashabd1024%2Fhigh%2FO-adashabdGG%5B001-133%5D.jpg&displaytype=images[/url]

phishfood said @ 12:54pm GMT on 12th Sep FUCK Y'ALL I'M PHISHPHOOD AND YOU CAN EAT MA BALL'Z

friedbeer said @ 1:15pm GMT on 28th Sep Hello to the fine gentlemen & ladies of SE. *burp*

co.pilot said @ 2:05am GMT on 1st Nov what the hell is this? some sort of sensible erection easter egg?

BergZ said @ 5:28pm GMT on 10th Jan Golgatha, SE style.

Spunky_Monkey said @ 4:35am GMT on 10th Nov [Score:1 Insightful] I think THIS is where we should hide the pr0n links

von_sanchez said @ 1:40am GMT on 11th Aug Why not in 8008135?

Jamouse said @ 1:27am GMT on 11th Nov Egads

little hell said @ 6:36am GMT on 13th Nov all those dead babies......jesus glass blowing christ buggering a dolphin!

Trigger said @ 11:23am GMT on 13th Nov MENTION NO FETII IN THIS MOST SACRED OF PLACES.

p_headless_g said @ 10:00pm GMT on 27th Apr Fetus. Fetus, fetus, fucking fetus. Fetus fetus bo betus, banana fana fo fetus, me mi mo metus... FETUS!!! See? That's what you get. Mention no fetii indeed... How, may I ask??!?! Fetus...

Robyn said @ 12:13am GMT on 23rd Dec Merry Christmas. Deeez nuuutz.

Evan said @ 11:46pm GMT on 25th Dec lol look what i stumpled onto..

rebbel said @ 12:24pm GMT on 2nd Jan yummy yummy, nice chickies!!

follywaggle said @ 11:30pm GMT on 11th Jan And yet as of now it only has a +1 he he.

Hummus! said @ 12:09am GMT on 15th Jan [Score:1 Insightful] HUMMUS! LOVE YOU ALL!!! what this anyway!?

Trigger said @ 9:07am GMT on 6th May COME BACK TO US HUMMUS!!!!

nyq said @ 9:11am GMT on 22nd Jan dear me.

EPT said @ 7:18pm GMT on 25th Jan My god, that's a lot of mods. Where's my +/- 0 Confused?

friedbeer said @ 2:17am GMT on 26th Jan Belladonna gives great head. :P

awsmm said @ 2:05am GMT on 17th Feb Please let me out, Matt, I'll check the adult box next time!!!!!!!

Andrew said @ 1:48pm GMT on 1st Mar Where... am I? o_o

Chop-Logik said @ 6:05pm GMT on 1st Mar 3000th comment!

Chop-Logik said @ 6:06pm GMT on 1st Mar Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful.

smada said @ 5:10pm GMT on 27th Jul i think it's really cute.

p_headless_g said @ 4:12pm GMT on 27th Apr I knew I shouldn't have eaten that bag of gravy I found in the parking lot... It's like... through... the looking glass... man... *bleeds away into the night sky*

tomble said @ 8:20am GMT on 1st May What is this place?

MEEJA HOR said @ 11:34am GMT on 28th Jul [Score:1 Funny] This is 'the fourth place', Playstation got the third one

sensibleb said @ 12:59pm GMT on 17th May Bonehead hax0r nuked the SE front page, so I stumbled in here by accident. I feel so L337. Here is a broken image link:

Chop-Logik said @ 1:13pm GMT on 17th May thanks :) /me regrets looking at the code :D

sensibleb said @ 1:46pm GMT on 17th May /me knew you would. ;-D

sensibleb said @ 1:00pm GMT on 17th May Bonehead hax0r nuked the SE front page, so I stumbled in here by accident. I feel so L337. Here is a broken image link:

sensibleb said @ 1:42pm GMT on 17th May [Score:1 Funny] This was not a double-post. It's just an artifact created by the symmetry of this interdimensional nether-page.

Raoul Duke said @ 5:02pm GMT on 7th Jun [Score:4 Insightful] We were just outside of SE, on the edge of the web, when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like, "I feel a bit lightheaded, I think I fucked up the site." All of a sudden, the screen was filled with the ravings and babblings of porn addicts. Eh, fuck it. :)

Raoul Duke said @ 5:02pm GMT on 7th Jun [Score:1 Funny] We were just outside of SE, on the edge of the web, when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like, "I feel a bit lightheaded, I think I fucked up the site." All of a sudden, the screen was filled with the ravings and babblings of porn addicts. Eh, fuck it. :)

Raoul Duke said @ 5:09pm GMT on 7th Jun 2003, a double post on the internet. I recall one afternoon on SE, there I was - mother of God, there I I am /\/\ - I was a natural web addict, just clicking on whatever came by...

Raoul Duke said @ 5:15pm GMT on 7th Jun Apologies to the Good Doctor.

donnie said @ 11:42pm GMT on 18th Jun dooooeeeesss annnnyyyoooonnneee waaannnnnnnnttt soooommmeee SSSSSSSS EEEEEEE? Iiiiii gggggoooootttaaaaallll theeeeeee mmmmaaakkkkings riiiiggghhht heeeeeereee. Alllllll iiiiii neeeeddddddiiiizzza plllllaaaacccceeee tooo ffffffaaaappppp......

sensibleb said @ 8:04pm GMT on 22nd Jun FFFFFAAAAAPPPPP-FFFffAAAaaPPPpp-FFfffAAaaaPPppp- FffffAaaaaPpppp-ffffaaaapppp-fffaaappp-ffaapp-fap-fap-fap... (echoes off into the inky distance)

grinick said @ 6:53am GMT on 28th Dec IGNORE THE EFFECTS OF THIS TERRIBLE DRUG

PERL_ZEALOT said @ 4:32am GMT on 14th Jun I am still awesome.

Chop-Logik said @ 5:12am GMT on 14th Jun OMRGM U SUX

Chop-Logik said @ 5:13am GMT on 14th Jun bfgbgb

housewares said @ 5:24am GMT on 14th Jun where's the pron?

housewares said @ 5:25am GMT on 14th Jun [Score:1 Interesting] ?

housewares said @ 5:26am GMT on 14th Jun The Library of Babel

housewares said @ 5:26am GMT on 14th Jun "groovy"

graham said @ 4:18am GMT on 16th Jun wtf

colinxp said @ 5:21pm GMT on 24th Jun i am a cyberspace cowboy.

account said @ 12:37am GMT on 25th Jun What the fuck indeed. Pink and purple-you are now turning gay.

stmpynode said @ 12:19am GMT on 2nd Jul how straaange. i will have to leave my mark. [X]

insanemonkey said @ 10:04pm GMT on 6th Jul well well well...wasn't expecting this....pink...hmmm...how odd

Chop-Logik said @ 5:35pm GMT on 7th Jul you have smada to thank for that.

mykel said @ 3:52pm GMT on 14th Jul Heh.. I found this on my own. I AM SO SMRT!! This is why you never have your post IDs sorted chronologically ;)

felix said @ 11:45pm GMT on 21st Jul ooh, behind the curtain

Crysallis said @ 11:57pm GMT on 21st Jul Close that door!

Crysallis said @ 5:50pm GMT on 22nd Jul

Another_One said @ 1:17am GMT on 22nd Jul Banished by Crysallis

<a href= said @ 6:12pm GMT on 22nd Jul @#%&^

vahid said @ 4:44pm GMT on 27th Jul oh how cute..............

phishfood said @ 5:05pm GMT on 27th Jul POOOOOOOOO

gunthar said @ 5:29pm GMT on 27th Jul I fjrrred my pants.

MEEJA HOR said @ 6:02pm GMT on 27th Jul all this pink is making me feel rather camp

mzxfan said @ 6:11pm GMT on 27th Jul so this is what is in the end of wormholes...

racerx said @ 6:24pm GMT on 27th Jul What the fuck is wrong with SE?

De_Wr0ng said @ 10:04pm GMT on 27th Jul WTF?

sensibleb said @ 11:19pm GMT on 27th Jul [Score:1 Informative] Ok, there was this one time, when I was six years old, that I was sitting in front of the TV watching Deputy Dawg and eating peanut butter and jelly, that a plane crashed outside my house, only it wasn't a plane, it was a school bus, but it fell out of the sky, which for some reason was pink instead of blue, and anyway, this school bus fell out of the sky, and I ran outside to see if anyone was hurt, and the bus driver was Gino Vanelli, that guy who had those songs in the 80's about wild horses and black cars, and I asked him if school buses looked better in the shade, but he just kind of burbled "bllt-blb-ughh-blbb", because his face must have hit the steering wheel when he hit the ground, and most of his teeth were gone, well not gone really, a few of them were still stuck in the steering wheel and one or two were on the green plastic seat, which looked kind of brownish under the pink sky, and I thought maybe I should call an ambulance, but there was no one else on the bus but Gino, and I didn't care for him much anyway, so I went back inside and finished my sandwich.

sensibleb said @ 11:23pm GMT on 27th Jul Oh, and I like the number fifteen.

LeavemeAlone said @ 11:28pm GMT on 27th Jul Wow, this is really fucked up. I hope I get back to reality.

mewse said @ 12:37am GMT on 28th Jul oh my god wtf is going on, why are all the links pink, who posted the topic, wheres my sandwich

colinxp said @ 1:58am GMT on 28th Jul ahhh, i was hoping id be back here someday.

arteitle said @ 9:21am GMT on 28th Jul [Score:3 Funny] You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension: a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into... the Twilight Zone.

jornin said @ 11:16am GMT on 28th Jul Is SE ever going to work properly again?

MEEJA HOR said @ 11:32am GMT on 28th Jul [Score:2 Funny] In some ways i hope it doesn't. Every blog needs a gay pink backdoor to enhance it's mass appeal

sensibleb said @ 4:18am GMT on 30th Jul [Score:1 Interesting] Tee hee... you said gay pink backdoor.

Trigger said @ 7:25pm GMT on 12th Aug Tee hee... you said gay pink backdoor

quaint said @ 7:24pm GMT on 22nd Oct Astonishing..... In light of all these people saying "Gay pink backdoor", you too have managed to say "Gay pink Backdoor"!. Something seems amiss

leezurd said @ 11:52am GMT on 28th Jul Woops! Wrong door, sorry.

De_Wr0ng said @ 4:43pm GMT on 9th Aug End of test

f00m@nB@r said @ 3:42pm GMT on 12th Aug -->

De_Wr0ng said @ 4:39pm GMT on 9th Aug This still be errie.

De_Wr0ng said @ 4:41pm GMT on 9th Aug --> Double heh

De_Wr0ng said @ 4:43pm GMT on 9th Aug -->

skrewlooze said @ 12:59am GMT on 26th Aug bizarro world.

whatfor said @ 4:33am GMT on 26th Aug Here is where all of your pink flowing goodness dwells intimately with your main brain. Or, not.....

Rammek said @ 11:13am GMT on 26th Aug *wants to be part of the action* *hangs around* Oh well, that was fun. Bye.

De_Wr0ng said @ 11:31am GMT on 26th Aug What you all doing in my play room. Wahhhhhhhh .... Mommy......

EPT said @ 10:17pm GMT on 26th Aug Damn, there's another secret post somwhere, but I can't remember where...

Neo Kojiro said @ 2:03pm GMT on 30th Aug Well, to quote Chop-Logik: "OMG OMGWTF!"

graham said @ 4:51pm GMT on 20th Sep omg....the links are pink like the inside of my anus...

insensate said @ 12:02am GMT on 22nd Feb Thanks for sharing.

verycleanteeth said @ 4:26pm GMT on 21st Sep why is it pink? BTW, I wonder if people instinctively hit their brakes when they careen off cliffs

teh voice of teh intarweb said @ 12:46pm GMT on 22nd Sep THIS IS TEH VOICE OF TEH INTARWEB

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:31am GMT on 30th Sep Found this on accident. 9/30/03

rick_fagnolia said @ 4:11am GMT on 13th Oct I=teh scared of the secret page

graham said @ 5:02pm GMT on 7th Nov [Score:1 Insightful] I just tried to squeeze out a fart, and sent out a little poo.

little poo said @ 7:56pm GMT on 16th May And...Boy are my arms TIRED !

v21 said @ 2:00pm GMT on 24th Nov I don't think this is a good idea... I am nowhere near a long time member (just over as year) and i go through the archives when i am bored. I think, especially with the idea of sorting posts by over all + mods as suggested at the top of this post and matt's last post, that disallowing mods on old posts wouldn't be the best idea. Comments could have the timestamp tests, but entries like the dirty joke contest a while ago would be unfavorably affected.

ballinyourmouth said @ 7:22am GMT on 28th Nov I am full of awesome

blindnerd said @ 11:17pm GMT on 4th Dec Testing test testies

blindnerd said @ 11:18pm GMT on 4th Dec Testing test testies

nip said @ 2:34am GMT on 9th Dec There is no erection.

nip said @ 2:38am GMT on 9th Dec Should have taken the blue pill. Neo??? I BELIEVE!!!

Chicken Nuts said @ 3:06am GMT on 9th Dec Holy Fux...

p_headless_g said @ 4:16am GMT on 9th Dec 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p_headless_g said @ 4:19am GMT on 9th Dec [Score:-1 Overrated] 010011110110111001100101001000000110010001100001011110010010000001111001011011110111010100100111011011000110110000100000011101110110100101101100011011000110100101101110011001110110110001111001001000000110011101101001011101100110010100100000011000110111010101110100001000000110111101100110011001100010000001111001011011110111010101110010001000000111001101100011011100100110111101110100011101010110110101110011001000000110000101101110011001000010000001110000011100100110010101110011011001010110111001110100001000000111010001101000011001010110110100100000011101000110111100100000011011010110010100100000011011110110111000100000011000010010000001110011011010010110110001110110011001010111001000100000011100000110110001100001011101000111010001100101011100100010111000100000010011110111001000100000011000010010000001100111011011110110110001100100001000000110111101101110011001010010111000100000010001100111010101100011011010110010110000100000011011010110000101111001011000100110010100100000011001010111011001100101011011100010000001100001001000000110110101100101011000010111010000100000011100000110110001100001011101000111010001100101011100100010000001110111011010010111010001101000001000000111001101101111011011010110010100100000011000100110100101100111011000010111001101110011001000000111001101110100011001010110000101101011011100110010111000100000010010010010000001101100011010010110101101100101001000000111001101110100011001010110000101101011001011100010000001001101011001010110000101110100001000000110100101101110001000000110011101100101011011100110010101110010011000010110110000100000011010010111001100100000011100000111001001100101011101000111010001111001001000000110001101101111011011110110110000101100001000000110001001110101011101000010000001110100011010000110010100100000011100000110111101101001011011100111010000100000011010010111001100100000011101000110100001100001011101000010000001101111011011100110010100100000011001000110000101111001001011100010111000101110001000000100100100100111011011000110110000100000011011110111011101101110001000000110000101101100011011000010000001101111011001100010000001111001011011110111010101110010001000000110001001100001011011000110110001110011001011100010000001011001011001010110000101101000001011100010000001010100011010000110000101110100001001110111001100100000011100100110100101100111011010000111010000101110000011010000101000001101000010100100011001110101011000110110101101100101011100100111001100101110

arteitle said @ 4:46am GMT on 9th Dec 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graham said @ 6:37am GMT on 14th Dec WHERE IS MY HANDY PICTUAR!?!?!

Vampire_X said @ 8:52am GMT on 14th Dec +watchlist http://www.wickeddownloads.com/tazboard/indexy.html

kafir said @ 5:03pm GMT on 14th Dec this is bizarre. and the music.....

Vampire_X said @ 5:07pm GMT on 14th Dec yeah...

Vampire_X said @ 5:08pm GMT on 14th Dec also, someone has made all the text purple...

graham said @ 8:51pm GMT on 14th Dec Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute.

graham said @ 8:51pm GMT on 14th Dec Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute.

graham said @ 8:51pm GMT on 14th Dec Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute.

graham said @ 8:52pm GMT on 14th Dec Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute.

Vampire_X said @ 3:11am GMT on 15th Dec i suppose you where the one who made the background black too?

Vampire_X said @ 3:12am GMT on 15th Dec actualy, scrach that "too"

De_Wr0ng said @ 11:03am GMT on 20th Dec Black?

Todomanna said @ 6:23pm GMT on 18th Dec Weeeeeeeeeeee!

Todomanna said @ 7:48pm GMT on 18th Dec Did I mention "Weeeeeeeeeeee!"?

nip said @ 7:39pm GMT on 18th Dec ......I'm madly in love with teh ch0rp!

Chop-Logik said @ 4:45pm GMT on 3rd Oct I GOT IT ALL ON TAPE

Shutup said @ 5:14am GMT on 20th Dec This page owned mozilla. Which begs the question, where am I?

Baxter_UK said @ 7:34am GMT on 20th Dec Fuck, you've gone completely sideways, man. It'll blow you straight through the wall, stone dead in ten seconds.

grinick said @ 6:58am GMT on 28th Dec Ignore the effects of this....terrible drug

f00m said @ 8:33am GMT on 20th Dec lmao X-files music

letoofdune said @ 12:48pm GMT on 20th Dec Holy shit. I'm at the end of the web. SE is t3h p0wnd!

sensibleb said @ 12:58pm GMT on 20th Dec (When I think of Marck, I touch myself)

letoofdune said @ 1:08pm GMT on 20th Dec you too?

germanjulian said @ 6:34pm GMT on 28th Dec ?????????????? wehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Chris Woods said @ 7:48pm GMT on 28th Dec Huh. The page at the end of the world. And I can't resist the urge to comment.

f00m said @ 12:07am GMT on 29th Dec but how do i soment?

utah said @ 10:55am GMT on 29th Dec I hope I haven't brained my damage...

Rouge_Element said @ 2:05pm GMT on 29th Dec OMG!

graham said @ 5:05pm GMT on 29th Dec THIS POST IS NULL VOID DELEETEEED

penisinface said @ 6:52am GMT on 30th Dec this space intentionaly left blank

Vampire_X said @ 4:57am GMT on 5th Jan JibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabbervvJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabber

Vampire_X said @ 5:03am GMT on 5th Jan JibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabbervvJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabber

JOECAM said @ 6:45pm GMT on 5th Jan WTF

larger2day said @ 6:50pm GMT on 5th Jan Hey hey!!

larger2day said @ 6:51pm GMT on 5th Jan OMG the x files theme !!!!

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:57am GMT on 10th Jan [Score:-1] 'THE 120 DAYS OF SODOM' by The Marquis de Sade Translated by Austryn Wainhouse and Richard Seaver INTRODUCTION The extensive wars wherewith Louis XIV was burdened during his reign, while draining the State's treasury and exhausting the substance of the people, none the less contained the secret that led to the prosperity of a swarm of those bloodsuckers who are always on the watch for public calamities, which, instead of appeasing, they promote or invent so as, precisely, to be able to profit from them the more advantageously. The end of this so very sublime reign was perhaps one of the periods in the history of the French Empire when one saw the emergence of the greatest number of these mysterious fortunes whose origins are as obscure as the lust and debauchery that accompany them. It was toward the close of this period, and not long before the Regent sought, by means of the famous tribunal which goes under the name of the Chambre de Justice, to flush this multitude of traffickers, that four of them conceived the idea for the singular revels whereof we are going to give an account. One must not suppose that it was exclusively the low-born and vulgar sort which did this swindling; gentlemen of the highest note led the pack. The Duc de Blangis and his brother the Bishop of X***, each of whom had thuswise amassed immense fortunes, are in themselves solid proof that, like the others, the nobility neglected no opportunities to take this road to wealth. These two illustrious figures, through their pleasures and business closely associated with the celebrated Durcet and the President de Curval, were the first to hit upon the debauch we propose to chronicle, and having communicated the scheme to their two friends, all four agreed to assume the major roles in these unusual orgies. For above six years these four libertines, kindred through their wealth and tastes, had thought to strengthen their ties by means of alliances in which debauchery had by far a heavier part than any of the other motives that ordinarily serve as a basis for such bonds. What they arranged was as follows: the Duc de Blangis, thrice a widower and sire of two daughters one wife had given him, having noticed that the President de Curval appeared interested in marrying the elder of these girls, despite the familiarities he knew perfectly well her father had indulged in with her, the Duc, I say, suddenly conceived the idea of a triple alliance. "You want Julie for your wife," said he to Curval, "I give her to you unhesitatingly and put but one condition to the match: that you'll not be jealous when, although your wife, she continues to show me the same complaisance she always has in the past; what is more, I'd have you lend your voice to mine in persuading our good Durcet to give me his daughter Constance, for whom, I must confess, I have developed roughly the same feelings you have formed for Julie." "But," said Curval, "you are surely aware that Durcet, just as libertine as you..." "I know all that's to be known," the Duc rejoined. "In this age, and with our manner of thinking, is one halted by such things? do you think I seek a wife in order to have a mistress? I want a wife that my whims may be served, I want her to veil, to cover an infinite number of little secret debauches the cloak of marriage wonderfully conceals. In a word, I want her for the reasons you want my daughter - do you fancy I am ignorant of your object and desires? We libertines wed women to hold slaves: as wives they are rendered more submissive than mistresse, and you know the value we set upon despotism in the joys we pursue." It was at this point Durcet entered. His two friends related their conversation and, delighted by an overture which promptly induced him to avow the sentiments he too had conceived for Adelaide, the President's, Durcet accepted the Duc as his son-in-law, provided he might become Curval's. The three marriages were speedily concluded, the dowries were immense, the wedding contracts identical. No less culpable than his two colleagues, the President had admitted to Durcet, who betrayed no displeasure upon learning it, that he maintained a little clandestine commerce with his own daughter; the three fathers, each wishing not only to preserve his rights, but noticing here the possibility of extending them, commonly agreed that the three young ladies, bound to their husbands by goods and homes only, would not in body belong more to one than to any of them, and the severest punishments were prescribed for her who should take it into her head not to comply with any of the conditions whereunto she was subject. They were on the eve of realizing their plan when the Bishop of X***, already closebound through pleasure shared with his brother's two friends, proposed contributing a fourth element to the alliance should the other three gentlemen consent to his participation in the affair. This element, the Duc's second daughter and hence the Bishop's niece, was already more thoroughly his property than was generally imagined. He had effected connections with his sister-in-law and the two brothers knew beyond all shadow of doubt that the existence of this maiden, who was called Aline, was far more accurately to be ascribed to the Bishop than to the Duc; the former who, from the time she left the cradle, had taken the girl into his keeping, had not, as one may well suppose, stood idle as the years brought her charms to flower. And so, upon this head, he was his colleagues' equal, and the article he offered to put on the market was in an equal degree damaged or degraded; but as Aline's attractions and tender youth outshone even those of her three companions, she was unhesitatingly made a part of the bargain. As had the other three, the Bishop yielded her up, but retained the rights to her use; and so each of our four characters thus found himself husband to four wives. Thus there resulted an arrangement which, for the reader's convenience, we shall recapitulate: The Duc, Julie's father, became the husband of Constance, Durcet's daughter; Durcet, Constance's father, became the husband of Adelaide, the President's daughter; The President, Adelaide's father, became the husband of Julie, the Duc's elder daughter; And the Bishop, Aline's uncle and father, became the husband of the other three females by ceding this same Aline to his friends, the while retaining the same rights over her. It was at a superb estate of the Duc, situated in the Bourbonnais, that these happy matches were made, and I leave to the reader to fancy how they were consummated and in what orgies; obliged as we are to describe others, we shall forego the pleasure of picturing these. Upon their return to Paris, our four friends' association became only the firmer; and as our next task is to make the reader familiar with them, before proceeding to individual and more searching developments, a few details of their lubricious arrangements will serve, it seems to me, to shed a preliminary light upon the character of these debauchees. The society had created a common fund, which each of its members took his turn administering for six months; the sums, allocated for nothing but expenses in the interests of pleasure, were vast. Their excessive wealth put the most unusual things within their reach, and the reader ought not be surprised to hear that two million were annually disbursed to obtain good cheer and lust's satisfaction. Four accomplished procuresses to recruit women, and a similar number of pimps to scout out men, had the sole duty to range both the capital and the provinces and bring back everything, in the one gender and in the other, that could best satisfy their sensuality's demands. Four supper parties were held regularly every week in four different country houses located at four extremities of Paris. At the first of these gatherings, the one exclusively given over to the pleasures of sodomy, only men were present; there would always be at hand sixteen young men, ranging in age from twenty to thirty, whose immense faculties permitted our four heroes, in feminine guise, to taste the most agreeable delights. The youths were selected solely upon the basis of the size of their member, and it almost became necessary that this superb limb be of such magnificence that it could never have penetrated any woman; this was an essential clause, and as naught was spared by way of expense, only very rarely would it fail to be fulfilled. But simultaneously to sample every pleasure, to these sixteen husbands was joined the same quantity of boys, much younger, whose purpose was to assume the office of women. These lads were from twelve to eighteen years old, and to be chosen for service each had to possess a freshness, a face, graces, charms, an air, an innocence, a candor which are far beyond what our brush could possibly paint. No woman was admitted to these masculine orgies, in the course of which everything of the lewdest invented in Sodom and Gomorrah was executed. At the second supper were girls of superior class who, upon these occasions forced to give up their proud ostentation and the customary insolence of their bearing, were constrained, in return for their hire, to abandon themselves to the most irregular caprices, and often even to the outrages our libertines were pleased to inflict upon them. Twelve of these girls would appear, and as Paris could not have furnished a fresh supply of them as often as would have been necessary, these evenings were inters- persed with others at which were admitted, only in the same number as the well-bred ladies, women ranging from procuresses up through the class of officers' wives. There are above four or five thousand in Paris who belong to one or the other of the two latter classes and whom need or lust obliges to attend soirees of this kind; one has but to have good agents to find them, and our libertines, who were splendidly represented, would frequently come across miraculous specimens. But it was in vain one was honest or a decent woman, one had to submit everything: our Lordships' libertinage, of a variety that never brooks limits, would overwhelm with horrors and infamies whatever, whether by Nature or social convention, ought to have been exempt from such ordeals. Once one was there, one had to be ready for anything, and as our four villains had every taste that accompanies the lowest, most crapulous debauch, this fundamental acquiescence to their desires was not by any means a matter of inconsequence. The guests at the third supper were the vilest, foulest creatures that can possibly be met with. To him who has some acquaintance with debauchery's extravagances, this refinement will appear wholly understandable; 'tis most voluptuous to wallow, so to speak, in filth with persons of this category; these exercises offer the completest abandon, the most monstrous intemperance, the most total abasement, and these pleasures, compared with those tasted the evening before, or with the distinguished individuals in whose company we have tasted them, have a way of lending a sharp spice to earlier activities. At these third suppers, debauch being more thorough, nothing was omitted that might render it complex and piquant. A hundred whores would appear in the course of six hours, and only too often something less than the full hundred would leave the games. But there is nothing to be gained by hurrying our story or by broaching subjects which can only receive adequate treatment in the sequel. As for the fourth supper, it was reserved for young maids; only those between the ages of seven and fifteen were permitted. Their condition in life was of no importance, what counted was their looks: they had to be charming; as for their virginity, authentic evidence was required. Oh, incredible refinement of libertinage! It was not, assuredly, that they wished to pluck all those roses, and how indeed could they have done so? for those untouched flowers were always a score in number, and of our four libertines only two were capable of proceeding to the act, one of the remaining two, the financier, being absolutely incapable of an erection, and the Bishop being absolutely unable to take his pleasure save in a fashion which, yes, I agree, may dishonor a virgin but which, however, always leaves her perfectly intact. No matter; the twenty maiden-heads had to be there, and those which were not impaired by our quartet of masters became, before their eyes, the prey of certain of their valets just as depraved as they, whom they kept constantly at beck and call for more than one reason. Apart from these four supper parties there was another, a secret and private one held every Friday, involving many fewer persons but surely costing a great deal more. The participants were restricted to four young and high-born damsels who, by means of strategy and money, had been abducted from their parents' homes. Our libertines' wives nearly always had a share in this debauch, and their extreme submissiveness, their docile attentions, their services made it more of a success each time. As for the genial atmosphere at these suppers, it goes without saying that even greater profusion than delicacy reigned there; not one of these meals cost less than ten thousand francs, and neighboring countries as well as all France were ransacked so that what was of the rarest and most exquisite might be assembled together. Fine and abundant wines and liqueurs were there, and even during the winter they had fruits of every season; in a word, one may be certain that the table of the world's greatest monarch was not dressed with as much luxury nor served with equal magnificence. But now let us retrace our steps and do our best to portray one by one each of our four heroes - to describe each not in terms of the beautiful, not in a manner that would seduce or captivate the reader, but simply with the brush strokes of Nature which, despite all her disorder, is often sublime, indeed even when she is at her most depraved. For - and why not say so in passing - if crime lacks the kind of delicacy one finds in virtue, is not the former always more sublime, does it not unfailingly have a character of grandeur and sublimity which surpasses, and will always make it preferable to, the monotonous and lackluster charms of virtue? Will you protest the greater usefulness of this or of that, is it for us to scan Nature's laws, ours to determine whether, vice being just as necessary to Nature as is virtue, she perhaps does not implant in us, in equal quantity, the penchant for one or the other, depending upon her respective needs? But let us proceed. The Duc de Blangis, at eighteen the master of an already colossal fortune which his later speculations much increased, experienced all the difficulties which descend like a cloud of locusts upon a rich and influental young man who need not deny himself anything; it almost always happens in such cases that the extent of one's vices, and one stints oneself that much less the more one has the means to procure oneself everything. Had the Duc received a few elementary qualities from Nature, they might possibly have counter-balanced the dangers which beset him in his position, but this curious mother, who sometimes seems to collaborate with chance in order that the latter may favor every vice she gives to those certain beings of whom she expects attentions very different from those virtue supposes, and this because she has just as much need of the one as of the other, Nature, I say, in destining Blangis for immense wealth, had meticulously endowed him with every impulse, every inspiration required for its abuse. Together with a tenebrous and very evil mind, she had accorded him a heart of flint and an utterly criminal soul, and these were accompanied by the disorders in tastes and irregularity of whim whence were born the dreadful libertinage to which the Duc was in no common measure addicted. Born treacherous, harsh, imperious, barbaric, selfish as lavish in the pursuit of pleasure as miserly when it were a question of useful spending, a liar, a gourmand, a drunk, a dastard, a sodomite, fond of incest, given to murdering, to arson, to theft, no, not a single virtue compensated that host of vices. Why, what am I saying! not only did he never so much as dream of a single virtue, he beheld them all with horror, and he was frequently heard to say that to be truly happy in this world a man ought not merely fling himself into every vice, but should never permit himself one virtue, and that it was not simply a matter of always doing evil, but also and above all of never doing good. "Oh, there are plenty of people," the Duc used to observe, "who never misbehave save when passion spurs them to ill; later, the fire gone out of them, their now calm spirit peacefully returns to the path of virtue and, thus passing their life going from strife to error and from error to remorse, they end their days in such a way there is no telling just what roles they have enacted on earth. Such persons," he would continue, "must surely be miserable: forever drifting, continually undecided, their entire life is spent detesting in the morning what they did the evening before. Certain to repent of the pleasures they taste, they take their delight in quaking, in such sort they become at once virtuous in crime and criminal in virtue. However,"our hero would add, "my more solid character is a stranger to these contradictions; I do my choosing without hesitation, and as I am always sure to find pleasure in the choice I make, never does regret arise to dull its charm. Firm in my principles because those I formed are sound and were formed very early, I always act in accordance with them; they have made me understand the emptiness and nullity of virtue; I hate virtue, and never will I be seen resorting to it. They have persuaded me that through vice alone is man capable of experiencing this moral and physical vibration which is the source of the most delicious voluptuousness; so I give myself over to vice. I was still very young when I learned to hold religion's fantasies in contempt, being perfectly convinced that the existence of a creator is a revolting absurdity in which not even children continue to believe. I have no need to thwart my inclinations in order to flatter some god; these instincts were given me by Nature, and it would be to irritate her were I to resist them; if she gave me bad ones, that is because they were necessary to her designs. I am in her hands but a machine which she runs as she likes, and not one of my crimes does not serve her: the more she urges me to commit them, the more of them she needs; I should be a fool to disobey her. Thus, nothing but the law stands in my way, but I defy the law, my gold and my prestige keep me well beyond reach of those vulgar instruments of repression which should be employed only upon the common sort." If one were to raise the objection that, nevertheless, all men possess ideas of the just and the unjust which can only be the product of Nature, since these notions are found in every people and even amongst the uncivilized, the Duc would reply affirmatively, saying that yes, those ideas have never been anything if not relative, that the stronger has always considered exceedingly just what the weaker regarded as flagrantly unjust, and that it takes no more than the mere reversal of their positions for each to be able to change his way of thinking too; whence the Duc would conclude that nothing is really just but what makes for pleasure, and what is unjust is the cause of pain; that in taking a hundred louis from a man's pocket, he was doing something very just for himself, although the victim of the robbery might have to regard the action with another eye; that all these notions therefore being very arbitrary, a fool he who would allow himself to become their thrall. It was by means of arguments in this kind the Duc used to justify his trans-gressions, and as he was a man of greatest possible wit, his arguments had a decisive ring. And so, modeling his conduct upon his philosophy, the Duc had, from his most tender youth, abandoned himself unrestrainedly to the most shameful extravagances, and to the most extraordinary ones. His father, having died young and, as I indicated, left him in control of a huge fortune, had however stipulated in his will that the young man's mother should, while she lived, be allowed to enjoy a large share of this legacy. Such a condition was not in displeasing Blangis: poison appearing to be the only way to avoid having to subscribe to this article, the knave straightway decided to make use of it. But this was the period when he was only making his first steps in a vicious career; not daring to act himself, he brought one of his sisters, with whom he was carrying on a criminal intrigue, to take charge of the execution, assuring her that if she were to succeed, he would see to it that she would be the beneficiary of that part of the fortune whereof death would deprive their mother. However, the young lady was horrified by this proposal, and the Duc, observing that this ill-confided secret was perhaps going to betray him, decided on the spot to extend his plans to include the sister he had hoped to have for an accomplice; he conducted both women to one of his properties whence the two unfortunate ones never returned. Nothing quite encourages as does one's first unpunished crime. This hurdle once cleared, an open field seemed to beckon to the Duc. Immediately any person whomsoever showed opposition to his desires, poison was employed forthwith. From necessary murders he soon passed to those of pure pleasure; he was captivated by that regrettable folly which causes us to find delight in the sufferings of others; he noticed that a violent commotion inflicted upon any kind of an adversary is answered by a vibrant thrill in our own nervous system; the effect of this vibration, arousing the animal spirits which flow within these nerves' con-cavities, obliges them to exert pressure on the erector nerves and to produce in accordance with this perturbation what is termed a lubricious sensation. Consequently, he set about committing thefts and murders in the name of debauchery and libertinage, just as someone else would be content, in order to inflame these same passions, to chase a whore or two. At the age of twenty-three, he and three of his companions in vice, whom he had indoctrinated with his philosophy, made up a party whose aim was to go out and stop a public coach on the highway, to rape the men among the travelers along with the women, to assassinate them afterward, to make off with their victims' money (the conspirators certainly had no need of this), and to be back that same night, all three of them, at the Opera Ball in order to have a sound alibi. This crime took place, ah, yes: two charming maids were violated and massacred in their mother's arms; to this was joined an endless list of other horrors, and no one dared suspect the Duc. Weary of the delightful wife his father had bestowed upon him before dying, the young Blangis wasted no time uniting her shade to his mother's, to his sister's, and to those of all his other victims. Why all this? to be able to marry a girl, wealthy, to be sure, but publicly dishonored and whom he knew full well was her brother's mistress. The person in question was the mother of Aline, one of the figures in our novel we mentioned above. This second wife, soon sacrificed like the first, gave way to a third, who followed hard on the heels of the second. It was rumored abroad that the Duc's huge construction was responsible for the undoing of all his wives, and as this gigantic tale corresponded in every point to its gigantic inspiration, the Duc let the opinion take root and veil the truth. That dreadful colossus did indeed make one think of Hercules or a centaur: Blangis stood five foot eleven inches tall, had limbs of great strength and energy, powerful sinews, elastic nerves, in addition to that a proud and masculine visage, great dark eyes, handsome black eyelashes, an aquiline nose, fine teeth, a quality of health and exuberance, broad shoulders, a heavy chest but a well-proportioned figure withal, splendid hips, superb buttocks, the handsomest leg in the world, an iron temperament, the strength of a horse, the member of a veritable mule, wondrously hirsute, blessed with the ability to eject its sperm any number of times within a given day and at will, even at the age of fifty, which was his age at the time, a virtually constant erection in this member whose dimensions were an exact eight inches for circumference and twelve for length over-all, and there you have the portrait of the Duc de Blangis, drawn as accurately as if you'd wielded the pencil yourself. But if this masterpiece of Nature was violent in its desires, what was it like, Great God! when crowned by drunken voluptuousness? 'Twas a man no longer, 'twas a raging tiger. Woe unto him who happened then to be serving its passions; frightful cries, atrocious blasphemies sprang from the Duc's swollen breast, flames seemed to dart from his eyes, he foamed at the mouth, he whinnied like a stallion, you'd have taken him for the very god of lust. Whatever then was his manner of having his pleasure, his hands necessarily strayed, roamed continually, and he had been more than once seen to strangle woman to death at the instant of his perfidious discharge. His presence of mind once restored, his frenzy was immediately replaced by the most complete indifference to the infamies wherewith he had just indulged himself, and of this indifference, of this kind of apathy, further sparks of lechery would be born almost at once. In his youth, the Duc had been known to discharge as often as eighteen times a day, and that without appearing one jot more fatigued after the final than after the initial ejaculation. Seven or eight crises within the same interval still held no terrors for him, his half a century of years notwithstanding. For roughly twenty-five years he had accustomed himself to passive sodomy, and he withstood its assaults with the identical vigor characterized his manner of delivering them actively when, the very next moment, it pleased him to exchange roles. He had once wagered he could sustain fifty-five attacks in a day, and so he had. Furnished, as we have pointed out, with prodigious strength, he needed only one hand to violate a girl, and he had proved it upon several occasions. One day he boasted he could squeeze the life out of a horse with his legs; he mounted the beast, it collapsed at the instant he had predicted. His prowess at the table outshone, if that is possible, what he demonstrated upon the bed. There's no imagining what had come to be the quantity of the food he consumed. He regularly ate three meals a day, and they were all three exceedingly prolonged and exceedingly copious, and it was as nothing to him to toss down his usual ten bottles of Burgundy; he had drunk up to thirty, and needed but to be challenged and he would set out for the mark of fifty; but his intoxication taking on the tinge of his passions, and liqueurs or wines having heated his brain, he would wax furious, and they would be obliged to tie him down. And despite all that, would you believe it? a steadfast child might have hurled this giant into a panic; true indeed it is that the spirit often poorly corresponds with the fleshy sheath enveloping it: as soon as Blangis discovered he could no longer use his treachery or his deceit to make away with his enemy, he would become timid and cowardly, and the mere thought of even the mildest combat, but fought on equal terms, would have sent him fleeing to the ends of the earth. He had nevertheless, in keeping with custom, been in one or two campaigns, but had acquitted himself so disgracefully he had retired from the service at once. Justifying his turpitude with equal amounts of cleverness and effrontery, he loudly proclaimed that his poltroonery being nothing other than the desire to preserve himself, it were perfectly impossible for anyone in his right senses to condemn it for a fault. Keep in mind the identical moral traits; next, adapt them to an entity from the physical point of view infinitely inferior to the one we just described; there you have the portrait of the Bishop of X***, the Duc de Blangis' brother. The same black soul, the same penchant for crime, the same contempt for religion, the same atheism, the same deception and cunning, a yet more supple and adroit mind, however, and more art in guiding his victims to their doom, but a slender figure, not heavy, no, a little thin body, wavering health, very delicate nerves, a greater fastidiousness in the pursuit of pleasure, mediocre prowess, a most ordinary member, even small, but deft, profoundly skilled in management, each time yielding so little that his incessantly inflamed imagination would render him capable of tasting delight quite as frequently as his brother; his sensations were of a remarkable acuteness, he would experience an irritation so prodigious he would often fall into a deep swoon upon discharging, and he almost always temporarily lost consciousness when doing so. He was forty-five, had delicate features, rather attractive eyes but a foul mouth and ugly teeth, a hairless pallid body, a small but well-shaped ass, and a prick five inches around and six in length. An idolater of active and passive sodomy, but eminently of the latter, he spent his life having himself buggered, and this pleasure, which never requires much expense of energy, was best suited to the modesty of his means. We will speak of his other tastes in good time. With what regards those of the table, he carried them nearly as far as the Duc, but went about the matter with somewhat more sensuality. Monseigneur, no less a criminal than his elder brother, possessed characteristics which had doubtless permitted him to match the celebrated feats of the hero we painted a moment ago; we will content ourselves with citing one of them, 'twill be enough to make the reader see of what such a man may be capable, and what he was prepared and disposed to do, having done the following: One of his friends, a man powerful and rich, had formerly had an intrigue with a young noblewoman who had borne him two children, a girl and a boy. He had, however, never been able to wed her, and the maiden had become another's wife. The unlucky girl's lover died while still young, but the owner howbeit of a tremendous fortune; having no kin to provide for, it occurred to him to bequeath all he had to the two ill-fated children his affair had produced. On his deathbed, he made the Bishop privy to his intentions and entrusted him with these two immense endowments: he divided the sum, put them in two purses, and gave them to the Bishop, confiding the two orphans' education to this man of God and enlisting him to pass on to each what was to be his when they attained their majority. At the same time he enjoyed the prelate to invest his wards' funds, so that in the meantime they would double in size. He also affirmed that it was his design to leave his offsprings' mother in eternal ignorance of what he was doing for them, and he absolutely insisted that none of this should ever be mentioned to her. These arrangements concluded, the dying man closed his eyes, and Monseigneur found himself master of about a million in banknotes, and of two children. The scoundrel was not long deliberating his next step: the dying man had spoken to no one but him, the mother was to know nothing, the children were only four or five years old. He circulated the intelligence that his friend, upon expiring, had left his fortune to the poor; the rascal acquired it the same day. But to ruin those wretched children did not suffice; furnished with authority by their father, the Bishop - who never committed one crime without instantly conceiving another - had the children removed from the remote pension in which they were being brought up, and placed them under the roof of certain people in his hire, from the outset having resolved soon to make them serve his perfidious lust. He waited until they were thirteen; the little boy was the first to arrive at that age: the Bishop put him to use, bent him to all his debauches, and as he was extremely pretty, sported with him for a week. But the little girl fared less well: she reached the prescribed age, but was very ugly, a fact which had no mitigating effect upon the good Bishop's lubricious fury. His desires appeased, he feared lest these children, left alive, would someday discover something of the secret of their interests. Therefore, he conducted them to an estate belonging to his brother and, sure of recapturing, by means of a new crime, the sparks of lechery enjoyment had just caused him to lose, he immolated both of them to his ferocious passions, and accompanied their death with episodes so piquant and so cruel that his voluptuousness was reborn in the midst of the torments wherewith he beset them. The thing is, unhappily, only too well known: there is no libertine at least a little steeped in vice who is not aware of the great sway murder exerts over the senses, and how voluptuously it determines a discharge. And that is a general truth whereof it were well the reader be early advised before undertaking the perusal of a work which will surely attempt an ample development of this system. Henceforth at ease in the face of whatever might transpire, Monseigneur returned to Paris to enjoy the fruit of his misdeeds, and without the least qualms about having counteracted the intentions of a man who, in his present situation, was in no state to derive either pain or pleasure therefrom. The President de Curval was a pillar of society; almost sixty years of age, and worn by debauchery to a singular degree, he offered the eye not much more than a skeleton. He was tall, he was dry, thin, had two blue lusterless eyes, a livid and unwholesome mouth, a prominent chin, a long nose. Hairy as a satyr, flat-backed, with slack, drooping buttocks that rather resembled a pair of dirty rags flapping upon his upper thighs; the skin of those buttocks was, thanks to whipstrokes, so deadened and toughened that you could seize up a handful and knead it without his feeling a thing. In the center of it all there was displayed - no need to spread those cheeks - an immense orifice whose enormous diameter, odor, and color bore a closer resemblance to the depths of a well-freighted privy than to an asshole; and, crowning touch to these allurements, there was numbered among this sodomizing pig's little idiosyncrasies that of always leaving this particular part of himself in such a state of uncleanliness that one was at all times able to observe there a rim or pad a good two inches thick. Below a belly as wrinkled as it was livid and gummy, one perceived, within a forest of hairs, a tool which, in its erectile condition, might have been about eight inches long and seven around; but this condition had come to be the most rare and to procure it a furious sequence of things was the necessary preliminary. Nevertheless, the event occurred at least two or three times each week, and upon these occasions the President would glide into every hole to be found, indiscriminately, although that of a young lad's behind was infinitely the most precious to him. The head of the President's device was now at all times exposed, for he had had himself circumcised, a ceremony which largely facilitates enjoyment and to which all pleasure-loving persons ought to submit. But one of the purposes of the same operation is to keep this privity cleaner; nothing of the sort in Curval's case: this part of him was just as filthy as the other: this uncapped head, naturally quite thick to begin with, was thus made at least an inch ampler in circumference. Similarly untidy about all the rest of his person, the President, who furthermore had tastes at the very least as nasty as his appearance, had become a figure whose rather malodorous vicinity might not have succeeded in pleasing everyone. However, his colleagues were not at all of the sort to be scandalized by such trifles, and they simply avoided discussing the matter with him. Few mortals had been as free in their behavior or as debauches as the President; but, entirely jaded, absolutely besotted, all that remained to him was the depravation and lewd profligacy of libertinage. Above three hours of excess, and of the most outrageous excess, were needed before one could hope to inspire a voluptous reaction in him. As for his emission, although in Curval the phenomenon was far more frequent than erection, and could be observed once every day, it was, all the same, so difficult to obtain, or it never occurred save as an aftermath to things so strange and often so cruel or so unclean, that the agents of his pleasure not uncommonly renounced the struggle, fainting by the wayside, the which would give birth in him to a kind of lubricious anger and this, through its effects, would now and again triumph where his efforts had failed. Curval was to such a point mired down in the morass of vice and libertinage that it had become virtually impossible for him to think or speak of anything else. He unendingly had the most appalling expressions in his mouth, just as he had the vilest designs in his heart, and these with surpassing energy he mingled with blasphemies and imprecations supplied him by his true horror, a sentiment he shared with his companions, for everything that smacked of religion. This disorder of mind, yet further augmented by the almost continual intoxication in which he was fond of keeping himself, had during the past few years given him an air of imbecility and prostration which, he would declare, made for his most cherished delight. Born as great a gourmand as a drunk, he alone was fit to keep abreast of the Duc, and in the course of this tale we will behold him to perform wonders which will no doubt astonish the most veteran eaters. It had been ten years since Curval had ceased to discharge his judicial duties; it was not simply that he was no longer fit to carry them out, but I even believe that while he had been, he may have been asked to leave these matters alone for the rest of his life. Curval had led a very libertine life, every sort of perversion was familiar to him, and those who knew him personally had the strong suspicion he owed his vast fortune to nothing other than two or three murders. However that may be, it is, in the light of the following story, highly probable that this variety of extravagance had the power to stir him deeply, and it is this adventure, which attracted some unfortunate publicity, that was responsible for his exclusion from the Court. We are going to relate the episode in order to give the reader an idea of his character. There dwelled in the neighborhood of Curval's town house a miserable street porter who, the father of a charming little girl, was ridiculous enough to be a person of sensibility. Twenty messages of every kind had already arrived containing proposals relating to the poor fellow's daughter; he and his wife had remained unshaken despite this barrage aimed at their corruption, and Curval, the source of these embassies, only irritated by the growing number of refusals they had evoked, knew not what tack to take in order to get his hands upon the girl and to subject her to his libidinous caprices, until it struck to him that by simply having the father broken he would lead the daughter to his bed. The thing was as nicely conceived as executed. Two or three bullies in the President's pay intervened in the suit, and before the month was out, the wretched porter was enmeshed in an imaginary crime which seemed to have been committed at his door and which got him speedily lodged in one of the Conciergerie's dungeons. The President, as one would expect, soon took charge of the case, and, having no desire to permit it to drag on, arranged in the space of three days, thanks to his knavery and his gold, to have the unlucky porter condemned to be broken on the wheel, without the culprit ever having committed any crime but that of wishing to preserve his honor and safeguard his daughter's. Meanwhile, the solicitations were renewed. The mother was brought in, it was explained to her that she alone had it in her power to save her husband, that if she were to satisfy the President, what could be clearer than that he would thereupon snatch her husband from the dreadful fate awaiting him. Further hesitation was impossible; the woman made inquiries; Curval knew perfectly well to whom she addressed herself, the counsels were his creatures, and they gave her unambiguous replies: she ought not waste a moment. The poor woman herself brought her daughter weeping to her judge's feet; the latter could not have been more liberal with his promises, nor have been less eager to keep his word. Not only did he fear lest, were he to deal honorably and spare the husband, the man might go and raise an uproar upon discovering the price that had been paid to save his life, but the scoundrel even found a further delight, a yet keener one, in arranging to have himself given what he wished without being obliged to make any return. This thought led to others; numerous criminal possibilities entered his head, and their effect was to increase his perfidious lubricity. And this is how he set about the matter so as to put the maximum of infamy and piquancy into the scene: His mansion stood facing a spot where criminals are sometimes executed in Paris, and as this particular offense had been committed in that quarter of the city, he won assurance the punishment would be meted out on this particular square. The wretch's wife and daughter arrived at the President's home at the appointed hour; all windows overlooking the square were well shuttered, so that, from the apartments where he amused himself with his victims, nothing at all could be seen of what was going on outside. Apprised of the exact minute of the execution, the rascal selected it for the deflowering of the little girl who was held in her mother's arms, and everything was so happily arranged that Curval discharged into the child's ass the moment her father expired. Instantly he'd completed his business, "Come have a look," quoth he, opening a window looking upon the square, "come see how well I've kept my bargain," and one of his two princesses saw her father, the other her husband, delivering up his soul to the headsman's steel. Both collapsed in a faint, but Curval had provided for everything: this swoon was their agony, they'd both been poisoned, and nevermore opened their eyes. Notwithstanding the precautions he had taken to swathe the whole of this exploit in the most profound mystery, something did indeed transpire: nothing was known of the women's death, but there existed a lively suspicion he had been untruthful in connection with the husband's case. His motive was half-known, and his eventual retirement from the bench was the outcome. As of this moment, no longer having to maintain appearances, Curval flung himself into a new ocean of errors and crimes. He sent everywhere for victims to sacrifice to the perversity of his tastes. Through an atrocious refinement of cruelty, but one, however, very easily understood, the downtrodden classes were those upon which he most enjoyed hurling the effects of his raging perfidy. He had several minions who were abroad night and day, scouring attics and hovels, tracking down whatever of the most destitute misery might be able to provide, and under the pretext of dispensing aid, either he envenomed his catch - to give poison was one of his most delectable pastimes - or he lured it to his house and slew it upon the altar of his perverse preferences. Men, women, children: anything was fuel to his rage, and at its bidding he performed excesses which would have got his head between block and blade a thousand times over were it not for the silver he distributed and the esteem he enjoyed, factors whereby he was a thousand times protected. One may well imagine such a being had no more religion than his two confreres; he without doubt detested it as sovereignly as they, but in years past had done more to wither it in others, for, in the days when his mind had been sound, it had also been clever, and he had put it to good use writing against religion; he was the author of a several works whose influence had been prodigious, and these successes, always present in his memory, still constituted one of his dearest delights. The more we multiply the objects of our enjoyments...(the portrait of Durcet) (a) ...the years of a sickly childhood. Durcet is fifty-three; he is small, short, broad, thickset; an agreeable, hearty face; a very white skin; his entire body, and principally his hips and buttocks, absolutely like a woman's; his ass is cool and fresh, chubby, firm, and dimpled, but excessively agape, owing to the habit of sodomy; his prick is extraordinarily small, 'tis scarcely two inches around, no more than four inches long; it has entirely ceased to stiffen; his discharges are rare and uneasy, far from abundant and always preceded by spasms which hurl him into a kind of furor which, in turn, conducts him to crime; he has a chest like a woman's, a sweet, pleasant voice and, when in society, the best-bred manners, although his mind is without question as depraved as his colleagues'; a schoolmate of the Duc, they still sport together every day, and one of Durcet's loftiest pleasures is to have his anus tickled by the Duc's enormous member. And such, dear reader, are the four villains in whose company I am going to have you pass a few months. I have done my best to describe them; if, as I have wished, I have made you familiar with even their most secret depths, nothing in the tale of their various follies will astonish you. I have not been able to enter into minute detail with what regards their tastes - to have done so now would have been to impair the value and to harm the main scheme of this work. But as we move progressively along, you will have but to keep an attentive eye upon our heroes, and you'll have no trouble discerning their characteristic peccadillos and the particular type of voluptuous mania which best suits each of them. Roughly all we can say at the present time is that they were generally susceptible of an enthusiasm for sodomy, that the four of them had themselves buggered regularly, and that they all four worshiped behinds. The Duc, however, relative to the immensity of his weapon and, doubtless, more through cruelty than from taste, still fucked cunts with the greatest pleasure. So also did the President, but less frequently. As for the Bishop, such was his supreme loathing for them the mere sight of one might have kept him limp for six months. He had never in all his life fucked but one, that belonging to his sister-in-law, and expressly to beget a child wherewith some day to procure himself the pleasures of incest; we have seen how well he succeeded. As regards Durcet, he certainly idolized the ass with as much fervor as the Bishop, but his enjoyment of it was more accessory; his favorite attacks were directed toward a third sanctuary - this mystery will be unveiled in the sequel. But on with the portraits essential to the intelligence of this work, and let us now give our reader an idea of these worthy husbands' four wives. What a contrast! Constance, the Duc's wife and the daughter of Durcet, was a tall woman, slender, lovely as a picture, and modeled as if the Graces had taken pleasure in embellishing her, but the elegance of her figure in no way detracted from her freshness, she was not for that the less plumpy fleshed, and the most delicious forms graced by a skin fairer than the lily, often induced one to suppose that, no, it had been Love itself who had undertaken her formation. Her face was a trifle long, her features wonderfully noble, more majesty than gentleness was in her look, more grandeur than subtlety. Her eyes were large, black, and full of fire; her mouth extremely small and ornamented by the finest teeth imaginable, she had a narrow, supple tongue, of the loveliest pink, and her breath was sweeter still than the scent of a rose. She was full-breasted, her bosom was buxom, fair as alabaster and as firm. Her back was turned in an extraordinary way, its lines sweeping deliciously down to the most artistically and the most precisely cleft ass Nature has produced in a long time. Nothing could have been more perfectly round, not very large, but firm, white, dimpled; and when it was opened, what used to peep out but the cleanest, most winsome, most delicate hole. A nuance of tenderest pink had shaded this ass, charming asylum of lubricity's sweetest pleasures, but, great God! it was not for long to preserve so many charms! Four or five attacks, and the Duc had spoiled all those graces, how quickly had they gone, and soon after her marriage Constance was become no more than the image of a beautiful lily wherefrom the tempest has of late stripped the petals away. Two round and perfectly molded thighs supported another temple, in all likehood less delicious, but, to inclined to worship there, offering so many allurements it would be in vain were my pen to strive to describe them. Constance was almost a virgin when the Duc married her, and her father, the only man who had known her, had, as they say, left that side of her perfectly intact. The most beautiful black hair - falling in natural curls to below her shoulders and, when one wished it thus, reaching down to the pretty fur, of the same color, which shaded that voluptuous little cunt - made for a further adornment I might have been guilty of omitting, and lent this angelic creature, aged about twenty-two, all the charms Nature is able to lavish upon a woman. To all these amenities Constance joined a fair and agreeable wit, a spirit somewhat more elevated than it ought to have been, considering the melancholy situation fate had awarded her, for thereby she was enabled to sense all its horrors and, doubtless, she would have been happier if furnished with less delicate perceptions. Durcet, who had raised her more as if she were a courtesan than his daughter, and who had been much more concerned to give her talents than manners, had all the same never been able totally to destroy the principles of rectitude and of virtue it seemed Nature had been pleased to engrave in her heart. She had no formal religion, no one had ever mentioned such a thing to her, the exercise of a belief was not to be tolerated in her father's household, but all that had not blotted out this modesty, this natural humility which has nothing to do with theological chimeras, and which, when it dwells in an upright, decent, and sensitive soul, is very difficult to obliterate. Never had she stepped out of her father's house, and the scoundrel had forced her, beginning at the age of twelve, to serve his crapulous pleasures. She found a world of difference in those the Duc imbided with her, her body was noticeably altered by those formidable dimensions, and the day after the Duc had despoiled her of her maidenhead, sodomistically speaking, she had fallen dangerously ill. They believed her rectum had been irreparably damaged; but her youth, her health, and some salutary local remedies soon restored the use of that forbidden avenue to the Duc, and the luckless Constance, forced to accustom herself to this daily torture, and it was but one amongst others, entirely recovered and became adjusted to everything. Adelaide, Durcet's wife and the daughter of the President, had a beauty which was perhaps superior to Constance's, but of an entirely different sort. She was twenty, small and slender, of an extremely slight and delicate build, of classic loveliness, had the finest blond hair to be seen. An interesting air, a look of sensibility distributed everywhere about her, and above all in her features, gave her the quality of a heroine in a romance. Her exceptionally large eyes were blue, they expressed at once tenderness and decency; two long but narrow and remarkably drawn eyebrows adorned a forehead not very high but of such noble charm one might have thought this were modesty's very temple. Her nose, thin, a little pinched at the top, descended to assume a semi-aquiline contour; her lips inclined toward the thin, were of a bright, ripe red; a little large, her mouth was the unique flaw in this celestial physiognomy, but when it opened, there shone thirty-two pearls Nature seemed to have sown amidst roses. Her neck was a shade long, attached in a singular way, through what one judged a natural habit, her head was ever so faintly bent toward her right shoulder, especially when she was listening; but with what grace did not this interesting attitude endow her! Her breasts were small, very round, very firm, well-elevated, but there was barely enough there to fill the hand. They were like two little apples a frolicking Cupid had fetched hither from his mother's garden. Her chest was a bit narrow, it was also a very delicate chest, her belly was satin smooth, a little blond mound not much garnished with hair served as peristyle to the temple in which Venus seemed to call out for an homage. This temple was narrow to such a point you could not insert a finger therein without eliciting a cry from Adelaide; nevertheless, two lustrums had revolved since the time when, thanks to the President, the poor child had ceased to be a virgin, either in that place or in the delicious part it remains for us to sketch. Oh, what were the attractions this second sanctuary possessed, what a flow in the line of her back, how magnificently were those buttocks cut, what whiteness there, and what dazzling rose blush! But all on all, it was on the small side. Delicate in all her lines, she was rather the sketch than the model of beauty, it seemed as though Nature had only wished to indicate in Adelaide what she had so majestically articulated in Constance. Peer into that appetizing behind, and lo! a rosebud would offer itself to your gaze, and it was in all its bloom and in the most tender pink Nature wished you to behold it; but narrow? tiny? it had only been at the price of infinite labors the President had navigated through those straits, and he had only renewed these assaults successfully two or three times. Durcet, less exacting, gave her little affliction in this point, but, since becoming his wife, in exchange for how many other cruel complaisances, with what a quantity of other perilous submissions had she not been obliged to purchase this little kindness? And, furthermore, turned over to the four libertines, as by their mutual consent she was, how many other cruel ordeals had she not to undergo, both of the species Durcet spared her, and of every other. Adelaide had the mind her face suggested, that is to say, an extremely romantic mind, solitary places were the ones she preferred, and once there, she would shed involuntary tears - tears to which we do not pay sufficient heed - tears apparently torn from Nature by foreboding. She was recently bereft of a friend, a girl she idolized, and this frightful loss constantly haunted her imagination. As she was thoroughly acquainted with her father, as she knew to what extents he carried his wild behavior, she was persuaded her young friend had fallen prey to the President's villainies, for he had never managed to induce the missing person to accord him certain privileges. The thing was not unlikely. Adelaide imagined the same would someday befall her; nor was that improbable. The President, in her regard, had not paid the same attention to the problem of religion Durcet had in the interests of Constance, no, he had allowed all that nonsense to be born, to be fomented, supposing that his writings and his discourses would easily destroy it. He was mistaken: religion is the nourishment upon which a soul such as Adelaide's feeds. In vain the President had preached, in vain he had made her read books, the young lady had remained a believer, and all these extravagances, which she did not share, which she hated, of which she was the victim, fell far short of disabusing her about illusions which continued to make for her life's happiness. She would go and hide herself to pray to God, she'd perform Christian duties on the sly, and was unfailingly and very severely punished, either by her father or her husband, when surprised in the act by the one or the other. Adelaide patiently endured it all, fully convinced Heaven would someday reward her. Her character was as gentle as her spirit, and her benevolence, one of the virtues for which her father most detested her, went to the point of extreme. Curval, whom that vile class of the poverty- stricken irritated, sought only to humiliate it, to further depress it, or to wring victims from it; his generous daughter, on the other hand, would have foregone her own necessities to procure them for the poor, and she had often been espied stealing off to take to the needy sums which were intended for her pleasures. Durcet and the President finally succeeded in scolding and pounding good manners into her, and in ridding her of this corrupt practice by withholding absolutely all means whereby she could resume it. Adelaide, having nothing left but her tears to bestow upon the poor, went none the less to sprinkle them upon their woes, and her powerless howbeit staunchly sensitive spirit was incapable of ceasing to be virtuous. One day she learned that some poor woman was to come to prostitute her daughter to the President because extreme need bade her do so; the enchanted old rake was already preparing himself for the kind of pleasure-taking he liked best. Adelaide had one of her dresses sold and immediately got the money put it in the mother's hands; by means of this small assistance and some sort of a sermon, she diverted the woman from the she was about to commit. Hearing of what she had done, the President proceeded to such violences with her - his daughter was not yet married at the time - that she was a fortnight abed; but all that was to no avail: nothing could put a stop to this gentle soul's tender impulses. Julie, the President's wife, the Duc's elder daughter, would have eclipsed the two preceding women were it not for something which many behold as a capital defect, but which had perhaps in itself aroused Curval's passion for her, so true it is that the effects of passion are unpredictable, nay, inconceivable, and that their disorder, the outcome of disgust and satiety, can only be matched by their irregular flights. Julie was tall, well made although quite fat and fleshy, had the most lovely brown eyes in the world, a charming nose, striking and gracious features, the most beautiful chestnut brown hair, a fair body of the most appetizing fullness, an ass which might easily have served as model to the one Praxiteles sculpted, her cunt was hot, strait, and yielded as agreeable a sensation as such a locale ever may; her legs were handsome, her feet charming, but she had the worst-decked mouth, the foulest teeth, and was by habit so dirty in every other part of her body, and principally at the two temples of lubricity, that no other being, let me repeat it, no other being but the President, himself subject to the same shortcomings and unquestionably fond of them, nay, no one else, despite her allurements, could have put up with Julie. Curval, however, was mad about her; his most divine pleasures were gathered upon that stinking mouth, to kiss it plunged him into delirium, and as for her natural uncleanliness, far from rebuking her for it, to the contrary he encouraged her in it, and had finally got her accustomed to a perfect divorce from water. To these faults Julie added a few others, but they were surely less disagreeable: she was a vast eater, she had a leaning toward drunkenness, little virtue, and I believe that had she dared try it, whoredom would have held little by way of terror for her. Brought up by the Duc in a total abandon of principles and manners, she adopted a whore's philosophy, and she was probably an apt student of all its tenets; but, through yet another very curious effect of libertinage, it often happens that a woman who shares our faults pleases us a great deal less in our pleasures than one who is full of naught but virtues: the first resembles us, we scandalize her not; the other is terrified, and there is one very certain charm more. Despite his proportions, the Duc had sported with his daughter, but he had had to wait until she was fifteen, and even so had not been able to prevent Julie from being considerably damaged by the adventure, indeed, so much so that, eager to marry her off, he had been forced to put a term to pleasure-taking of this variety and to be content with delights less dangerous for her, but at least as fatiguing. Julie gained little by gaining the President, whose prick, as we know, was exceedingly thick and, furthermore, however much she was dirty from neglect of herself, she could not in any wise keep up with a filthiness in debauch such as the one that distinguished the President, her beloved spouse. Aline, Julie's younger sister and really the daughter of the Bishop, possessed habits and defects and a character very unlike her sister's. She was the most youthful of the four, she had just become eighteen; she had a fetching, exuberantly healthy, and almost pert little countenance; a little turned-up nose; brown eyes full of expression and vivacity; a delicious mouth; a most shapely though somewhat tall figure, well-fleshed; the skin a bit dark but soft and fine; ass rather on the ample side but well-molded, a pair of the most voluptuous buttocks that ever a libertine eye may behold, the love mound brown-haired and pretty, the cunt a trifle low or, as they say, à l'anglaise, but as tight as one might wish, and when she was presented to the assembly she was thoroughly a maid. And she still was at the time the party we are to chronicle got under way, and we shall see in what manner her maidenhead was annihilated. As for the first fruits of her ass, the Bishop had been peacefully plucking them every day for the past eight years, but without, however, arousing in his dear daughter much of a taste for these exercises: she, despite her mischievous and randy air, only cooperated out of obedience and had never hinted that she shared the slightest pleasure in the infamies whose daily victim she was. The Bishop had left her in the most profound ignorance, scarcely did she know how to read or write, and she had absolutely no idea of religion's existence; her mind was natural, it was that of a child, she would give droll replies, she liked to play, she loved her sister a great deal, detested the Bishop out of all measure, and feared the Duc as she dreaded fire. On the wedding day, when she discovered herself naked and surrounded by the four men, she wept, and moreover did all that was asked of her, actin

nip said @ 2:36am GMT on 11th Jan succinct.

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:39pm GMT on 13th Jan [Score:-1 Overrated] g without pleasure as without ill-temper. She was sober, very clean, and having no other fault but that of laziness, nonchalance reigned in all her movements and doings and everywhere about her person, despite the liveliness announced by her bright eyes. She abhorred the President almost as much as she hated her uncle, and Durcet, who treated her with no excess of consideration, nevertheless seemed to be the only one for whom she appeared to have no repugnance. These were the eight principal characters in whose company we are going to enable you to live, good reader. It is now time to divulge the object of singular pleasures that were proposed. It is commonly accepted amongst authentic libertines that the sensations communicated by the organs of hearing are the most flattering and those impressions are the liveliest; as a consequence, our four villains, who were of a mind to have voluptuousness implant itself in the very core of their beings as deeply and as overwhelmingly as ever it could penetrate, had, to this end, devised something quite clever indeed. It was this: after having immured themselves within everything that was best able to satisfy the senses through lust, after having established this situation, the plan was to have described to them, in the greatest detail and in due order, every one of debauchery's extravagances, all its divagations, all its ramifications, all its contingencies, all of what is termed in libertine language its passions. There is simply no conceiving the degree to which man varies them when his imagination grows inflamed; excessive may be the differences between men that is created by all their other manias, by all their other tastes, but in this case it is even more so, and he who should succeed in isolating and categorizing and detailing these follies would perhaps perform one of the most splendid labors which might be undertaken in the study of manners, and perhaps one of the most interesting. It would thus be a question of finding some individuals capable of providing an account of all these excesses, then of analyzing them, of extending them, of itemizing them, of graduating them, and of running a story through it all, to provide coherence and amusement. Such was the decision adopted. After innumerable inquiries and investigations, they located four women who had attained their prime - that was necessary, experience was the fundamental thing here - four women, I say, who, having spent their lives in the most furious debauchery, had reached the state where they could provide an exact account of all these matters; and, as care had been taken to select four endowed with a certain eloquence and a fitting turn of mind, after much discussion, recording, and arranging, all four were ready to insert, each into the adventures of her life, all the most extraordinary vagaries of debauch, and to do so in such an order and at such a pace that the first, for example, would work into the tale of her life's activities the one hundred and fifty simple passions and the least esoteric or most ordinary deviations; the second, within the same framework, an equal number of more unusual passions involving one or more men with one or several women; the third was also to introduce into her narration one hundred and fifty of the most criminal whimsies and those which most outrage the laws of both Nature and religion; and as all these excesses lead to murder and as these murders committed through libertinage are infinitely various and are just as numerous as the occasions upon which the libertine's inflamed imagination adopts different tortures, the fourth was to adorn the events of her life with a meticulous report upon one hundred and fifty assorted examples of them. In the meantime, our libertines, surrounded, as at the outset I indicated, by their wives and also by other objects in every kind, were to pay close heed, were to be mentally heated, and were to end by extinguishing, by means of either their wives or those various objects, the conflagration the storytellers were to have lit. There is surely nothing more voluptuous in this project than the luxurious manner whereby it was carried out, and they are both this manner and these several recitations which are to compose this work; wherewith, having said this much, I advise the overmodest to lay my book aside at once if he would not be scandalized, for 'tis already clear there's not much of the chaste in our plan, and we dare hold ourselves answerable in advance that there'll be still less in its execution. Insomuch as the four actresses we have been speaking of play a most essential role in these memoirs, we believe, even were we to have to beg the reader's forgiveness therefor, we should still feel obliged to describe them; they will narrate, they will act: such being the case, is it possible that they remain unknown? Banish all expectation of beauties portrayed, although there were doubtless in the plans provisions for employing these four creatures physically as well as morally; be that as it may, neither their charms nor their years were the deciding factors, but rather their minds and their experience only that counted, and with what regards the latter, our friends could not possibly have made better choices. Madame Duclos was she to whom they entrusted the relating of the one hundred and fifty simple passions; the woman who went by this name was forty-eight years of age, still in fairly good condition and preserving the vestiges of beauty; she had very handsome eyes, an exceedingly fair skin, and one of the most splendid and plumpest asses that could ever favor your gaze; a mouth both clean and fresh, superb breasts, and pretty brown hair, a heavy figure but a noble one, and all the looks and tone of a brilliant whore. She had spent her life, as shall be observed, in places and under circumstances where indeed she had been obliged to study what she is going to relate, and to see her was to realize she must have gone to the task with wit and verve, with ease and interest. Madame Champville was a tall woman about fifty, slender, well made, having the most voluptuous quality in her look and bearing; a faithful devotee of Sappho, she had that kind of expression even in her slightest movements, in her simplest gestures, in her least words. She had ruined herself for the sake of keeping girls and, had it not been for this predilection to which she generally sacrified everything she was able to earn abroad, she might have been comfortably well to do. For a long time she had been in public service, and during recent years had been making her way as an outfitter in her turn, but had confined herself to a limited practice, her clients being reliable rakehells of a certain age; never did she receive young men, and this prudent conduct was lucrative and did something to improve her affairs. She had been blond, but a more venerable tint, and that of wisdom, was beginning to color her hair; her eyes were still exceedingly attractive, blue, and they contained a most agreeable expressiveness. Her mouth was lovely, still fresh, missing no teeth as yet, she was flat-chested but had a belly which was good, but had never aroused envy, her mound was rather prominent, and her clitoris protruded three inches when well warmed; tickle this part of her and one was certain to see her fly into an ecstasy in no time, and especially if the service was rendered by a female. Her ass was very flabby and worn from use, entirely soft, wrinkled, withered, and so toughened by the libidinous customs she in recounting her history will explain to us, that one could do everything one wished without her feeling anything there. One strange and assuredly very rare thing, above all in Paris: she was as much a maid on this side as a girl emerging from a convent, and perhaps, had it not been for the accursed part she put to use with people who cared for nothing but the extraordinary and whom, consequently, that side pleased, perhaps, I say, had it not been for that part, this singular virginity might have perished with her. Madame Martaine, a portly matron of fifty-two, very well preserved and very healthy and blessed with the biggest and most beautiful rump one could wish for, boasted the precise opposite by way of adventure. She had devoted her life to sodomitical debauch, and was so well familiarized therewith she tasted absolutely no joy save therefrom. A natural deformity (she had also been blessed with an obstruction) having prevented her from knowing any other, she had given herself over to this kind of pleasure, led to it both by her inability to do anything else and by early habit, in consideration of which she clung fast to this lubricity wherein 'twas declared she was yet delicious, ready to brave come what might, dreading nothing. The most monstrous engines were as naught to her, in fact such were the ones she preferred, and the sequel to these papers will perhaps reveal her still giving valorious fight beneath the standards of Sodom, as the most intrepid of buggresses. Her features were gracious enough, but signs of languor and of decline were beginning to mar her attractions, and but for the plumpness sustaining her yet, she might have been thought timeworn and frayed. As for Madame Desgranges, she was vice and lust personified; tall, thin, fifty-six, ghostly pale and emaciated, dead dull eyes, dead lips, she offered an image of crime about to perish for lack of strength. She had once upon a time been brunette, there were some who even maintained she'd had a beautiful body; not long thereafter it had become a mere skeleton capable of inspiring nothing but disgust. Her ass, withered, worn, marked, torn, more resembled marbled paper than human skin, and its hole was so gaping, sprung, and rugose that the bulkiest machines could, without her knowing a thing, penetrate it dry. By way of crowning graces, this generous Cytherean athlete, wounded in several combats, was missing one nipple and three fingers. She limped, and was without six teeth and an eye. We may perhaps learn by what order of attacks she had been so mistreated; but one thing is certain: nothing she had suffered had induced her to mend her ways, and if her body was the picture of ugliness, her was the depository of all the most unheard of vices and crimes: an arsonist, a parricade, a sodomite, a tribade, a murderess, a poisoner, guilty of incest, of rape, of theft, of abortions, and of sacrileges, one might truthfully affirm that there is not a single crime in the world this villain had not committed herself, or had others commit for her. Her present calling was procuring; she was one of society's most heavily titled furnishers, and as to much experience she joined a more or less agreeable prattle, she had been chosen to fill the role of fourth storyteller, that is to say, the one in whose story the greatest number of infamies and horrors were to be combined. Who better than a creature who had performed them all could have played this part? These women once found, and found in every article to be such as was desired, the friends turned their attentions to accessories. They had from the outset planned to surround themselves with a large number of lust- inspiring objects of either sex, but when it was brought to their attention that the only setting in which this lubricious roister could conveniently be held was that same château in Switzerland belonging to Durcet, the one in which he had dispatched little Elvire, when, I say, it was remarked that this château of only moderate size would not be able to lodge so great a throng of inhabitants, and that, what was more, it might well prove unwise or dangerous to bring along such a host, the list of subjects was trimmed to thirty-two in all, the storytellers included: to wit: four of that class, eight young girls, eight young boys, eight men endowed with monstrous members, for the delights of passive sodomy, and four female servants. But thoroughness went into the recruiting of all that; a year was devoted to these details, an enormous amount of money too, and these are the measures they employed to obtain the most delicious specimens of all France could offer in the way of eight little girls: sixteen intelligent procuresses, each accompanied by two lieutenants, were sent into the sixteen major provinces of France, while a seventeeth was occupied with the same work in Paris only. Each of these outfitters was given a rendezvous at one of the Duc's estates on the outskirts of Paris, and all of them were to appear there, during the same week, exactly ten months after the date of their departure - this was the period they were given for searching. Each was to bring back nine subjects, which came to a total of one hundred and fifty-three girls, from which one hundred and fifty-three a choice of only eight was to be made. The procuresses were instructed to emphasize high birth, virtuousness, and the most delicious visage possible; they were to conduct their researches so as to draw material chiefly from eminent families, and were not to hand over any girl without being able to prove that she had been forcibly abducted from either a convent housing pensionnaires of quality, or from the home of a family, and that a family of distinction. Whatever was not superior to the class of bourgeoisie, and what from these upper classes was not both very virtuous and wholly virgin and impeccably beautiful, would be refused without mercy; spies were posted to survey these women's proceedings and to supply the society with exhaustive and prompt reports of what they were doing. For each suitable subject found, they were paid thirty thousand francs, the agents assuming all expenses. The costs were incredible. With respect to age, it was fixed at from twelve to fifteen; anything above or between was pitilessly rejected. At the same time, under identical circumstances, with the same means, at the same expense, seventeen ages of sodomy likewise scoured the capital and the provinces in search of little boys, and their rendezvous was set for a month after the selection of the girls. As for the young men whom we propose henceforth to designate as fuckers, the size of the member was the sole criterion: nothing under ten or eleven inches long by seven or eight around was acceptable. Eight men labored throughout the kingdom to supply this demand, and their rendezvous was scheduled to fall a month after the little boys'. While the story of how these selections were made and received is not our foremost concern, it might not be inappropriate at this point to insert a word on the subject in order to bring out yet a little more of our four heroes' genius; it seems to me that nothing which serves to enlarge the reader's understanding of these figures and to shed light upon a party as extraordinary as the one we are going to describe, can be judged irrelevant. The time for the assembling of the little girls having arrived, everyone converged upon the Duc's estate. Some few procuresses having been unable to fill their quota of nine, some others having lost their charges en route, either by illness or flight, only one hundred and thirty of them were present at the rendezvous, but what charms, great God! never, I believe, have so many charms been seen gathered together in one place. Thirteen days were given over to this examination, and each day ten of them were inspected. The four friends gathered in a circle, and in its middle was placed the little girl, dressed as she had been seized; the procuress responsible for her capture recited her history. If something of the conditions of high birth or virtue were wanting, the inquiry went no deeper, the child was forthwith rejected, without appeal, and sent on her way, and the purveyor lost all that she had spent in connection with her. Next, having provided all the vital particulars, the procuress was asked to retire, and the child was interrogated in order to determine whether what had just been alleged were true. If all seemed well, the procuress was called in again, and she lifted the girl's skirts from behind, so as to expose her buttocks to the group; this was the first thing it wished to examine. The slightest defect in this part was grounds for immediate rejection; if on the contrary naught were amiss here, she was ordered to strip, or was stripped, and, naked, she passed and passed again, five or six times over, from one of our libertines to the other, she was turned about, she was turned the other way, she was fingered, she was handled, they sniffed, they spread, they peeped, they examined the state of the goods, was it new, was it used, but did all this coolly and without permitting the senses' illusion to upset any aspect of the examination. This done, the child was led away, and beside her name inscribed upon a ballot, the examiners wrote passed or failed and signed their names; these ballots were then dropped into a box, the voters refraining from communicating their opinions to one another; all the girls examined, the box was opened: in order to be accepted, a girl had to have our four friend's names in her favor. The absence of one name was enough to exclude her instantly and, in every instance, inexorably, as I have said: the unsuitable ones were kicked directly out, set at large, alone and without a guide, save when, as happened with perhaps a dozen, our liberines frolicked with them after the choices had been made and before turning them over to their procuresses. This round resulted in the exclusion of fifty candidates, the other eighty were gone over afresh, but with much greater exactitude and severity; the least defect warranted instantaneous dismissal. One, lovely as the day, was weeded out because one of her teeth grew a shade higher from the gum than the rest; more than twenty others were refused because they were daughters of nothing better than bourgeois. Thirty were eliminated during this second round, hence only fifty were left. The friends resolved not to continue to the third round until having first being relieved of some fuck through these fifty aspirants' own ministry, this in order that the senses' perfect calm could insure saner and sounder choice. Each of the quartet encompassed himself by a team of twelve or thirteen children; members of each team adopted varying attitudes, teams were shifted, everything was brought off with such dexterity, there was, in a word, so much lubricity in the doing that sperm flow, temperatures subsided, and another thirty disappeared from the race. Twenty remained; that was still a dozen too many. Further expedients to procure calm were resorted to, every means wherefrom one would suppose disgust could be born was employed, but the twenty still remained, and how might one have subtracted from a number of creatures so wonderfully celestial you would have declared they were the very work of a divinity? Equal in beauty, something else had to discovered which could at least award eight of them some kind of superiority over the twelve others, and what the President then proposed was worthy indeed of all the disorder of his mind. That made no difference; the suggestion was accepted: it had to do with finding out which of them would best do something the chosen eight would be often called upon to do. Four days sufficed amply to decide this question, and at last twelve were given their leave, but not blankly as in the case of the others; they provided a week's complete and exhaustive amusement, then were put into the keeping of the procuresses who soon made a pretty penny from the prostitution of creatures as distinguished as these. As for the successful eight, they were installed in a convent to keep until the day of departure, and in order to reserve until the designated period the pleasure of enjoying them, the four colleagues did not touch them before then. I'll not be so foolhardy as to attempt to describe these beauties: they were all of them superior in an equal degree: my brush strokes would necessarily be monotonous; I shall be content to give their names and to affirm that upon my word it is perfectly impossible to obtain an idea of such an assemblage of graces, of attractions, of perfections, and that had Nature wished to give Man an idea of what her greatest and wisest art can create, she would not have presented him with other models. The first was named Augustine: she was fifteen, the daughter of a Languedoc baron, and had been kidnaped from a convent in Montpellier. The second was named Fanny: she was the daughter of a counselor to the parliament of Brittany and had been abducted from her father's own château. The third was named Zelmire: she was fifteen years old, she was the Comte de Terville's daughter, and he idolized her. He had taken her hunting with him on one of his estates in Beauce and, having left her alone in the forest for a moment, she had been pounced upon at once. She was only a child and, with a dowry of four hundred thousand francs, was the following year to have married a very great lord. It was she who most wept and grieved at the horror of her fate. The fourth was named Sophie: she was fourteen and was the daughter of a rather well-to-do gentleman who lived on his estate in Berry. She had been seized while on a walk with her mother, who, seeking to defend her, was flung into a river, where she expired before her daughter's eyes. The fifth was named Colombe: she was from Paris, the child of a counselor to Parliament; she was thirteen and had been kidnaped while returning in the evening to her convent with a governess, after leaving a children's ball. The governess had been stabbed to death. The sixth was named Hebe: she was just twelve, the daughter of a cavalry captain, a nobleman who lived in Orleans. The youngster had been enticed and carried away from the convent where she was being brought up; two nuns had been bought. You could not hope to find anything more seductive or sweeter. The seventh was named Rosette: she was thirteen and was the child of the Lieutenant-General of Chalon-sur-Saône. Her father had just died, she was with her mother in the countryside near the city, and was captured within sight of her relatives by agents disguised as thieves. The last was named Mimi or Michette: she was twelve, she was the daughter of the Marquis de Senanges and had been kidnaped on her father's estate in the Bourbonnais while on a carriage drive which she had been allowed to take with two or three women from the château. The women were murdered. It will be remarked that the preparations for these revels cost much money and many crimes; to such people, treasure means exceedingly little, and as for crime, one was then living in an age when it was not by any means probed and punished the way it is nowadays. Hence everything succeeded, and so prettily that, the inquests amounting to virtually nothing at all, our libertines were never troubled by consequences. The time drew nigh for the examination of the little boys. Easier to obtain, their number was greater. The pimps produced one hundred and fifty of them, and it will surely be no exaggeration if I affirm that they at least equaled the little girls, as much in their innocence, and their elevated rank. Thirty thousand francs were paid for each of them, the same sum given for the girls, but the entrepreneurs risked nothing, because this game being more delicate and far more to the taste of our epicures, it had been decided that no one would be put in danger of losing his expenses, that while the lads with whom it was impossible to come to terms would be rejected, as they would be put to some use they would also be paid for. Their examination was conducted like that of the girls, ten were verified each day, but with the very wise precaution which had been a little too much neglected with the girls, with the precaution, I say, of always preceding the examination by a discharge arranged with the aid of the ten who were under present scrutiny. The others were half of a mind to bar the President from the ceremony, they were wary of the depravation of his tastes; they had feared, in the selection of the girls, being made the dupes of his accursed predilection for infamy and degradation: he promised to keep himself in check, and if he kept his word, it is unlikely he did so without difficulty, for when once a damaged or diseased imagination becomes accustomed to these species of outrages against good taste and Nature, outrages which so deliciously flatter it, it is no easy matter to restore such a person to the path of righteousness: it seems as if the desire to satisfy his longing displaces reason in his judgements. Scorning what is truly beautiful, no longer cherishing but what is frightful, desire's pronouncements correspond to its criteria, and the return to truer sentiments would appear to him to be a wrong done those principles whence he should be most sorry to stray. One hundred hopefuls were found unanimously approved when the initial seances were over, and these decisions had to be five times reconsidered in order to arrive at the small group alone to be accepted. Thrice in succession fifty survived the balloting, and then, to reduce that number to the stipulated eight, the jurors were compelled to resort to unusual measures in order somehow to lessen the appeal of idols still glamorous despite everything they had been able to do to them. The idea occurred to them to dress the boys as girls: twenty-five were eliminated by this trick which, lending to a sex they worshiped the garb of one to which they had become indifferent, depreciated their value and ruined almost all the illusion. But nothing could alter the voting on the twenty-five that were left. 'Twas all in vain, in vain they spattered their fuck about, in vain they wrote their names upon the ballots at the same moment they discharged, in vain they put to use the expedient adopted with the little girls, the twenty-five proved irreducible every time, and at last they agreed to have them draw lots. Here are the names they gave the lucky ones who remained, their age, their birth, and a word or two about their adventures; their portraits? I cry off: Cupid's own features were surely no more delicate, and the models Albani sought from which to choose traits for his divine angels must certainly have been inferior by far. Zelamir was thirteen years old: he was the only son of a gentleman out of Poitou who had been bringing him up with the greatest care. Escorted by a single domestic, he had been sent to Poitiers to visit a kinsman; our rogues ambushed them, slew the domestic, and made off with the child. Cupidon was the same age: he had been a pupil in a school at La Flèche, and was the son of a gentleman dwelling in the vicinity of that town. A trap was laid for the boy, he was kidnaped while on an outing the students used to take on Sundays. He was the prettiest pupil in the entire collège. Narcisse was twelve; he was a Knight of Malta. He had been abducted in Rouen, where his father filled an honorable post compatible with his nobility; the boy was en route to the Collège de Louis-le-Grand at Paris, he was waylaid and seized while on the road. Zephyr, the most delicious of the eight, it being supposed that their excessive beauty might allow the possibility of a choice, was from Paris; he was pursuing his studies there, in a famous pension. His father, a ranking officer, did all in his power to get his son back, and failed; money had seduced the headmaster of the school, who delivered seven specimens, of whom six were refused. Zephyr had set the Duc's head to spinning, and the latter protested that were it to have cost a million to bugger the boy he would have paid it in cash on the spot. He reserved to himself the lad's initiation, and it was generally granted him. O tender and delicate child, what disproportion and what a dreadful fate were in store for you! Celadon was the son of a magistrate of Nancy; he was captured at Luneville, whither he had gone to visit his aunt. He had just attained his fourteenth year. In this case a girl was used to bait the trap. Celadon and she were introduced, the little wench drew him into the snare by feigning love for him; he was negligently chaperoned, the stroke was successful. Adonis was fifteen; he was ravished at Plessis, where he was enrolled in school. He was the son of a judge of the assize courts who raised a great hue and cry, but all to no avail, the capture had been so nicely planned no one knew a thing about it. Curval, who had been mad about the child for two years, had made his acquaintance at his father's house, and it was he who had supplied the means and information necessary to debauch him. The others were greatly surprised to find such sensible good taste in a head so depraved as Curval's, and he, most proud, profited from the event to show his colleagues that, as was plainly to be seen, he still could boast a sometimes fine palate. The child recognized him and fell to weeping, but the President consoled him with the assurance it would be to him would befall the deflowering, and while uttering these comforting words, he wobbled his enormous engine against those frail little buttocks. Curval asked the assembly for the boy; his request was unopposed. Hyacinthe was fourteen years old; he was the son of a retired officer living in a small city in Champagne. He adored hunting and was taken while afield, his father having been so imprudent as to allow him to set out alone. Giton was twelve; he was kidnaped at Versailles from amidst of the page boys at the King's stables. He was the son of a man of consequence from the Nivernais, who not six months prior had brought him to Versailles. He was very simply abducted while walking alone on the avenue de Saint- Cloud. He became the Bishop's passion, and to the Bishop was the prize decreed. Those, thus, were the masculine deities our libertines prepared for their lubricity; we will see in due time and place the use to which they were put. One hundred and forty-two subjects remained, but whereas there had been much trifling over the eight, there was none with this game: not one of the defeated candidates was dismissed until he had served some purpose. Our libertines spent a month with them at the Duc's château. As they were on the eve of setting forth, as all the practical arrangements were completed, the company had little else to do but amuse itself until the day of departure. When at last they were thoroughly fed up with their sport, they fell upon a pleasant means for disposing of what had provided it: that was to sell the boys to a Turkish pirate, a scheme whereby no trace of them would be left and a part of the costs would be recovered. They were sent in small groups to a place near Monaco, the Turk came to get them and lead them off into slavery, doubtless a dreadful fate, but one whereby, none the less, our four villains were hugely entertained. And now came the moment of choosing the fuckers. Those of this class who failed to meet the standards were the cause of no embarrasment; being mature and reasonable men, it was enough to pay them for their trouble, their traveling expenses, and send them home. The eight experts who had contracted to furnish the fuckers had, furthermore, many fewer obstacles to surmount, since the specifications were by and large concrete and the conditions made no difference at all. Thus it was fifty came to the rendezvous; from amongst the twenty biggest, the eight youngest and most attractive were singled out, and since in the sequel mention will almost never be made save of the four biggest of the eight, I shall restrict myself to naming these. Hercule, with a body hewn in the image of the god whose name he had been given, was twenty-six years of age and was endowed with a member eight and one-quarter inches around by thirteen long. Nothing more beautiful nor more majestic has ever been seen; this tool was almost always upright, and with only eight discharges, so tests revealed, it could fill a pint measure to the brim. Hercule was also very gentle, very sweet, and had an interesting countenance. Antinoüs, so named because, like Hadrian's favourite, he had, together with the world's prettiest prick, its most voluptuous ass, and that exceedingly rare. Antinoüs wielded a device measuring eight inches in circumference and twelve in length. He was thirty and had a face worthy of his other features. Bum-Cleaver lugged a club so amusingly shaped it was nearly impossible for him to perform an embuggery without splitting the ass, whence came the name he bore. The head of his prick resembled the heart of an ox, it was eight and three-eights inches around; behind it, the shaft measured only eight, but was crooked and had such a curve it neatly tore the anus when penetrating it, and this quality, very precious to libertines as jaded as ours, had made him singularly sought after. Invictus, so named because, no matter what he did, his erection was perpetual, was furnished with an engine eleven inches long and seven and fifteen-sixteenths inches around. Greater ones, who had difficulty stiffening, had been turned away to make room for him who, regardless of the quantity of discharges he produced in a day, rose heavenward at the slightest touch. The other four were of about the same dimensions and the same shape. The forty-two rejected candidates provided a fortnight's entertainment and, after the friends had put them through their paces and worn them to the bone, they were well rewarded and bidden adieu. Nothing now remained but the choice of the four ladies-in-waiting, and this final stage was without doubt the most picturesque. The President was not the only one whose tastes were depraved; his three friends, and especially Durcet, were indeed a little tainted by his accursed, crapulous, and debauched mania which causes one to find a greater, more piquant attraction in an old, disgusting, and filthy object than in what Nature has fashioned most divinely. Explaining this fancy would probably be difficult, but it exists in many people; Nature's disorder carries with it a kind of sting which operates upon the high-keyed sort with perhaps as much and even more force than do her most regular beauties; it has been proven, moreover, that when one's prick is aloft, it is horror, villainy, the appalling, that pleases; well, where are they more emphatically present than in a vitiated object? If 'tis the filthy thing which pleases in the lubricious act, then certainly the more filthy the thing, the more it should please, and it is surely much filthier in the corrupted than in the intact and perfect object. No, as to that there's no doubt. Furthermore, beauty belongs to the sphere of the simple, the ordinary, whilst ugliness is something extraordinary, and there is no question but that every ardent imagination prefers in lubricity the extraordinary to the commonplace. Beauty, health never strike one save in a simple way; ugliness, degradation deal a far stouter blow, the commotion they create is much stronger, the resultant agitation must hence be more lively; in the light of all this, there should be no cause for astonishment in the fact that an immense crowd of people prefer to take their pleasure with an aged, ugly, and even stinking crone and will refuse a fresh and pretty girl, no more reason to be astonished by that, I say, than at a man who for his promenades prefers the mountains' arid and rugged terrain to the monotonous pathways of the plains. All these matters depend upon our tastes in this connection than it is in our power to alter the form of our bodies. Be that as it may, such, as I have said, was the dominating taste of the President and, to tell the truth, the taste which came near to predominating in his three confreres, for when it came to choosing female servants, their views were identical, and we are about to see from this choice that its making bespoke the constitutional disorder and depraviation to which we have just alluded. The most painstaking search was initiated in Paris; the four creatures needed were finally located; however loathsome may be their portraits, the reader will none the less permit me to draw them: that I do so is essential to that aspect of manners the elucidation of which is one of the principal aims of this work. Marie was the name of the first one; she had been servant of a notorious brigand quite recently put to death on the wheel, whipping and branding had been her penalty. She was fifty-eight years old, had almost no hair left, her nose stood askew, her eyes were dull and rheumy, her mouth large and filled with her thirty-two teeth, yes, they were all there, but all were yellow as sulphur; she was tall, raw-boned, having whelped fourteen children, all fourteen of whom, said she, she'd strangled from fear they'd turn out ne'er-do-wells. Her belly rippled like the waves of the sea, and one of her buttocks was devoured by an abscess. The second was known as Louison; she was sixty, stunted, hunchbacked, blind in one eye, and lame, but she had a fine ass for her age and her skin was still in fairly good repair. She was as wicked as the devil and forever ready to commit any horror and every extravagance one could possibly demand of her. Therèse was sixty-two; she was tall, thin, looked like a skeleton, not a hair was left on her head, not a tooth in her mouth, and from this opening in her body she exhaled an odor capable of flooring any bystander. Her ass was peppered with wounds, and her buttocks were so prodigiously slack one could have furled the skin around a walking stick; the hole in this splendid ass resembled the crater of a volcano what for width, and for aroma the pit of a privy; in all her life, Therèse declared, she had never once wiped her ass, whence we have proof positive that the shit of her infancy yet clung there. As for her vagina, it was the receptacle of everything ungodly, of every horror, a veritable sepulcher whose fetidity was enough to make you faint away. She had one twisted arm and limped in one leg. The fourth was called Fanchon; six times she had been hanged in effigy, and not a crime exists in this world she had not committed. She was sixty-nine, she was flat-nosed, short, and heavy; she squinted, had almost no forehead, had nothing but two old teeth in her stinking maw, and they were ready to fall out, an erysipelas blazed all over her ass and hemorrhoids the size of your fist hung from her anus, a frightful chancre consumed her vagina, and one of her thighs had been entirely burned. She was dead drunk three-quarters of the year, and in that condition, her stomach being very weak, she vomited over everything. Despite the batch fo hemorrhoids adorning it, her asshole was naturally so large that all unawares she blew driblets and farts and often more besides. Apart from acting as servants in the luxurious recreation palace the four friends had in mind, these women were also to lend a hand at all the convocations and render all the lubricious services and ministrations that might be required of them. As soon as all these matters had been decided and the summer having already begun, they turned their thoughts to the transporting of the various objects which were, during the four months' sojourn on Durcet's estate, to render its inhabitation comfortable and agreeable. A vast store of furniture and mirrors, of viands and wines and liqueurs of all kinds were ordered borne thither, workmen were sent there, and little by little the numerous subjects were conducted to the château where Durcet, who had gone ahead, received, lodged, and established them as they arrived. But the moment has come to give the reader a description of the renowned temple appointed for so many luxurious sacrifices throughout the projected four-month season. He will observe with what great care they had chosen a remote and isolated retreat, as if silence, distance, and stillness were libertinage's potent vehicles, and as if everything which through these qualities instills a religious terror in the senses had necessarily and evidently to bestow additional charm upon lust. We are going to picture this retreat not as once it was, but in the state of embellishment and yet more perfect solitude that resulted from our four friends' efforts. To reach the place one had first to get to Basel; at that city you crossed the Rhine, beyond which the road became steadily narrower until you had to abandon your carriage. Soon afterward you entered the Black Forest, you plunged about fifteen leagues into it, ascended a difficult, tortuous road that, without a guide, would be absolutely impracticable. By and by you caught sight of a sinister and mean hamlet of charcoal burners and gamekeepers; there began the territory Durcet owned, and the hamlet was his; as this little village's population was composed almost entirely of thieves or smugglers, Durcet easily befriended it, and his first order to the inhabitants was expressly to enjoin them under no circumstances to allow anyone whomsoever to pass on toward the château after the 1st of November, the date by which the entire society was to be assembled in it. He distributed weapons to his faithful vassals, granted them certain privileges they had been long soliciting, and the barrier was lowered. That done, and the gates tightly sealed, one will see by the following description how difficult of access was Silling, the name Durcet's châteu bore. Having passed the village, you begin to scale a mountain almost as high as the Saint-Bernard and infinitely more difficult to ascend, for the only way to reach the summit is by foot; not that the route is forbidden to pack mules, but such are the precipices which everywhere border the one so very narrow path that must be followed, that you run the greatest danger if you ride; six of the mules used to transport supplies and food perished, taking with them two laborers who had though to mount astride them. Five full hours are required to reach the top of the mountain, and there you come upon another extraordinary feature which, owing to the precautions that had been taken, became a new barrier so insurmountable that none but birds might have overcome it: the topographical accident we refer to is a crevice above sixty yards wide which splits the crest into northern and southern parts, with the result that, after having climbed up the mountain, it is impossible, without great skill, to go back down it. Durcet had united these two parts, between which a precipice fell to the depth of a thousand feet and more, by a fine wooden bridge which was destroyed immediately the last of the crew had arrived, and from this moment on, all possibility of communicating with the Château of Silling ceased. For, cross the bridge and you come down into a little plain about four acres in area; the plain is surrounded on all sides by sheer crags rising to the clouds, crags which envelop the plain within a faultless screen. The passage known as the bridge path is hence the only one by which you may descend into or communicate with the little plain; the bridge removed or destroyed, there is not on this earth a single being, of no matter what species you may imagine, capable of gaining this small plot of level land. And it is in the center of this flat space so well surrounded, so solidly protected, that one finds Durcet's château. Yet another wall, thirty feet high, girds it; beyond the wall a moat filled with water and exceedingly deep defends a last tall and winding enclosure; a low and strait postern finally leads into the great inner court around which all the living quarters are built, and they are very capacious, very well furnished thanks to the arrangements latterly concluded; one discovers a long gallery on the first floor. I would have it remarked that the description I am about to give of the apartments corresponds not to what in former times they may have been, but to the manner in which they had just been rearranged and distributed in accordance with our libertines' common conception. From the gallery you moved into a very attractive dining hall provided with buffets shaped like towers which, communicating with the kitchen, made it possible to serve the company its food hot, promptly, and without the help of any waiters. From this dining hall, hung in tapestries, warmed by heating devices, furnished with ottomans, with excellent armchairs, and with everything which could make it both comfortable and pleasing to the eye, you passed into a large living room or salon, simple, plain, but exceedingly warm and equipped with the very best furniture; adjacent to this room was an assembly chamber intended for the storytellers' narrations. This was, so to speak, the lists for the projected jousts, the seat of the lubricious conclaves, and as it had been decorated accordingly, it merits something by way of a special description. Its shape was semicircular; set into the curving wall were four niches whose surfaces were faced with large mirrors, and each was provided with an excellent ottoman; these four recesses were so constructed that each faced the center of the circle; the diameter was formed by a throne, raised four feet above the floor and with its back to the flat wall, and it was intended for the storyteller; in this position she was not only well before the four niches intended for her auditors, but, the circle being small, was close enough to them to insure their hearing every word she said, for she was placed like an actor in a theater, and the audience in their niches found themselves situated as if observing a spectacle in an amphitheater. Steps led down from the throne, upon them were to sit the objects of debauchery brought in to soothe any sensory irritation provoked by the recitals; these several tiers, like the throne, were upholstered in black velvet edged with gold fringe, and the niches were furnished with similar and likewise enriched material, but in color dark blue. At the back of each niche was a little door leading into an adjoining closet which was to be used at times when, having summoned the desired subject from the steps, one preferred not to execute before everyone the delight for whose execution one had summoned that subject. These closets were provided with couches and with all the other furnishing required for every kind of impurity. On either side of the central throne an isolated column rose to the ceiling; these two columns were designed to support the subject in whom some misconduct might merit correction. All the instruments necessary to meting it out hung from hooks attached to the columns, and this imposing sight served to maintain the subordination so indispensable to parties of this nature, a subordination whence is born almost all the charm of the voluptuousness in persecutors' souls. One could walk from this semicircular room directly to a chamber which formed the end of this part of the living quarters. This chamber was a kind of boudoir, it was soundproof and secluded, but very warm within, very dark during the day, and its purpose was for private interviews and secluded contests, or for certain other secret delights which will be unveiled in the sequel. To reach the other wing, one had to retrace one's footsteps, and once in the gallery, at the end of which an exceedingly handsome chapel was visible, one entered the opposite wing which completed the circuit of the inner courtyard. You discovered a splendid antechamber adjoined by four superb apartments, each having a boudoir and wash cabinets; splendid Turkish beds canopied in three-colored damask with matching furniture adorned these suites whose boudoirs offered everything and more of the most sensual that lubricity might fancy. These four units, exceptionally well- heated and comfortable, were intended for the four colleagues, who were perfectly lodged therein. In that the protocols stipulated that their wives were to occupy the same quarters, no separate space was set aside for them. Upstairs, the second story contained about the same number of apartments, but they were otherwise divided; you first came upon, to one side, a vast room bordered by eight niches, each having a little bed - these were the girls' quarters, and beside them were two small chambers for the old women who were to have charge of them. Further along, a pair of pretty rooms had been set aside for two of the storytellers. Now turning about and going in the other direction, you found a similar eight-niched room for the little boys; by it were two rooms for the duennas appointed to supervise them; and beyond these were two more rooms, also alike, for the two storytellers. Eight cheerful rooms, as fine as anything you have yet seen, formed the eight fuckers' quarter, although these individuals were destined to do very little sleeping in their own beds. Below, on the ground floor, were the kitchens and, near them, six small chambers for the six persons to whom the preparation of food had been confided; amongst them were three cooks renowned for their art; they were all females, women having been preferred for a pleasure outing like this one, and I believe the decision was just. The cooks were assisted by three robust young scullery maids, but none of the kitchen staff was to appear at the revels, that was not its purpose, and if the rules imposed in this connection were violated, 'tis merely because libertinage stops at nothing, and the true way of extending and multiplying one's desires is to attempt to impose checks upon them. One of these three underlings was to look after the numerous livestock which had been fetched to the château - with the exception of the four aged ladies who were meant for household duties, there were no domestics save for these three cooks and their seconds. But depravity, cruelty, disgust, infamy, all those passions anticipated or experienced, had erected another locality whereof it is a matter of urgency that we give the sketch, for the laws essential to the proper unfolding of our tale demand that we depict it with thoroughness now. A fatal stone there was which, cunningly made, could be raised from below the step of the altar in the little Christian temple we discerned from the gallery; beneath that stone one beheld a spiral stairway, very narrow and very steep, whose three hundred steps could convey you down into the bowels of the earth, to a kind of vaulted dungeon, closed by triple doors of iron, and in which was displayed everything the cruelest art and the most refined barbarity could invent of the most atrocious, as much for gripping one with terror as for proceeding to horrors. And there below, what tranquillity! to what degree might not the villain be reassured who brought his victim there! What had he to fear? He was out of France, in a safe province, in the depths of an uninhabitable forest, within this forest in a redoubt which, owing to the measures he had taken, only the birds of the air could approach, and he was in the depth of the earth's entrails. Woe, a hundred times woe to the unlucky creature who in the midst of such abandonment were to find himself at the mercy of a villain lawless and without religion, whom crime amused, and whose only interest lay in his passions, who heeded naught, had nothing to obey but the imperious decrees of his perfidious lusts. I know not what will transpire in that nether place, but this I may say without doing our tale a disservice, that when a description of the dungeon was given the Duc, he reacted by discharging three times in succession. Everything being ready at last, everything perfectly disposed, the subjects installed, the Duc, the Bishop, Curval, and their wives, with the four second-ranking fuckers in their train, set off (Durcet and his wife, together with all the rest, having arrived beforehand, as we have previously noted), and not without infinite difficulty, finally reached the château on the evening of the 29th of October. Immediately they crossed it, Durcet had the bridge cut. But that was not all: having inspected the place, the Duc decided that, since all the provisions were within the fortress, and since therefore they had no need to leave it, it were necessary, in order to forestall external attack, which was little dreaded, and escapes from within, the possibilities of which were less unlikely, it were necessary, I say, to have walled shut all the gates, all the passages whereby the château might be penetrated, and absolutely to enclose themselves inside their retreat as within a besieged citadel, without leaving the least entrance to an enemy, the least egress to a deserter. The recommendation was put into effect, they barricaded themselves to such an extent there was no longer any trace left of where the exits had been; and then they settled down comfortably inside. After the provisions we have just cited had been taken, the two days still remaining before the 1st of November were devoted to resting the subjects, that they might make a fresh appearance at the scenes of debauchery soon to begin, and during this interval the four friends labored over a code of laws which, as soon as it was brought to perfection and signed, was promulgated to those concerned. Before advancing to the matter, it is essential that these articles of government be made known to the reader who, after the exact description we have given him of everything, will now have no more to do than follow the story, lightly and voluptuously, his mind impeded by nothing, his memory embarrassed by no unexpected intrusions. STATUTES The company shall rise every day at ten o'clock in the morning, at which time the four fuckers who have not been in duty during the night shall come to pay the friends a visit and shall each bring a little boy; they shall pass from one bedchamber to another, successively. They shall perform as bidden by the friends' likings and desires, but during the preliminaries the little boys shall serve only as a tempting prospect, for it has been decided and planned that the eight maidenheads of the little girls' cunts shall remain intact until the month of December, and their asses shall likewise remain in bond, as shall the asses of the eight little boys, until the month of January, at which times the respective seals shall be broken, and this in order to allow voluptuousness to become irritated by the augmentation of a desire incessantly inflamed and never satisfied, a state which must necessarily lead to that certain lascivious fury the friends shall strive to provoke, considering it one of lubricity's most highly delectable situations. At eleven o'clock, the friends shall repair to the quarters appointed for the little girls. In that place will be served breakfast consisting of chocolate, or of roasts cooked in Spanish wine, or of other appropriate restoratives. This breakfast shall be served by the eight little girls, naked, aided by the two elders, Marie and Louison, assigned to the seraglio of girls, the other two elders being assigned to that of the boys. If, during this breakfast, the friends are moved to commit impudicities with the little girls, before or after, the latter shall lend themselves thereunto with the resignation prescribed to them, and wherein they shall not be found wanting without severe punishment being the consequence. But it is agreed that at this hour there shall be undertaken no secret or private exercises, and that if a moment's wantonizing be desired, it shall be conducted openly and before the public present at the morning meal. These little girls shall adopt the general custom of kneeling at all times whenever they see or meet a friend, and they shall remain thus until told to stand; they, the wives, and the elders shall alone be subject to these regulations, wherefrom the others are dispensed, but everyone shall be bound never to address the friends save as my Lord. Before leaving the girls' apartments, that one of the friends who is invested with the month's stewardship (it being intended that for the space of a month one friend shall be in general supervision of everything, each friend acceding to the office in his turn and in the following order: Durcet during November, the Bishop during December, the President during January, the Duc during February), he, then, who is the month's presiding officer, before leaving the girls' quarters, shall inspect them all, to determine whether they are in the state wherein they have been instructed to maintain themselves, whereof the elders shall be each morning apprised and which will be determined by the need that exists for them to keep in such and such a state. As it is strictly forbidden to relieve oneself anywhere save in the chapel, which has been outfitted and intended for this purpose, and forbidden to go there without individial and special permission, the which shall be often refused, and for good reason, the month's presiding officer shall scrupulously examine, immediately after breakfast, all the girls' water closets, and in the case of a contravention discovered in the one above-designated place or in the other, the delinquent shall be condemned to suffer the penalty of death. The friends shall move from there into the little boys' apartments in order to perform the same inspections and similarly to pronounce capital punishment against offenders. The four little boys who have not been that morning with the friends, shall now receive them when they enter their chamber and shall untrouser themselves before them, the other four shall remain standing in attention, awaiting the orders which are given them. Messieurs may or may not indulge in lewd byplay with the four they have not until now seen during the day, but whatever they do shall be done publicly; no intimate commerce shall be held at this hour. At one o'clock, those of the girls or the boys, of mature and of young years, who have obtained permission to satisfy urgent needs, that is to say, the heavier sort, and this permission shall never be put most sparingly accorded, and at the most to a third of the subjects, those, we repeat, shall betake themselves to the chapel where everything has been artistically arranged for the voluptuous delights falling under this head. In this place they will find the four friends who shall wait for them until two o'clock and never any longer, and who shall distribute and adjust them as they judge proper to the delights of this order which they may be moved to taste. From two to three the first two tables shall be served: they shall dine simultaneously, one in the girls' large apartment, the other in that of the young boys: the three kitchen servants shall serve these two tables. At the first shall sit the eight little girls and the four elders; at the second the four wives, the eight little boys, and the four storytellers. During their meal, Messieurs will be pleased to gather in the living room where they will chat together until three o'clock. Just before this hour, the eight fuckers shall make their appearance here, as well clothed and as well adorned as it is in their power to be. At three shall be served the masters' dinner, and the honor to be present there shall be enjoyed by none but the eight fuckers; this meal shall be served by the four wives, entirely naked, aided by the four elders, clad as sorceresses; to the latter shall fall the task of bringing the plates from the towers into which the servants, on the other side, shall have put them, and the plates shall be handed to wives, who shall deposit them on the table. The eight fuckers, in the course of the dinner, will be at liberty to handle and touch the unclothed bodies of the wives in whatever manner and to whatever extent they please, without the said wives being permitted to refuse or defend themselves; the fuckers will even be able to go to the point of employing insults and of thickening their sticks by apostrophizing them with all the invectives they may see fit to pronounce. The friends shall rise from the table at five, at which time these Messieurs only (the fuckers shall retire until the hour of general assembly), these Messieurs only, I say, shall pass into the salon, where two little boys and two little girls, who shall be changed daily, shall, in a state of nudity, serve them coffee and liqueur; nor shall it be at this point in the day's activities Messieurs shall permit themselves diversions which might enervate them; conversation shall be limited to simple jesting.

EPT said @ 11:54am GMT on 23rd Jan Do you have anything by Bathory?

Chop-Logik said @ 9:00pm GMT on 27th Feb don't encourage him...

Fenny said @ 2:03am GMT on 28th Feb yea, what dribblenose said...

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:58am GMT on 10th Jan test

Rojo^ said @ 10:40am GMT on 10th Jan I like pussy.

sherlock said @ 5:32am GMT on 11th Jan Waaaaaaaaaaah???

whatfor said @ 7:52am GMT on 11th Jan Damn! I wish I could think of something random to say...

max_damage78 said @ 9:14am GMT on 11th Jan I was spankin my monkey, then it bit me. FUCKING MONKEY!!!

Dna01 said @ 6:55pm GMT on 13th Jan good god this is a huge non-post... no, there's no sick-me sign... it's my Insanity of the FEET!!

Dna01 said @ 6:56pm GMT on 13th Jan good god this is a huge non-post... no, there's no kick-me sign... it's my Insanity of the FEET!!

vlimp said @ 1:41am GMT on 14th Jan oh my...

Chop-Logik said @ 9:12pm GMT on 14th Jan [Score:1 Insightful] I should mention that whenever someone comments on this entry, matt gets an email about it. Act accordingly ;)

Neo Kojiro said @ 2:39am GMT on 17th Mar I like swords.

Trigger said @ 9:49am GMT on 11th May I like teh Shineys

Mr. Langosta said @ 5:15am GMT on 16th Jan I'm Henry the Eighth I am! Henry the Eight I am I am! (everybody sing)

Vampire_X said @ 6:09am GMT on 25th Mar ...no

f00m said @ 6:29am GMT on 17th Jan PENIS

sensibleb said @ 7:43am GMT on 17th Jan I'm awed by it's wee-ness.

f00m said @ 2:35am GMT on 18th Jan HI MATT :)

f00m said @ 2:36am GMT on 18th Jan testing

letoofdune said @ 1:01am GMT on 20th Jan

letoofdune said @ 1:01am GMT on 20th Jan

letoofdune said @ 1:01am GMT on 20th Jan

palomer said @ 11:06pm GMT on 30th Jan www.eh.com

Chop-Logik said @ 12:39am GMT on 1st Feb --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- S0RRY, WE C0ULD N0T FIND T3H PR0N j00 R L00Kz0rING FORS ^__^ KEKEKEKEKE ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chop-Logik said @ 12:39am GMT on 1st Feb --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- S0RRY, WE C0ULD N0T FIND T3H PR0N j00 R L00Kz0rING FORS ^__^ KEKEKEKEKE ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

sensibleb said @ 12:57am GMT on 1st Feb Dude. Sleep. Seriously.

Chop-Logik said @ 10:49pm GMT on 1st Feb NEVAR

Thathurt said @ 1:40pm GMT on 7th Feb HOOOOOOOOOOOOOLEEEEEEEEEE DOG SHIT

Nick said @ 11:27am GMT on 14th Feb Why?

fhufi said @ 12:46pm GMT on 19th Feb

fhufi said @ 12:50pm GMT on 19th Feb [img]http://www.danasoft.com/ssig.jpg[/img]

Vampire_X said @ 4:57am GMT on 20th Apr mwahahahaahah!! puny msgboard code user!

fuct4lyfe said @ 2:03pm GMT on 23rd Feb I finally found it.

ebuvor said @ 7:52pm GMT on 23rd Feb there's an entire novella in here...

Ifrit said @ 8:55pm GMT on 23rd Feb Holy shit! I don't know what this page is all about, but if I found it, it must mean I'm soon to be a ChoSEn one! OMG! I'm going to go celebrate with lots of booze and sex! OMG! Holy shit this is cool! Yeah....

tomecat said @ 12:59am GMT on 24th Feb Ah man. Mess with me when I'm fucked up. Through the looking glass.

felix said @ 12:00pm GMT on 27th Feb ...

letoofdune said @ 1:55pm GMT on 27th Feb I agree.

Sean said @ 4:17pm GMT on 1st Dec Testing something; figured I might as well do it in this thread...

LordFeldo said @ 5:37pm GMT on 3rd Mar I just came.

racerx said @ 2:19am GMT on 8th Mar The whole thing, I think, is sick.

testing said @ 2:08pm GMT on 8th Mar testing

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:27am GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 1 of 1189 Genesis 1 1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 2 The earth was without form and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep; and the Spirit of God was moving over the face of the waters. 3 And God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light. 4 And God saw that the light was good; and God separated the light from the darkness. 5 God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And there was evening and there was morning, one day. 6 And God said, "Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it separate the waters from the waters." 7 And God made the firmament and separated the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament. And it was so. 8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And there was evening and there was morning, a second day. 9 And God said, "Let the waters under the heavens be gathered together into one place, and let the dry land appear." And it was so. 10 God called the dry land Earth, and the waters that were gathered together he called Seas. And God saw that it was good. 11 And God said, "Let the earth put forth vegetation, plants yielding seed, and fruit trees bearing fruit in which is their seed, each according to its kind, upon the earth." And it was so. 12 The earth brought forth vegetation, plants yielding seed according to their own kinds, and trees bearing fruit in which is their seed, each according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. 13 And there was evening and there was morning, a third day. 14 And God said, "Let there be lights in the firmament of the heavens to separate the day from the night; and let them be for signs and for seasons and for days and years, 15 and let them be lights in the firmament of the heavens to give light upon the earth." And it was so. 16 And God made the two great lights, the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night; he made the stars also. 17 And God set them in the firmament of the heavens to give light upon the earth, 18 to rule over the day and over the night, and to separate the light from the darkness. And God saw that it was good. 19 And there was evening and there was morning, a fourth day. 20 And God said, "Let the waters bring forth swarms of living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the firmament of the heavens." 21 So God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that moves, with which the waters swarm, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. 22 And God blessed them, saying, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the waters in the seas, and let birds multiply on the earth." 23 And there was evening and there was morning, a fifth day. 24 And God said, "Let the earth bring forth living creatures according to their kinds: cattle and creeping things and beasts of the earth according to their kinds." And it was so. 25 And God made the beasts of the earth according to their kinds and the cattle according to their kinds, and everything that creeps upon the ground according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. 26 Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, after our likeness; and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps upon the earth." 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. 28 And God blessed them, and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the air and over every living thing that moves upon the earth." 29 And God said, "Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit; you shall have them for food. 30 And to every beast of the earth, and to every bird of the air, and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life, I have given every green plant for food." And it was so. 31 And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, a sixth day.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:32am GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 2 of 1189 Genesis 2 1 Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them. 2 And on the seventh day God finished his work which he had done, and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had done. 3 So God blessed the seventh day and hallowed it, because on it God rested from all his work which he had done in creation. 4 These are the generations of the heavens and the earth when they were created. In the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens, 5 when no plant of the field was yet in the earth and no herb of the field had yet sprung up--for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and there was no man to till the ground; 6 but a mist went up from the earth and watered the whole face of the ground-- 7 then the LORD God formed man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being. 8 And the LORD God planted a garden in Eden, in the east; and there he put the man whom he had formed. 9 And out of the ground the LORD God made to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food, the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. 10 A river flowed out of Eden to water the garden, and there it divided and became four rivers. 11 The name of the first is Pishon; it is the one which flows around the whole land of Havilah, where there is gold; 12 and the gold of that land is good; bdellium and onyx stone are there. 13 The name of the second river is Gihon; it is the one which flows around the whole land of Cush. 14 And the name of the third river is Tigris, which flows east of Assyria. And the fourth river is the Euphrates. 15 The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to till it and keep it. 16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, "You may freely eat of every tree of the garden; 17 but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall die." 18 Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him." 19 So out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all cattle, and to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for the man there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh; 22 and the rib which the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, "This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." 24 Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked, and were not ashamed.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:33am GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 3 of 1189 Genesis 3 1 Now the serpent was more subtle than any other wild creature that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God say, 'You shall not eat of any tree of the garden'?" 2 And the woman said to the serpent, "We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden; 3 but God said, 'You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.'" 4 But the serpent said to the woman, "You will not die. 5 For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil." 6 So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate; and she also gave some to her husband, and he ate. 7 Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves aprons. 8 And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the LORD God called to the man, and said to him, "Where are you?" 10 And he said, "I heard the sound of thee in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself." 11 He said, "Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?" 12 The man said, "The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate." 13 Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this that you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent beguiled me, and I ate." 14 The LORD God said to the serpent, "Because you have done this, cursed are you above all cattle, and above all wild animals; upon your belly you shall go, and dust you shall eat all the days of your life. 15 I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her seed; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel." 16 To the woman he said, "I will greatly multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children, yet your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." 17 And to Adam he said, "Because you have listened to the voice of your wife, and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, 'You shall not eat of it,' cursed is the ground because of you; in toil you shall eat of it all the days of your life; 18 thorns and thistles it shall bring forth to you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. 19 In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; you are dust, and to dust you shall return." 20 The man called his wife's name Eve, because she was the mother of all living. 21 And the LORD God made for Adam and for his wife garments of skins, and clothed them. 22 Then the LORD God said, "Behold, the man has become like one of us, knowing good and evil; and now, lest he put forth his hand and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever" -- 23 therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from which he was taken. 24 He drove out the man; and at the east of the garden of Eden he placed the cherubim, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to guard the way to the tree of life.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:34am GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 4 of 1189 Genesis 4 1 Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, saying, "I have gotten a man with the help of the LORD." 2 And again, she bore his brother Abel. Now Abel was a keeper of sheep, and Cain a tiller of the ground. 3 In the course of time Cain brought to the LORD an offering of the fruit of the ground, 4 and Abel brought of the firstlings of his flock and of their fat portions. And the LORD had regard for Abel and his offering, 5 but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his countenance fell. 6 The LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry, and why has your countenance fallen? 7 If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is couching at the door; its desire is for you, but you must master it." 8 Cain said to Abel his brother, "Let us go out to the field." And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel, and killed him. 9 Then the LORD said to Cain, "Where is Abel your brother?" He said, "I do not know; am I my brother's keeper?" 10 And the LORD said, "What have you done? The voice of your brother's blood is crying to me from the ground. 11 And now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hand. 12 When you till the ground, it shall no longer yield to you its strength; you shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth." 13 Cain said to the LORD, "My punishment is greater than I can bear. 14 Behold, thou hast driven me this day away from the ground; and from thy face I shall be hidden; and I shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth, and whoever finds me will slay me." 15 Then the LORD said to him, "Not so! If any one slays Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold." And the LORD put a mark on Cain, lest any who came upon him should kill him. 16 Then Cain went away from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, east of Eden. 17 Cain knew his wife, and she conceived and bore Enoch; and he built a city, and called the name of the city after the name of his son, Enoch. 18 To Enoch was born Irad; and Irad was the father of Me-hu'ja-el, and Me-hu'ja-el the father of Me-thu'sha-el, and Me-thu'sha-el the father of Lamech. 19 And Lamech took two wives; the name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah. 20 Adah bore Jabal; he was the father of those who dwell in tents and have cattle. 21 His brother's name was Jubal; he was the father of all those who play the lyre and pipe. 22 Zillah bore Tubal-cain; he was the forger of all instruments of bronze and iron. The sister of Tubal-cain was Na'amah. 23 Lamech said to his wives: "Adah and Zillah, hear my voice; you wives of Lamech, hearken to what I say: I have slain a man for wounding me, a young man for striking me. 24 If Cain is avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy-sevenfold." 25 And Adam knew his wife again, and she bore a son and called his name Seth, for she said, "God has appointed for me another child instead of Abel, for Cain slew him." 26 To Seth also a son was born, and he called his name Enosh. At that time men began to call upon the name of the LORD.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:35am GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 5 of 1189 Genesis 5 1 This is the book of the generations of Adam. When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God. 2 Male and female he created them, and he blessed them and named them Man when they were created. 3 When Adam had lived a hundred and thirty years, he became the father of a son in his own likeness, after his image, and named him Seth. 4 The days of Adam after he became the father of Seth were eight hundred years; and he had other sons and daughters. 5 Thus all the days that Adam lived were nine hundred and thirty years; and he died. 6 When Seth had lived a hundred and five years, he became the father of Enosh. 7 Seth lived after the birth of Enosh eight hundred and seven years, and had other sons and daughters. 8 Thus all the days of Seth were nine hundred and twelve years; and he died. 9 When Enosh had lived ninety years, he became the father of Kenan. 10 Enosh lived after the birth of Kenan eight hundred and fifteen years, and had other sons and daughters. 11 Thus all the days of Enosh were nine hundred and five years; and he died. 12 When Kenan had lived seventy years, he became the father of Ma-hal'alel. 13 Kenan lived after the birth of Ma-hal'alel eight hundred and forty years, and had other sons and daughters. 14 Thus all the days of Kenan were nine hundred and ten years; and he died. 15 When Ma-hal'alel had lived sixty-five years, he became the father of Jared. 16 Ma-hal'alel lived after the birth of Jared eight hundred and thirty years, and had other sons and daughters. 17 Thus all the days of Ma-hal'alel were eight hundred and ninety-five years; and he died. 18 When Jared had lived a hundred and sixty-two years he became the father of Enoch. 19 Jared lived after the birth of Enoch eight hundred years, and had other sons and daughters. 20 Thus all the days of Jared were nine hundred and sixty-two years; and he died. 21 When Enoch had lived sixty-five years, he became the father of Methu'selah. 22 Enoch walked with God after the birth of Methu'selah three hundred years, and had other sons and daughters. 23 Thus all the days of Enoch were three hundred and sixty-five years. 24 Enoch walked with God; and he was not, for God took him. 25 When Methu'selah had lived a hundred and eighty-seven years, he became the father of Lamech. 26 Methu'selah lived after the birth of Lamech seven hundred and eighty-two years, and had other sons and daughters. 27 Thus all the days of Methu'selah were nine hundred and sixty-nine years; and he died. 28 When Lamech had lived a hundred and eighty-two years, he became the father of a son, 29 and called his name Noah, saying, "Out of the ground which the LORD has cursed this one shall bring us relief from our work and from the toil of our hands." 30 Lamech lived after the birth of Noah five hundred and ninety-five years, and had other sons and daughters. 31 Thus all the days of Lamech were seven hundred and seventy-seven years; and he died. 32 After Noah was five hundred years old, Noah became the father of Shem, Ham, and Japheth.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:44pm GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 6 of 1189 Genesis 6 1 When men began to multiply on the face of the ground, and daughters were born to them, 2 the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were fair; and they took to wife such of them as they chose. 3 Then the LORD said, "My spirit shall not abide in man for ever, for he is flesh, but his days shall be a hundred and twenty years." 4 The Nephilim were on the earth in those days, and also afterward, when the sons of God came in to the daughters of men, and they bore children to them. These were the mighty men that were of old, the men of renown. 5 The LORD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. 6 And the LORD was sorry that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him to his heart. 7 So the LORD said, "I will blot out man whom I have created from the face of the ground, man and beast and creeping things and birds of the air, for I am sorry that I have made them." 8 But Noah found favor in the eyes of the LORD. 9 These are the generations of Noah. Noah was a righteous man, blameless in his generation; Noah walked with God. 10 And Noah had three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth. 11 Now the earth was corrupt in God's sight, and the earth was filled with violence. 12 And God saw the earth, and behold, it was corrupt; for all flesh had corrupted their way upon the earth. 13 And God said to Noah, "I have determined to make an end of all flesh; for the earth is filled with violence through them; behold, I will destroy them with the earth. 14 Make yourself an ark of gopher wood; make rooms in the ark, and cover it inside and out with pitch. 15 This is how you are to make it: the length of the ark three hundred cubits, its breadth fifty cubits, and its height thirty cubits. 16 Make a roof for the ark, and finish it to a cubit above; and set the door of the ark in its side; make it with lower, second, and third decks. 17 For behold, I will bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh in which is the breath of life from under heaven; everything that is on the earth shall die. 18 But I will establish my covenant with you; and you shall come into the ark, you, your sons, your wife, and your sons' wives with you. 19 And of every living thing of all flesh, you shall bring two of every sort into the ark, to keep them alive with you; they shall be male and female. 20 Of the birds according to their kinds, and of the animals according to their kinds, of every creeping thing of the ground according to its kind, two of every sort shall come in to you, to keep them alive. 21 Also take with you every sort of food that is eaten, and store it up; and it shall serve as food for you and for them." 22 Noah did this; he did all that God commanded him.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:44pm GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 7 of 1189 Genesis 7 1 Then the LORD said to Noah, "Go into the ark, you and all your household, for I have seen that you are righteous before me in this generation. 2 Take with you seven pairs of all clean animals, the male and his mate; and a pair of the animals that are not clean, the male and his mate; 3 and seven pairs of the birds of the air also, male and female, to keep their kind alive upon the face of all the earth. 4 For in seven days I will send rain upon the earth forty days and forty nights; and every living thing that I have made I will blot out from the face of the ground." 5 And Noah did all that the LORD had commanded him. 6 Noah was six hundred years old when the flood of waters came upon the earth. 7 And Noah and his sons and his wife and his sons' wives with him went into the ark, to escape the waters of the flood. 8 Of clean animals, and of animals that are not clean, and of birds, and of everything that creeps on the ground, 9 two and two, male and female, went into the ark with Noah, as God had commanded Noah. 10 And after seven days the waters of the flood came upon the earth. 11 In the six hundredth year of Noah's life, in the second month, on the seventeenth day of the month, on that day all the fountains of the great deep burst forth, and the windows of the heavens were opened. 12 And rain fell upon the earth forty days and forty nights. 13 On the very same day Noah and his sons, Shem and Ham and Japheth, and Noah's wife and the three wives of his sons with them entered the ark, 14 they and every beast according to its kind, and all the cattle according to their kinds, and every creeping thing that creeps on the earth according to its kind, and every bird according to its kind, every bird of every sort. 15 They went into the ark with Noah, two and two of all flesh in which there was the breath of life. 16 And they that entered, male and female of all flesh, went in as God had commanded him; and the LORD shut him in. 17 The flood continued forty days upon the earth; and the waters increased, and bore up the ark, and it rose high above the earth. 18 The waters prevailed and increased greatly upon the earth; and the ark floated on the face of the waters. 19 And the waters prevailed so mightily upon the earth that all the high mountains under the whole heaven were covered; 20 the waters prevailed above the mountains, covering them fifteen cubits deep. 21 And all flesh died that moved upon the earth, birds, cattle, beasts, all swarming creatures that swarm upon the earth, and every man; 22 everything on the dry land in whose nostrils was the breath of life died. 23 He blotted out every living thing that was upon the face of the ground, man and animals and creeping things and birds of the air; they were blotted out from the earth. Only Noah was left, and those that were with him in the ark. 24 And the waters prevailed upon the earth a hundred and fifty days.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:45pm GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 8 of 1189 Genesis 8 1 But God remembered Noah and all the beasts and all the cattle that were with him in the ark. And God made a wind blow over the earth, and the waters subsided; 2 the fountains of the deep and the windows of the heavens were closed, the rain from the heavens was restrained, 3 and the waters receded from the earth continually. At the end of a hundred and fifty days the waters had abated; 4 and in the seventh month, on the seventeenth day of the month, the ark came to rest upon the mountains of Ar'arat. 5 And the waters continued to abate until the tenth month; in the tenth month, on the first day of the month, the tops of the mountains were seen. 6 At the end of forty days Noah opened the window of the ark which he had made, 7 and sent forth a raven; and it went to and fro until the waters were dried up from the earth. 8 Then he sent forth a dove from him, to see if the waters had subsided from the face of the ground; 9 but the dove found no place to set her foot, and she returned to him to the ark, for the waters were still on the face of the whole earth. So he put forth his hand and took her and brought her into the ark with him. 10 He waited another seven days, and again he sent forth the dove out of the ark; 11 and the dove came back to him in the evening, and lo, in her mouth a freshly plucked olive leaf; so Noah knew that the waters had subsided from the earth. 12 Then he waited another seven days, and sent forth the dove; and she did not return to him any more. 13 In the six hundred and first year, in the first month, the first day of the month, the waters were dried from off the earth; and Noah removed the covering of the ark, and looked, and behold, the face of the ground was dry. 14 In the second month, on the twenty-seventh day of the month, the earth was dry. 15 Then God said to Noah, 16 "Go forth from the ark, you and your wife, and your sons and your sons' wives with you. 17 Bring forth with you every living thing that is with you of all flesh--birds and animals and every creeping thing that creeps on the earth--that they may breed abundantly on the earth, and be fruitful and multiply upon the earth." 18 So Noah went forth, and his sons and his wife and his sons' wives with him. 19 And every beast, every creeping thing, and every bird, everything that moves upon the earth, went forth by families out of the ark. 20 Then Noah built an altar to the LORD, and took of every clean animal and of every clean bird, and offered burnt offerings on the altar. 21 And when the LORD smelled the pleasing odor, the LORD said in his heart, "I will never again curse the ground because of man, for the imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth; neither will I ever again destroy every living creature as I have done. 22 While the earth remains, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night, shall not cease."

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:46pm GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 9 of 1189 Genesis 9 1 And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth. 2 The fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth, and upon every bird of the air, upon everything that creeps on the ground and all the fish of the sea; into your hand they are delivered. 3 Every moving thing that lives shall be food for you; and as I gave you the green plants, I give you everything. 4 Only you shall not eat flesh with its life, that is, its blood. 5 For your lifeblood I will surely require a reckoning; of every beast I will require it and of man; of every man's brother I will require the life of man. 6 Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for God made man in his own image. 7 And you, be fruitful and multiply, bring forth abundantly on the earth and multiply in it." 8 Then God said to Noah and to his sons with him, 9 "Behold, I establish my covenant with you and your descendants after you, 10 and with every living creature that is with you, the birds, the cattle, and every beast of the earth with you, as many as came out of the ark. 11 I establish my covenant with you, that never again shall all flesh be cut off by the waters of a flood, and never again shall there be a flood to destroy the earth." 12 And God said, "This is the sign of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that is with you, for all future generations: 13 I set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be a sign of the covenant between me and the earth. 14 When I bring clouds over the earth and the bow is seen in the clouds, 15 I will remember my covenant which is between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall never again become a flood to destroy all flesh. 16 When the bow is in the clouds, I will look upon it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is upon the earth." 17 God said to Noah, "This is the sign of the covenant which I have established between me and all flesh that is upon the earth." 18 The sons of Noah who went forth from the ark were Shem, Ham, and Japheth. Ham was the father of Canaan. 19 These three were the sons of Noah; and from these the whole earth was peopled. 20 Noah was the first tiller of the soil. He planted a vineyard; 21 and he drank of the wine, and became drunk, and lay uncovered in his tent. 22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brothers outside. 23 Then Shem and Japheth took a garment, laid it upon both their shoulders, and walked backward and covered the nakedness of their father; their faces were turned away, and they did not see their father's nakedness. 24 When Noah awoke from his wine and knew what his youngest son had done to him, 25 he said, "Cursed be Canaan; a slave of slaves shall he be to his brothers." 26 He also said, "Blessed by the LORD my God be Shem; and let Canaan be his slave." 27 God enlarge Japheth, and let him dwell in the tents of Shem; and let Canaan be his slave." 28 After the flood Noah lived three hundred and fifty years. 29 All the days of Noah were nine hundred and fifty years; and he died.

Mr. Langosta said @ 2:47pm GMT on 9th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 10 of 1189 Genesis 10 1 These are the generations of the sons of Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth; sons were born to them after the flood. 2 The sons of Japheth: Gomer, Magog, Madai, Javan, Tubal, Meshech, and Tiras. 3 The sons of Gomer: Ash'kenaz, Riphath, and Togar'mah. 4 The sons of Javan: Eli'shah, Tarshish, Kittim, and Do'danim. 5 From these the coastland peoples spread. These are the sons of Japheth in their lands, each with his own language, by their families, in their nations. 6 The sons of Ham: Cush, Egypt, Put, and Canaan. 7 The sons of Cush: Seba, Hav'ilah, Sabtah, Ra'amah, and Sab'teca. The sons of Ra'amah: Sheba and Dedan. 8 Cush became the father of Nimrod; he was the first on earth to be a mighty man. 9 He was a mighty hunter before the LORD; therefore it is said, "Like Nimrod a mighty hunter before the LORD." 10 The beginning of his kingdom was Ba'bel, Erech, and Accad, all of them in the land of Shinar. 11 From that land he went into Assyria, and built Nin'eveh, Reho'both-Ir, Calah, and 12 Resen between Nin'eveh and Calah; that is the great city. 13 Egypt became the father of Ludim, An'amim, Leha'bim, Naph-tu'him, 14 Pathru'sim, Caslu'him (whence came the Philistines), and Caph'torim. 15 Canaan became the father of Sidon his first-born, and Heth, 16 and the Jeb'usites, the Amorites, the Gir'gashites, 17 the Hivites, the Arkites, the Sinites, 18 the Ar'vadites, the Zem'arites, and the Ha'mathites. Afterward the families of the Canaanites spread abroad. 19 And the territory of the Canaanites extended from Sidon, in the direction of Gerar, as far as Gaza, and in the direction of Sodom, Gomor'rah, Admah, and Zeboi'im, as far as Lasha. 20 These are the sons of Ham, by their families, their languages, their lands, and their nations. 21 To Shem also, the father of all the children of Eber, the elder brother of Japheth, children were born. 22 The sons of Shem: Elam, Asshur, Arpach'shad, Lud, and Aram. 23 The sons of Aram: Uz, Hul, Gether, and Mash. 24 Arpach'shad became the father of Shelah; and Shelah became the father of Eber. 25 To Eber were born two sons: the name of the one was Peleg, for in his days the earth was divided, and his brother's name was Joktan. 26 Joktan became the father of Almo'dad, Sheleph, Hazarma'veth, Jerah, 27 Hador'am, Uzal, Diklah, 28 Obal, Abim'a-el, Sheba, 29 Ophir, Hav'ilah, and Jobab; all these were the sons of Joktan. 30 The territory in which they lived extended from Mesha in the direction of Sephar to the hill country of the east. 31 These are the sons of Shem, by their families, their languages, their lands, and their nations. 32 These are the families of the sons of Noah, according to their genealogies, in their nations; and from these the nations spread abroad on the earth after the flood.

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:57am GMT on 10th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 11 of 1189 Genesis 11 1 Now the whole earth had one language and few words. 2 And as men migrated from the east, they found a plain in the land of Shinar and settled there. 3 And they said to one another, "Come, let us make bricks, and burn them thoroughly." And they had brick for stone, and bitumen for mortar. 4 Then they said, "Come, let us build ourselves a city, and a tower with its top in the heavens, and let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth." 5 And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the sons of men had built. 6 And the LORD said, "Behold, they are one people, and they have all one language; and this is only the beginning of what they will do; and nothing that they propose to do will now be impossible for them. 7 Come, let us go down, and there confuse their language, that they may not understand one another's speech." 8 So the LORD scattered them abroad from there over the face of all the earth, and they left off building the city. 9 Therefore its name was called Ba'bel, because there the LORD confused the language of all the earth; and from there the LORD scattered them abroad over the face of all the earth. 10 These are the descendants of Shem. When Shem was a hundred years old, he became the father of Arpach'shad two years after the flood; 11 and Shem lived after the birth of Arpach'shad five hundred years, and had other sons and daughters. 12 When Arpach'shad had lived thirty-five years, he became the father of Shelah; 13 and Arpach'shad lived after the birth of Shelah four hundred and three years, and had other sons and daughters. 14 When Shelah had lived thirty years, he became the father of Eber; 15 and Shelah lived after the birth of Eber four hundred and three years, and had other sons and daughters. 16 When Eber had lived thirty-four years, he became the father of Peleg; 17 and Eber lived after the birth of Peleg four hundred and thirty years, and had other sons and daughters. 18 When Peleg had lived thirty years, he became the father of Re'u; 19 and Peleg lived after the birth of Re'u two hundred and nine years, and had other sons and daughters. 20 When Re'u had lived thirty-two years, he became the father of Serug; 21 and Re'u lived after the birth of Serug two hundred and seven years, and had other sons and daughters. 22 When Serug had lived thirty years, he became the father of Nahor; 23 and Serug lived after the birth of Nahor two hundred years, and had other sons and daughters. 24 When Nahor had lived twenty-nine years, he became the father of Terah; 25 and Nahor lived after the birth of Terah a hundred and nineteen years, and had other sons and daughters. 26 When Terah had lived seventy years, he became the father of Abram, Nahor, and Haran. 27 Now these are the descendants of Terah. Terah was the father of Abram, Nahor, and Haran; and Haran was the father of Lot. 28 Haran died before his father Terah in the land of his birth, in Ur of the Chalde'ans. 29 And Abram and Nahor took wives; the name of Abram's wife was Sar'ai, and the name of Nahor's wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran the father of Milcah and Iscah. 30 Now Sar'ai was barren; she had no child. 31 Terah took Abram his son and Lot the son of Haran, his grandson, and Sar'ai his daughter-in-law, his son Abram's wife, and they went forth together from Ur of the Chalde'ans to go into the land of Canaan; but when they came to Haran, they settled there. 32 The days of Terah were two hundred and five years; and Terah died in Haran.

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:57am GMT on 10th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 12 of 1189 Genesis 12 1 Now the LORD said to Abram, "Go from your country and your kindred and your father's house to the land that I will show you. 2 And I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you, and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. 3 I will bless those who bless you, and him who curses you I will curse; and by you all the families of the earth shall bless themselves." 4 So Abram went, as the LORD had told him; and Lot went with him. Abram was seventy-five years old when he departed from Haran. 5 And Abram took Sar'ai his wife, and Lot his brother's son, and all their possessions which they had gathered, and the persons that they had gotten in Haran; and they set forth to go to the land of Canaan. When they had come to the land of Canaan, 6 Abram passed through the land to the place at Shechem, to the oak of Moreh. At that time the Canaanites were in the land. 7 Then the LORD appeared to Abram, and said, "To your descendants I will give this land." So he built there an altar to the LORD, who had appeared to him. 8 Thence he removed to the mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, with Bethel on the west and Ai on the east; and there he built an altar to the LORD and called on the name of the LORD. 9 And Abram journeyed on, still going toward the Negeb. 10 Now there was a famine in the land. So Abram went down to Egypt to sojourn there, for the famine was severe in the land. 11 When he was about to enter Egypt, he said to Sar'ai his wife, "I know that you are a woman beautiful to behold; 12 and when the Egyptians see you, they will say, 'This is his wife'; then they will kill me, but they will let you live. 13 Say you are my sister, that it may go well with me because of you, and that my life may be spared on your account." 14 When Abram entered Egypt the Egyptians saw that the woman was very beautiful. 15 And when the princes of Pharaoh saw her, they praised her to Pharaoh. And the woman was taken into Pharaoh's house. 16 And for her sake he dealt well with Abram; and he had sheep, oxen, he-asses, menservants, maidservants, she-asses, and camels. 17 But the LORD afflicted Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sar'ai, Abram's wife. 18 So Pharaoh called Abram, and said, "What is this you have done to me? Why did you not tell me that she was your wife? 19 Why did you say, 'She is my sister,' so that I took her for my wife? Now then, here is your wife, take her, and be gone." 20 And Pharaoh gave men orders concerning him; and they set him on the way, with his wife and all that he had.

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:58am GMT on 10th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 13 of 1189 Genesis 13 1 So Abram went up from Egypt, he and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the Negeb. 2 Now Abram was very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold. 3 And he journeyed on from the Negeb as far as Bethel, to the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Ai, 4 to the place where he had made an altar at the first; and there Abram called on the name of the LORD. 5 And Lot, who went with Abram, also had flocks and herds and tents, 6 so that the land could not support both of them dwelling together; for their possessions were so great that they could not dwell together, 7 and there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram's cattle and the herdsmen of Lot's cattle. At that time the Canaanites and the Per'izzites dwelt in the land. 8 Then Abram said to Lot, "Let there be no strife between you and me, and between your herdsmen and my herdsmen; for we are kinsmen. 9 Is not the whole land before you? Separate yourself from me. If you take the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if you take the right hand, then I will go to the left." 10 And Lot lifted up his eyes, and saw that the Jordan valley was well watered everywhere like the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt, in the direction of Zo'ar; this was before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomor'rah. 11 So Lot chose for himself all the Jordan valley, and Lot journeyed east; thus they separated from each other. 12 Abram dwelt in the land of Canaan, while Lot dwelt among the cities of the valley and moved his tent as far as Sodom. 13 Now the men of Sodom were wicked, great sinners against the LORD. 14 The LORD said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, "Lift up your eyes, and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward; 15 for all the land which you see I will give to you and to your descendants for ever. 16 I will make your descendants as the dust of the earth; so that if one can count the dust of the earth, your descendants also can be counted. 17 Arise, walk through the length and the breadth of the land, for I will give it to you." 18 So Abram moved his tent, and came and dwelt by the oaks of Mamre, which are at Hebron; and there he built an altar to the LORD.

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:59am GMT on 10th Mar [Score:-1 Overrated] Page 14 of 1189 Genesis 14 1 In the days of Am'raphel king of Shinar, Ar'ioch king of Ella'sar, Ched-or-lao'mer king of Elam, and Tidal king of Goi'im, 2 these kings made war with Bera king of Sodom, Birsha king of Gomor'rah, Shinab king of Admah, Sheme'ber king of Zeboi'im, and the king of Bela (that is, Zo'ar). 3 And all these joined forces in the Valley of Siddim (that is, the Salt Sea). 4 Twelve years they had served Ched-or-lao'mer, but in the thirteenth year they rebelled. 5 In the fourteenth year Ched-or-lao'mer and the kings who were with him came and subdued the Reph'aim in Ash'teroth-karna'im, the Zuzim in Ham, the Emim in Sha'veh-kiriatha'im, 6 and the Horites in their Mount Se'ir as far as El-paran on the border of the wilderness; 7 then they turned back and came to Enmish'pat (that is, Kadesh), and subdued all the country of the Amal'ekites, and also the Amorites who dwelt in Haz'azon-ta'mar. 8 Then the king of Sodom, the king of Gomor'rah, the king of Admah, the king of Zeboi'im, and the king of Bela (that is, Zo'ar) went out, and they joined battle in the Valley of Siddim 9 with Ched-or-lao'mer king of Elam, Tidal king of Goi'im, Am'raphel king of Shinar, and Ar'ioch king of Ella'sar, four kings against five. 10 Now the Valley of Siddim was full of bitumen pits; and as the kings of Sodom and Gomor'rah fled, some fell into them, and the rest fled to the mountain. 11 So the enemy took all the goods of Sodom and Gomor'rah, and all their provisions, and went their way; 12 they also took Lot, the son of Abram's brother, who dwelt in Sodom, and his goods, and departed. 13 Then one who had escaped came, and told Abram the Hebrew, who was living by the oaks of Mamre the Amorite, brother of Eshcol and of Aner; these were allies of Abram. 14 When Abram heard that his kinsman had been taken captive, he led forth his trained men, born in his house, three hundred and eighteen of them, and went in pursuit as far as Dan. 15 And he divided his forces against them by night, he and his servants, and routed them and pursued them to Hobah, north of Damascus. 16 Then he brought back all the goods, and also brought back his kinsman Lot with his goods, and the women and the people. 17 After his return from the defeat of Ched-or-lao'mer and the kings who were with him, the king of Sodom went out to meet him at the Valley of Shaveh (that is, the King's Valley). 18 And Mel-chiz'edek king of Salem brought out bread and wine; he was priest of God Most High. 19 And he blessed him and said, "Blessed be Abram by God Most High, maker of heaven and earth; 20 and blessed be God Most High, who has delivered your enemies into your hand!" And Abram gave him a tenth of everything. 21 And the king of Sodom said to Abram, "Give me the persons, but take the goods for yourself." 22 But Abram said to the king of Sodom, "I have sworn to the LORD God Most High, maker of heaven and earth, 23 that I would not take a thread or a sandal-thong or anything that is yours, lest you should say, 'I have made Abram rich.' 24 I will take nothing but what the young men have eaten, and the share of the men who went with me; let Aner, Eshcol, and Mamre take their share."

Mr. Langosta said @ 3:59am GMT on 10th Mar Page 15 of 1189 Genesis 15 1 After these things the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision, "Fear not, Abram, I am your shield; your reward shall be very great." 2 But Abram said, "O Lord GOD, what wilt thou give me, for I continue childless, and the heir of my house is Elie'zer of Damascus?" 3 And Abram said, "Behold, thou hast given me no offspring; and a slave born in my house will be my heir." 4 And behold, the word of the LORD came to him, "This man shall not be your heir; your own son shall be your heir." 5 And he brought him outside and said, "Look toward heaven, and number the stars, if you are able to number them." Then he said to him, "So shall your descendants be." 6 And he believed the LORD; and he reckoned it to him as righteousness. 7 And he said to him, "I am the LORD who brought you from Ur of the Chalde'ans, to give you this land to possess." 8 But he said, "O Lord GOD, how am I to know that I shall possess it?" 9 He said to him, "Bring me a heifer three years old, a she-goat three years old, a ram three years old, a turtledove, and a young pigeon." 10 And he brought him all these, cut them in two, and laid each half over against the other; but he did not cut the birds in two. 11 And when birds of prey came down upon the carcasses, Abram drove them away. 12 As the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell on Abram; and lo, a dread and great darkness fell upon him. 13 Then the LORD said to Abram, "Know of a surety that your descendants will be sojourners in a land that is not theirs, and will be slaves there, and they will be oppressed for four hundred years; 14 but I will bring judgment on the nation which they serve, and afterward they shall come out with great possessions. 15 As for yourself, you shall go to your fathers in peace; you shall be buried in a good old age. 16 And they shall come back here in the fourth generation; for the iniquity of the Amorites is not yet complete." 17 When the sun had gone down and it was dark, behold, a smoking fire pot and a flaming torch passed between these pieces. 18 On that day the LORD made a covenant with Abram, saying, "To your descendants I give this land, from the river of Egypt to the great river, the river Euphra'tes, 19 the land of the Ken'ites, the Ken'izzites, the Kad'monites, 20 the Hittites, the Per'izzites, the Reph'aim, 21 the Amorites, the Canaanites, the Gir'gashites and the Jeb'usites."

housewares said @ 9:20pm GMT on 11th Mar [Score:1 Insightful] [ "PLACED BY THE GIDEONS" ]

Adam said @ 8:45pm GMT on 15th Aug God gives good head!

At124 said @ 10:21pm GMT on 15th Jul [Score:-1 Overrated]

n0ah said @ 7:23pm GMT on 23rd Apr [Score:-1]

o_o said @ 1:08am GMT on 14th Oct

mao tse helen said @ 5:50am GMT on 14th Oct oooOOOooo, this is spooky. Like finding a gigantic Boba Fett helmet in the middle of the desert.

At124 said @ 8:31am GMT on 16th Oct http://www.sensibleerection.com/entry.php/41085

At124 said @ 8:31am GMT on 16th Oct http://bbspot.com/Images/News_Features/2004/10/file_extensions/gif.jpg

f00m@nB@r said @ 8:55am GMT on 28th Oct --> huh?

ckfahrenheit said @ 11:23pm GMT on 28th Oct O TEH COLORS

Ifrit said @ 5:42pm GMT on 29th Oct awesome, I found the awesome lost page of SE again!!! WEEE!!!

leswilkerson said @ 5:47pm GMT on 29th Oct BEST THREAD EVARZ! GGGGGGGGGGGgg GGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRrr dfdfd

At124 said @ 5:57pm GMT on 1st Nov Only the marque&blink tag should be allowed!

tero-kun said @ 3:42pm GMT on 4th Nov Tero was here

nonsense said @ 7:47am GMT on 5th Nov Interesting. 11/4/04

nonsense said @ 7:48am GMT on 5th Nov Motherfucker.

nonsense said @ 7:47am GMT on 5th Nov Interesting. 11/5/04

nonsense said @ 3:06am GMT on 30th Nov 11/30/04. Thanks, banksr0.

At124 said @ 10:16pm GMT on 11th Nov WTF

At124 said @ 10:18pm GMT on 11th Nov WTF

kidnapper #1 said @ 4:06am GMT on 14th Nov [Score:1 Interesting] heLLo  mother  Leopard   i   have  your  cub.  you must  protect  her  but  that  wiLL  be  expensive.  ten  thousand  wrapped  in  brown  paper.  i  wiLL  be  the  hyena,  you'LL  see.

f00m@nB@r said @ 12:37am GMT on 23rd Nov f00

f00m@nB@r said @ 12:37am GMT on 23rd Nov f00

ChewyStick said @ 12:01am GMT on 25th Nov Kerfuckered!

CockMaster r Us said @ 9:28pm GMT on 6th Dec Wtf is going on here!

david_the_bumblebee said @ 9:42pm GMT on 6th Dec OMFG

edl69 said @ 6:21pm GMT on 10th Dec Wow, I've reached the end of the world. And it's old.

jkd003 said @ 11:33pm GMT on 10th Dec i am now the happyst man alive i feel the jive a cat that must be revived xj9 you will join the hive I've cum up with so many words that end in ive so who is going to give me a hive five i mean high five could it be that ive bing acken oiver by ive i hop i stay alive i just took the dive in to this scary pive i mean place i dont want to diVe oh no help me what have ive beecome goodbive

p_headless_g said @ 10:20pm GMT on 21st Jan src="http://www.post-literate.com/gerpunx/archives/hasselhoffian-recursion.gif">

gos_jim said @ 4:44pm GMT on 31st Jan Well.... that's interesting. o.O

relm said @ 4:22pm GMT on 23rd Feb "Ford!" Arthur said, "there's an infinite number of monkeys outside who want to talk to us about this script for Hamlet they've worked out!"

leezurd said @ 9:03pm GMT on 8th Mar /me tucks this away ----->here. Funny. I thought by my 1000th comment, I would have something more meaningful, or funny or something involved. But, I worked all day. Normally my day off, it was just a day from Hell. Everyone had some problem or another... It's OK, though. I'm still breathing, and I'm home now. Time to slip into a nice Rum&Coke, and click through the posts. Fenny may be on. Or, maybe, I'll bounce on to (M)IRC (<---Thanks CHOP!) and see if Sensibleb (May I call you 'bleb'?) is around. I never seem to catch Graham anywhere :/ Or, maybe, just maybe, the Rum might lead me to ES...

popoBo said @ 12:31am GMT on 11th Mar WOW!!!! HOLY FUCKING WOW!

popoBo said @ 8:20am GMT on 28th Mar Here I am again...

herr pes said @ 8:37am GMT on 28th Mar woosh!

graham said @ 4:22pm GMT on 28th Mar -->

graham said @ 4:25pm GMT on 28th Mar well then...this should be fine and dandy now..

leezurd said @ 10:48pm GMT on 28th Mar No, no it isn't. But thanks for playing!

leezurd said @ 11:55pm GMT on 6th Apr How the fuck did I end up back here?

letoofdune said @ 1:09am GMT on 7th Apr Fuck...I've reached the end of the world again. Time to start over.

spacebunny said @ 4:47am GMT on 7th Apr [Score:2]

Fenny said @ 5:23am GMT on 7th Apr Restuarant at the End of the Universe!!!

[ploink] said @ 5:54am GMT on 10th Apr unbreak it plz kthx

graham said @ 4:17pm GMT on 21st Apr huh...whoda thunk it'd bring me here? links are fun :D

letoofdune said @ 2:50pm GMT on 26th Apr Oh God. I'm here again. And so is that goddamn dancing banana.

relm said @ 12:07pm GMT on 29th Apr I bet you think I have it easy don't you? You think I mosey on in here at 9:00 am, say hello to my secretary and shut myself up in an office untill 5:00 pm. Well let me tell you somthing pal, they did not make me President of Hostess Cakes Inc. for nothing. I sucked a lot of cock to get where I am now with my designer suits and Italian sports cars. I started out just like you at the bottom, but then I strived to better my self. I got myself a pair of knee pads and a bib and started sucking cock down in the portopotties and got myself into my own office with a view. Hell, my entire experience at this company has been nothing but one big fat dong party! As soon as you walk out of this office I'm gonna be on the phone with a shareholder to set up an appointment to suck cock in Liverpool this afternoon! Now before you run outta here screaming, are you circumsized? Because smegma just totally ruins it for both of us.

letoofdune said @ 3:06am GMT on 9th May

Rammek said @ 2:33pm GMT on 9th May Fuck. Yeah.

puravida said @ 11:02pm GMT on 16th May bang ban boogie woogie bang bang bang!!!

leezurd said @ 11:55pm GMT on 16th May ~"have you ever went over a friends house to eat and the food just aint no good i mean the macaroni's soggy the peas are mushed and the chicken tastes like wood so you try to play it off like you think you can by sayin that youre full and then your friend says momma he's just being polite he aint finished uh uh that's bull so your heart starts pumpin and you think of a lie and you say that you already ate and your friend says man there's plenty of food so you pile some more on your plate while the stinky foods steamin your mind starts to dreamin of the moment that it's time to leave and then you look at your plate and your chickens slowly rottin into something that looks like cheese oh so you say that's it i got to leave this place i dont care what these people think im just sittin here makin myself nauseous with this ugly food that stinks so you bust out the door while its still closed still sick from the food you ate and then you run to the store for quick relief from a bottle of kaopectate..."

ManHoDraizuh said @ 5:34pm GMT on 3rd Jul +1 Harry h0tt3r

Trigger said @ 3:37pm GMT on 7th Jul CHOP!

Trigger said @ 3:38pm GMT on 7th Jul SOME OF US LIVE

Trigger said @ 3:39pm GMT on 7th Jul ON THE ADMIN PAGE!!

housewares said @ 2:40am GMT on 10th Jul WE NEED THIS PARROT

Chop-Logik said @ 7:35pm GMT on 11th Jul The anti-anti-negative-start/end!

Chop-Logik said @ 7:36pm GMT on 11th Jul Oh, and it would take me to post 0....

At124 said @ 10:20pm GMT on 15th Jul

donnie said @ 2:27pm GMT on 3rd Sep

p_headless_g said @ 10:33am GMT on 23rd Oct You fucking sons of bitches. I made a purposeful attempt to never hear that song again. You FUCKING SONS OF BITCHES. I will KILL YOU. With MY BRAIN.

cache22 said @ 4:20pm GMT on 28th Nov It took me 6 months. but I finally read this entire page.

puravida said @ 5:06pm GMT on 28th Nov my head assplode

v21 said @ 10:13am GMT on 23rd Jan help, the comments are broken I cant see any of them.

v21 said @ 10:13am GMT on 23rd Jan That last comment just dissapeared to I know not where Is this the pink page?

v21 said @ 10:14am GMT on 23rd Jan ?

relm said @ 11:02pm GMT on 1st Feb Additional plugins are required to display all the media on this page. Additional RAM is also needed.

[ploink] said @ 1:21am GMT on 5th Mar Warning: mysql_num_rows(): supplied argument is not a valid MySQL result resource in /var/www/sensibleerection.com/html/entry.php on line 123 Comments Silk said @ 8:20am on 17th May [Score:1 Informative] - moderate/reply bo illox said @ 12:05am on 3rd Jan - moderate/reply well this is frigging strange, 404, the end of time, the land of crap. nothing... oh well, if it ain't here then it probably wasn't worth seeing anyway. guess your going to have to get your goetse or tranpron or autopsy photos what ever god awful crap you were looking for somewhere else, because there's a reason it doesn't exist here, and a reason you can't find it, you sick freak... follywaggle said @ 5:23am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply the reason is out there Modano said @ 2:22pm on 29th Oct - moderate/reply Mo' Drano wuz here. illox said @ 12:05am on 3rd Jan [Score:1 Interesting] - moderate/reply well this is frigging strange, 404, the end of time, the land of crap. nothing... oh well, if it ain't here then it probably wasn't worth seeing anyway. guess your going to have to get your goetse or tranpron or autopsy photos what ever god awful crap you were looking for somewhere else, because there's a reason it doesn't exist here, and a reason you can't find it, you sick freak... smada said @ 5:07pm on 24th Feb - moderate/reply smada said @ 5:07pm on 24th Feb - moderate/reply Mwha n nm said @ 5:54pm on 5th Jun - moderate/reply sdf lmnop said @ 3:01pm on 29th Jul - moderate/reply foreach Phaedrine said @ 5:53am on 9th Nov - moderate/reply フゥ~! said @ 5:40am on 9th Jun [Score:5] - moderate/reply haha this is the lost page..... maybe I should write an error.. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- SORRY WE COULD NOT FIND THE PAGE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR -------------------------------------------------------------------------- De_Wr0ng said @ 5:24pm on 6th Aug - moderate/reply Start of test Really the end of the test f00m said @ 11:34pm on 20th Dec - moderate/reply w00t X-files music! At124 said @ 12:22pm on 16th Jul - moderate/reply Rojo^ said @ 1:38am on 11th Jan - moderate/reply Rojo^ said @ 1:39am on 11th Jan - moderate/reply f00m said @ 2:02pm on 1st Feb - moderate/reply ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ SORRY, WE COULD NOT FIND THE PAGE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ At124 said @ 12:21pm on 16th Jul - moderate/reply dagfari said @ 2:00am on 3rd Feb - moderate/reply I can't resist commenting... Britney said @ 1:49pm on 10th Jun [Score:1 Interesting] - moderate/reply I know I may be young, but I got feelings too. smada said @ 6:08pm on 12th Jan - moderate/reply OMFFG Bri7n3y is Teh H4wT s3XXX0rZ At124 said @ 8:59am on 2nd Nov - moderate/reply Only the marque & blink tags should be allowed! At124 said @ 9:01am on 2nd Nov - moderate/reply Only the marquee & blink tag should be allowed! f00m said @ 9:06am on 11th Apr - moderate/reply I have feelings in my pants. Spunky_Monkey said @ 11:07pm on 15th Jun - moderate/reply What is this place you have led me to? Crysallis said @ 3:36pm on 7th Jul - moderate/reply 404 baybeh! DirtyBirdy said @ 3:12pm on 10th Jul - moderate/reply wow, it's the secret hidden section of SE... Chop-Logik said @ 5:24pm on 23rd Jul - moderate/reply YUO = FUX0rED UP/ EPT said @ 1:17pm on 3rd Aug - moderate/reply Abandon all hope ye who enter here - here be dragons! Jason Velocity said @ 1:36pm on 3rd Aug - moderate/reply Now that is cool Supa Secret Hideout! david_the_bumblebee said @ 3:25pm on 3rd Aug - moderate/reply WTFack? smada said @ 5:08pm on 24th Feb - moderate/reply worthlessfugarte here older guestbook profile 2003-02-19 at 10:13 p.m. Today was no good. I wish I knew how too say more. 2003-02-04 at 8:56 p.m. today= a new haircut a new rug michael and I moved my guitar to my room. hurrah. 2003-01-27 at 12:10 a.m. it's supposed to look like me. it I suppose I'm a bit chunkier. 2003-01-19 at 2:28 a.m. That's me! at fat camp! In the top left corner with my back turned! I'm the one with my hands on my hips not wrestling! me again! standing up in the black mab shirt! it looks like that guy is about to grab my ass. p.s. my sleeves are up because it was extra hot that day, not trying to look snazzy or anything. at it's peak, the temperature was about 97º. I'm up in the top right corner. hurrah. well those are all that I could fine. previous or next Rude Boy said @ 3:37pm on 4th Aug - moderate/reply Sunday, 4 August 2002 BoyGirlBang quote [ This is the very first video I ever shot, and I wanted to start things out with a bang, so I used the biggest, fattest, loser I've ever met - Bob. Anyway, I took Bob to a local mall and we spent nearly an entire day looking for a chick willing to do him before we finally found Mariah in the parking lot. It ended up costing $600, but it was worth it! Enjoy the video! ] posted by airkiwi @ 5:10am GMT | add to watchlist | 4 comments (2 new) Hi-grade SE New sexylosers! Just thought I'd share. :) posted by windex @ 3:03pm GMT | add to watchlist | 14 comments Low quality SE matt said @ 5:17pm on 4th Aug - moderate/reply I like it up the bum. smada said @ 1:46pm on 20th Feb - moderate/reply indeed gallery404 said @ 2:34am on 28th Aug - moderate/reply Do you douche or use and enema first? Can you have an orgasm just from anal? Or is just more injoyable, much the way many women love the feelings, penetration, opening yourself, giving pleasure without and actual culmination of ejaculet? Does your ass leak later, or get out of sorts? Thanks in advance! tristan said @ 6:28pm on 4th Aug - moderate/reply And I like giving it up the bum. Bend over, sexy. kuskus said @ 3:01pm on 29th Dec - moderate/reply Both of you bend over Robyn said @ 7:36pm on 4th Aug - moderate/reply I just like it period! Its just unfortunate I dont get it from Amul Muzz cause he is the sexiest beast evah!!!!!! I Roxxoer teh L33ts!!!! Fenny said @ 4:20pm on 11th Mar - moderate/reply whatever happened to Amul Muzz, he was teh cool? [ploink] said @ 12:16am on 24th Aug - moderate/reply wow, what an interesting page http://exploitationnow.com/ http://truemeaningoflife.com/ http://www.blindwino.com/driver.html http://tang.keenspace.com/ http://sluggy.com/ http://gpf-comics.com/ http://www.explodingdog.com/ http://www.dieselsweeties.com/ http://yellow5.com/pokey/ http://isometric.spaceninja.com/ http://hammerspace.fojar.com/ http://hensel.lifepatterns.net/ Interficium said @ 8:41pm on 24th Aug [Score:-1 Troll] - moderate/reply Sluggy fucking sucks and always has. [ploink] said @ 11:32pm on 24th Aug - moderate/reply Did I say you could speak? Jag said @ 1:28pm on 29th Aug - moderate/reply Sluggy is kinda losing its humor. For a while, it was funny... now, it's horrible. Meh, the best of us can fall Jor said @ 9:04pm on 11th Sep - moderate/reply Just testing ;) test [url]http://www.cannedtunes.net/fusker/?uri=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.babesandcars.com%2Fcc-content%2Fcontent%2Fcsbpics%2Fmatrix%2Fadashabd1024%2Fhigh%2FO-adashabdGG%5B001-133%5D.jpg&displaytype=images[/url] Jor said @ 9:04pm on 11th Sep - moderate/reply Just testing ;) test [url]http://www.cannedtunes.net/fusker/?uri=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.babesandcars.com%2Fcc-content%2Fcontent%2Fcsbpics%2Fmatrix%2Fadashabd1024%2Fhigh%2FO-adashabdGG%5B001-133%5D.jpg&displaytype=images[/url] phishfood said @ 2:54am on 13th Sep - moderate/reply FUCK Y'ALL I'M PHISHPHOOD AND YOU CAN EAT MA BALL'Z friedbeer said @ 3:15am on 29th Sep - moderate/reply Hello to the fine gentlemen & ladies of SE. *burp* co.pilot said @ 5:05pm on 1st Nov - moderate/reply what the hell is this? some sort of sensible erection easter egg? BergZ said @ 8:28am on 11th Jan - moderate/reply Golgatha, SE style. Spunky_Monkey said @ 7:35pm on 10th Nov [Score:1 Insightful] - moderate/reply I think THIS is where we should hide the pr0n links von_sanchez said @ 3:40pm on 11th Aug - moderate/reply Why not in 8008135? Jamouse said @ 4:27pm on 11th Nov - moderate/reply Egads little hell said @ 9:36pm on 13th Nov - moderate/reply all those dead babies......jesus glass blowing christ buggering a dolphin! Trigger said @ 2:23am on 14th Nov - moderate/reply MENTION NO FETII IN THIS MOST SACRED OF PLACES. p_headless_g said @ 12:00pm on 28th Apr - moderate/reply Fetus. Fetus, fetus, fucking fetus. Fetus fetus bo betus, banana fana fo fetus, me mi mo metus... FETUS!!! See? That's what you get. Mention no fetii indeed... How, may I ask??!?! Fetus... Robyn said @ 3:13pm on 23rd Dec - moderate/reply Merry Christmas. Deeez nuuutz. Evan said @ 2:46pm on 26th Dec - moderate/reply lol look what i stumpled onto.. rebbel said @ 3:24am on 3rd Jan - moderate/reply yummy yummy, nice chickies!! follywaggle said @ 2:30pm on 12th Jan - moderate/reply And yet as of now it only has a +1 he he. Hummus! said @ 3:09pm on 15th Jan [Score:1 Insightful] - moderate/reply HUMMUS! LOVE YOU ALL!!! what this anyway!? Trigger said @ 11:07pm on 6th May - moderate/reply COME BACK TO US HUMMUS!!!! nyq said @ 12:11am on 23rd Jan - moderate/reply dear me. EPT said @ 10:18am on 26th Jan - moderate/reply My god, that's a lot of mods. Where's my +/- 0 Confused? friedbeer said @ 5:17pm on 26th Jan - moderate/reply Belladonna gives great head. :P awsmm said @ 5:05pm on 17th Feb - moderate/reply Please let me out, Matt, I'll check the adult box next time!!!!!!! Andrew said @ 4:48am on 2nd Mar - moderate/reply Where... am I? o_o Chop-Logik said @ 9:05am on 2nd Mar - moderate/reply 3000th comment! Chop-Logik said @ 9:06am on 2nd Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 7:10am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute. p_headless_g said @ 6:12am on 28th Apr - moderate/reply I knew I shouldn't have eaten that bag of gravy I found in the parking lot... It's like... through... the looking glass... man... *bleeds away into the night sky* tomble said @ 10:20pm on 1st May - moderate/reply What is this place? MEEJA HOR said @ 1:34am on 29th Jul [Score:1 Funny] - moderate/reply This is 'the fourth place', Playstation got the third one sensibleb said @ 2:59am on 18th May - moderate/reply Bonehead hax0r nuked the SE front page, so I stumbled in here by accident. I feel so L337. Here is a broken image link: Chop-Logik said @ 3:13am on 18th May - moderate/reply thanks :) /me regrets looking at the code :D sensibleb said @ 3:46am on 18th May - moderate/reply /me knew you would. ;-D sensibleb said @ 3:00am on 18th May - moderate/reply Bonehead hax0r nuked the SE front page, so I stumbled in here by accident. I feel so L337. Here is a broken image link: sensibleb said @ 3:42am on 18th May [Score:1 Funny] - moderate/reply This was not a double-post. It's just an artifact created by the symmetry of this interdimensional nether-page. Raoul Duke said @ 7:02am on 8th Jun [Score:2 Insightful] - moderate/reply We were just outside of SE, on the edge of the web, when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like, "I feel a bit lightheaded, I think I fucked up the site." All of a sudden, the screen was filled with the ravings and babblings of porn addicts. Eh, fuck it. :) Raoul Duke said @ 7:02am on 8th Jun [Score:1 Funny] - moderate/reply We were just outside of SE, on the edge of the web, when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like, "I feel a bit lightheaded, I think I fucked up the site." All of a sudden, the screen was filled with the ravings and babblings of porn addicts. Eh, fuck it. :) Raoul Duke said @ 7:09am on 8th Jun - moderate/reply 2003, a double post on the internet. I recall one afternoon on SE, there I was - mother of God, there I I am /\/\ - I was a natural web addict, just clicking on whatever came by... Raoul Duke said @ 7:15am on 8th Jun - moderate/reply Apologies to the Good Doctor. donnie said @ 1:42pm on 19th Jun - moderate/reply dooooeeeesss annnnyyyoooonnneee waaannnnnnnnttt soooommmeee SSSSSSSS EEEEEEE? Iiiiii gggggoooootttaaaaallll theeeeeee mmmmaaakkkkings riiiiggghhht heeeeeereee. Alllllll iiiiii neeeeddddddiiiizzza plllllaaaacccceeee tooo ffffffaaaappppp...... sensibleb said @ 10:04am on 23rd Jun - moderate/reply FFFFFAAAAAPPPPP-FFFffAAAaaPPPpp-FFfffAAaaaPPppp- FffffAaaaaPpppp-ffffaaaapppp-fffaaappp-ffaapp-fap-fap-fap... (echoes off into the inky distance) grinick said @ 9:53pm on 28th Dec - moderate/reply IGNORE THE EFFECTS OF THIS TERRIBLE DRUG PERL_ZEALOT said @ 6:32pm on 14th Jun - moderate/reply I am still awesome. Chop-Logik said @ 7:12pm on 14th Jun - moderate/reply OMRGM U SUX Chop-Logik said @ 7:13pm on 14th Jun - moderate/reply bfgbgb housewares said @ 7:24pm on 14th Jun - moderate/reply where's the pron? housewares said @ 7:25pm on 14th Jun - moderate/reply ? housewares said @ 7:26pm on 14th Jun - moderate/reply The Library of Babel housewares said @ 7:26pm on 14th Jun - moderate/reply "groovy" graham said @ 6:18pm on 16th Jun - moderate/reply wtf colinxp said @ 7:21am on 25th Jun - moderate/reply i am a cyberspace cowboy. account said @ 2:37pm on 25th Jun - moderate/reply What the fuck indeed. Pink and purple-you are now turning gay. stmpynode said @ 2:19pm on 2nd Jul - moderate/reply how straaange. i will have to leave my mark. [X] insanemonkey said @ 12:04pm on 7th Jul - moderate/reply well well well...wasn't expecting this....pink...hmmm...how odd Chop-Logik said @ 7:35am on 8th Jul - moderate/reply you have smada to thank for that. mykel said @ 5:52am on 15th Jul - moderate/reply Heh.. I found this on my own. I AM SO SMRT!! This is why you never have your post IDs sorted chronologically ;) felix said @ 1:45pm on 22nd Jul - moderate/reply ooh, behind the curtain Crysallis said @ 1:57pm on 22nd Jul - moderate/reply Close that door! Crysallis said @ 7:50am on 23rd Jul - moderate/reply Another_One said @ 3:17pm on 22nd Jul - moderate/reply Banished by Crysallis @#%&^ vahid said @ 6:44am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply oh how cute.............. phishfood said @ 7:05am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply POOOOOOOOO gunthar said @ 7:29am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply I fjrrred my pants. MEEJA HOR said @ 8:02am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply all this pink is making me feel rather camp mzxfan said @ 8:11am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply so this is what is in the end of wormholes... racerx said @ 8:24am on 28th Jul - moderate/reply What the fuck is wrong with SE? De_Wr0ng said @ 12:04pm on 28th Jul - moderate/reply WTF? sensibleb said @ 1:19pm on 28th Jul [Score:1 Informative] - moderate/reply Ok, there was this one time, when I was six years old, that I was sitting in front of the TV watching Deputy Dawg and eating peanut butter and jelly, that a plane crashed outside my house, only it wasn't a plane, it was a school bus, but it fell out of the sky, which for some reason was pink instead of blue, and anyway, this school bus fell out of the sky, and I ran outside to see if anyone was hurt, and the bus driver was Gino Vanelli, that guy who had those songs in the 80's about wild horses and black cars, and I asked him if school buses looked better in the shade, but he just kind of burbled "bllt-blb-ughh-blbb", because his face must have hit the steering wheel when he hit the ground, and most of his teeth were gone, well not gone really, a few of them were still stuck in the steering wheel and one or two were on the green plastic seat, which looked kind of brownish under the pink sky, and I thought maybe I should call an ambulance, but there was no one else on the bus but Gino, and I didn't care for him much anyway, so I went back inside and finished my sandwich. sensibleb said @ 1:23pm on 28th Jul - moderate/reply Oh, and I like the number fifteen. LeavemeAlone said @ 1:28pm on 28th Jul - moderate/reply Wow, this is really fucked up. I hope I get back to reality. mewse said @ 2:37pm on 28th Jul - moderate/reply oh my god wtf is going on, why are all the links pink, who posted the topic, wheres my sandwich colinxp said @ 3:58pm on 28th Jul - moderate/reply ahhh, i was hoping id be back here someday. arteitle said @ 11:21pm on 28th Jul [Score:3 Funny] - moderate/reply You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension: a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into... the Twilight Zone. jornin said @ 1:16am on 29th Jul - moderate/reply Is SE ever going to work properly again? MEEJA HOR said @ 1:32am on 29th Jul [Score:2 Funny] - moderate/reply In some ways i hope it doesn't. Every blog needs a gay pink backdoor to enhance it's mass appeal sensibleb said @ 6:18pm on 30th Jul [Score:1 Interesting] - moderate/reply Tee hee... you said gay pink backdoor. Trigger said @ 9:25am on 13th Aug - moderate/reply Tee hee... you said gay pink backdoor quaint said @ 9:24am on 23rd Oct - moderate/reply Astonishing..... In light of all these people saying "Gay pink backdoor", you too have managed to say "Gay pink Backdoor"!. Something seems amiss leezurd said @ 1:52am on 29th Jul - moderate/reply Woops! Wrong door, sorry. De_Wr0ng said @ 6:43am on 10th Aug - moderate/reply End of test f00m@nB@r said @ 5:42am on 13th Aug - moderate/reply --> De_Wr0ng said @ 6:39am on 10th Aug - moderate/reply This still be errie. De_Wr0ng said @ 6:41am on 10th Aug - moderate/reply --> Double heh De_Wr0ng said @ 6:43am on 10th Aug - moderate/reply --> skrewlooze said @ 2:59pm on 26th Aug - moderate/reply bizarro world. whatfor said @ 6:33pm on 26th Aug - moderate/reply Here is where all of your pink flowing goodness dwells intimately with your main brain. Or, not..... Rammek said @ 1:13am on 27th Aug - moderate/reply *wants to be part of the action* *hangs around* Oh well, that was fun. Bye. De_Wr0ng said @ 1:31am on 27th Aug - moderate/reply What you all doing in my play room. Wahhhhhhhh .... Mommy...... EPT said @ 12:17pm on 27th Aug - moderate/reply Damn, there's another secret post somwhere, but I can't remember where... Neo Kojiro said @ 4:03am on 31st Aug - moderate/reply Well, to quote Chop-Logik: "OMG OMGWTF!" graham said @ 6:51am on 21st Sep - moderate/reply omg....the links are pink like the inside of my anus... insensate said @ 3:02pm on 22nd Feb - moderate/reply Thanks for sharing. verycleanteeth said @ 6:26am on 22nd Sep - moderate/reply why is it pink? BTW, I wonder if people instinctively hit their brakes when they careen off cliffs teh voice of teh intarweb said @ 2:46am on 23rd Sep - moderate/reply THIS IS TEH VOICE OF TEH INTARWEB Mr. Langosta said @ 4:31pm on 30th Sep - moderate/reply Found this on accident. 9/30/03 rick_fagnolia said @ 6:11pm on 13th Oct - moderate/reply I=teh scared of the secret page graham said @ 8:02am on 8th Nov [Score:1 Insightful] - moderate/reply I just tried to squeeze out a fart, and sent out a little poo. little poo said @ 9:56am on 17th May - moderate/reply And...Boy are my arms TIRED ! v21 said @ 5:00am on 25th Nov - moderate/reply I don't think this is a good idea... I am nowhere near a long time member (just over as year) and i go through the archives when i am bored. I think, especially with the idea of sorting posts by over all + mods as suggested at the top of this post and matt's last post, that disallowing mods on old posts wouldn't be the best idea. Comments could have the timestamp tests, but entries like the dirty joke contest a while ago would be unfavorably affected. ballinyourmouth said @ 10:22pm on 28th Nov - moderate/reply I am full of awesome blindnerd said @ 2:17pm on 5th Dec - moderate/reply Testing test testies blindnerd said @ 2:18pm on 5th Dec - moderate/reply Testing test testies nip said @ 5:34pm on 9th Dec - moderate/reply There is no erection. nip said @ 5:38pm on 9th Dec - moderate/reply Should have taken the blue pill. Neo??? I BELIEVE!!! Chicken Nuts said @ 6:06pm on 9th Dec - moderate/reply Holy Fux... p_headless_g said @ 7:16pm on 9th Dec - moderate/reply 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p_headless_g said @ 7:19pm on 9th Dec - moderate/reply 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arteitle said @ 7:46pm on 9th Dec - moderate/reply 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graham said @ 9:37pm on 14th Dec - moderate/reply WHERE IS MY HANDY PICTUAR!?!?! Vampire_X said @ 11:52pm on 14th Dec - moderate/reply +watchlist http://www.wickeddownloads.com/tazboard/indexy.html kafir said @ 8:03am on 15th Dec - moderate/reply this is bizarre. and the music..... Vampire_X said @ 8:07am on 15th Dec - moderate/reply yeah... Vampire_X said @ 8:08am on 15th Dec - moderate/reply also, someone has made all the text purple... graham said @ 11:51am on 15th Dec - moderate/reply Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute. graham said @ 11:51am on 15th Dec - moderate/reply Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute. graham said @ 11:51am on 15th Dec - moderate/reply Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute. graham said @ 11:52am on 15th Dec - moderate/reply Chop-Logik said @ 3:06pm on 1st Mar - moderate/reply Thanks to smada for making all the links pink. wonderful. smada said @ 1:10pm on 27th Jul - moderate/reply i think it's really cute. Vampire_X said @ 6:11pm on 15th Dec - moderate/reply i suppose you where the one who made the background black too? Vampire_X said @ 6:12pm on 15th Dec - moderate/reply actualy, scrach that "too" De_Wr0ng said @ 2:03am on 21st Dec - moderate/reply Black? Todomanna said @ 9:23am on 19th Dec - moderate/reply Weeeeeeeeeeee! Todomanna said @ 10:48am on 19th Dec - moderate/reply Did I mention "Weeeeeeeeeeee!"? nip said @ 10:39am on 19th Dec - moderate/reply ......I'm madly in love with teh ch0rp! Chop-Logik said @ 6:45am on 4th Oct - moderate/reply I GOT IT ALL ON TAPE Shutup said @ 8:14pm on 20th Dec - moderate/reply This page owned mozilla. Which begs the question, where am I? Baxter_UK said @ 10:34pm on 20th Dec - moderate/reply Fuck, you've gone completely sideways, man. It'll blow you straight through the wall, stone dead in ten seconds. grinick said @ 9:58pm on 28th Dec - moderate/reply Ignore the effects of this....terrible drug f00m said @ 11:33pm on 20th Dec - moderate/reply lmao X-files music letoofdune said @ 3:48am on 21st Dec - moderate/reply Holy shit. I'm at the end of the web. SE is t3h p0wnd! sensibleb said @ 3:58am on 21st Dec - moderate/reply (When I think of Marck, I touch myself) letoofdune said @ 4:08am on 21st Dec - moderate/reply you too? germanjulian said @ 9:34am on 29th Dec - moderate/reply ?????????????? wehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Chris Woods said @ 10:48am on 29th Dec - moderate/reply Huh. The page at the end of the world. And I can't resist the urge to comment. f00m said @ 3:07pm on 29th Dec - moderate/reply but how do i soment? utah said @ 1:55am on 30th Dec - moderate/reply I hope I haven't brained my damage... Rouge_Element said @ 5:05am on 30th Dec - moderate/reply OMG! graham said @ 8:05am on 30th Dec - moderate/reply THIS POST IS NULL VOID DELEETEEED penisinface said @ 9:52pm on 30th Dec - moderate/reply this space intentionaly left blank Vampire_X said @ 7:57pm on 5th Jan - moderate/reply JibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabbervvJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabber Vampire_X said @ 8:03pm on 5th Jan - moderate/reply JibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabbervvJibberjabberJibberjabberJibberjabber JOECAM said @ 9:45am on 6th Jan - moderate/reply WTF larger2day said @ 9:50am on 6th Jan - moderate/reply Hey hey!! larger2day said @ 9:51am on 6th Jan - moderate/reply OMG the x files theme !!!! Mr. Langosta said @ 6:57pm on 10th Jan - moderate/reply 'THE 120 DAYS OF SODOM' by The Marquis de Sade Translated by Austryn Wainhouse and Richard Seaver INTRODUCTION The extensive wars wherewith Louis XIV was burdened during his reign, while draining the State's treasury and exhausting the substance of the people, none the less contained the secret that led to the prosperity of a swarm of those bloodsuckers who are always on the watch for public calamities, which, instead of appeasing, they promote or invent so as, precisely, to be able to profit from them the more advantageously. The end of this so very sublime reign was perhaps one of the periods in the history of the French Empire when one saw the emergence of the greatest number of these mysterious fortunes whose origins are as obscure as the lust and debauchery that accompany them. It was toward the close of

oth3r said @ 5:25pm GMT on 12th Mar hello

hoboninja said @ 5:14pm GMT on 5th Apr That's AT THE DRIVE IN!

shiney things said @ 4:30pm GMT on 25th Apr i wanna play!

steele.ero said @ 11:03am GMT on 10th Jun This is why we can't have nice things...

arrowhen said @ 1:03pm GMT on 18th Jun I believe I may have reached this page in error.

Naruki said @ 1:35am GMT on 11th Jul Hello?

steele.ero said @ 1:19pm GMT on 14th Jul Is it safe?

-_- said @ 1:24pm GMT on 14th Jul Is it ever safe?

steele.ero said @ 1:25pm GMT on 14th Jul No longer.

-_- said @ 1:28pm GMT on 14th Jul safety in numbers.

-_- said @ 1:28pm GMT on 14th Jul or the lack there of.

-_- said @ 1:28pm GMT on 14th Jul or the understanding of.

steele.ero said @ 1:29pm GMT on 14th Jul short and sweet continues the meet :)

-_- said @ 1:31pm GMT on 14th Jul oh ,but it comes to this.

steele.ero said @ 1:35pm GMT on 14th Jul I'm thinking :)

steele.ero said @ 1:36pm GMT on 14th Jul And missy is watching :P

-_- said @ 1:36pm GMT on 14th Jul :)

-_- said @ 1:37pm GMT on 14th Jul missy?

-_- said @ 1:37pm GMT on 14th Jul I liked your comment.

-_- said @ 1:37pm GMT on 14th Jul about using primes.

-_- said @ 1:37pm GMT on 14th Jul in your SE code.

steele.ero said @ 1:38pm GMT on 14th Jul my nickname for him/her. missy and shirley :)

-_- said @ 1:38pm GMT on 14th Jul funny , inside joke.

steele.ero said @ 1:38pm GMT on 14th Jul that should be missy and shirley :)

-_- said @ 1:38pm GMT on 14th Jul right

steele.ero said @ 1:39pm GMT on 14th Jul It's on my mind mang.

-_- said @ 1:39pm GMT on 14th Jul good nicknames.

steele.ero said @ 1:39pm GMT on 14th Jul *waves to missy*

-_- said @ 1:39pm GMT on 14th Jul it will wake you up.

-_- said @ 1:40pm GMT on 14th Jul once you get sleep.

steele.ero said @ 1:40pm GMT on 14th Jul I didn't get to sleep till noon 2day :/

-_- said @ 1:41pm GMT on 14th Jul *blows kiss*

steele.ero said @ 1:41pm GMT on 14th Jul sucked. but my meeting went well.

-_- said @ 1:41pm GMT on 14th Jul I figured.

steele.ero said @ 1:42pm GMT on 14th Jul I'll catch you later.

steele.ero said @ 1:42pm GMT on 14th Jul Gonna hit the bar in a bit.

-_- said @ 1:43pm GMT on 14th Jul check your PMs.

-_- said @ 1:44pm GMT on 14th Jul I may not be around.

LordFeldo said @ 8:03pm GMT on 14th Jul cuuute.

augur_ said @ 1:03pm GMT on 22nd Jul I feel so... so strange.

Ariz said @ 1:10pm GMT on 26th Jul Holy jesus hell fuck anus. I have stumbled upon somthing greater then your moms vagina.

f00m@nB@r said @ 4:11pm GMT on 26th Jul anybody home?

krupa said @ 7:46am GMT on 3rd Aug This is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny!

Trench said @ 4:53pm GMT on 14th Sep SEXY

b said @ 6:10pm GMT on 26th Oct SEXY LIKE HORSE

p_headless_g said @ 5:06am GMT on 3rd Oct

monkeytooth said @ 7:42am GMT on 24th Jan Wheee!

Sgt Harry 'Snapper' Organs.. said @ 9:03pm GMT on 1st Mar [Score:1 Insightful] HELLLO!

riotstylefire said @ 4:54pm GMT on 30th May [Score:1 Insightful] interesting

riotstylefire said @ 4:54pm GMT on 30th May most

sythe said @ 1:31pm GMT on 5th Jul ...

Nihil said @ 4:10am GMT on 29th Sep Ah, always nice to spend some time at the end of the Internet. So, anyone chillin' here? Other than my mom, I mean*. * I pre-emptively disrupted any possible "your mom" jokes! If I were just a bit smarter, I could become President of the USA.

anger_die said @ 8:39am GMT on 8th Oct [Score:-1 Overrated]

Jewbacchus said @ 2:24am GMT on 29th Oct Who...ruined...this place?

steele.ero said @ 2:28am GMT on 29th Oct sparta?

Jewbacchus said @ 2:36am GMT on 29th Oct WHERE IS THE MUSIC. WHERE IS THE MARQUIS DE SADE!!?

anger_die said @ 9:31am GMT on 15th Nov I see. Well if sadomasochism is your game, and crashing browsers is that important to you, you can bring it back. But I say let's vote on this. Bring back the browser crashing? Or Keep it clean?

anger_die said @ 2:23pm GMT on 16th Nov ahh screw it.

leezurd said @ 2:31pm GMT on 16th Nov If you insist.

anger_die said @ 3:26pm GMT on 16th Nov ??

donnie said @ 2:41am GMT on 29th Oct wtf? years of masterpiece post gone 0_0 how??

Jewbacchus said @ 2:45am GMT on 29th Oct MAAAARRRRRRRCCCCCKKK

steele.ero said @ 2:50am GMT on 29th Oct MORTAL KOMBAT!

sythe said @ 8:46pm GMT on 29th Oct *starts up crappy techno music*

p_headless_g said @ 11:54am GMT on 16th Nov YOU BASTARDS! YOU BLEW IT UP!!

KingTaco said @ 9:00am GMT on 2nd Dec Kickass.

Vampire_X said @ 8:22pm GMT on 11th Jan whats with the lazercat? anyway, all good things must come to an end. it was time

Ashura_Stephanos said @ 1:34pm GMT on 5th Feb I MISS IT D:

anger_die said @ 2:25pm GMT on 11th Mar wtf???

Nihil said @ 2:24am GMT on 12th Mar props for preserving the opening post tho

tamp said @ 11:37am GMT on 13th Mar tampootampoo

tamp said @ 6:13am GMT on 13th Apr http://www.hermes-press.com/fascist_capitalism.htm

Fenny said @ 12:54pm GMT on 13th Apr DON'T POLLUTE THE NETHERVERSE WITH YOUR SHITTY VERSE!

taeyn said @ 4:47am GMT on 23rd Apr ALL YOUR BASE BELONG HERE.

graham said @ 9:05pm GMT on 20th Nov :D

Vernes said @ 8:47am GMT on 19th Dec ... I mistyped an url and now I am here. Where am I?

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